So sad. I need my sisters.

[Katey Alpha Gam]

Hi girls. I am really bummed out right now. I met the guy of my dreams and now he's going to the Coast Guard. I met Beau a few months ago through mutual friends (a frmr sister and my best friend actually) and the second I met him I knew there was something about him that I really really saw. We hit it off immediately and we started seeing each other when we could (he worked at a camp, so he'd only be able to get down to the area to see me maybe once a week) then about a month into it, things are going well; but he gets transferred to a camp 3 1/2 hours away from here (he's a professional counselor actually. He's worked at Space Camp and stuff) and he was up there to teach survival training to kids (he'd take them canoeing for a few days and then they would backpack back up) well I was bummed but I thought that it was ok b/c it was just until August and then he'd come home and we'd get serious. Well, he called me a few weeks before he was supposed to come home and told me he was coming home to join the Coast Guard. My heart immediately sank. I mean I'm really proud of him b/c it's a great thing and he's going in to be an Aviation Survival Tech, which means he jumps out of helicopters into water to save ppl. A GREAT thing to do and something that fits him perfectly (he is the most altruistic, kind and loving soul naturally that I have ever met) but it's also sad b/c he's leaving in October. Well I was trying to make the best of it but last week he tells me hes moving an hour away until he ships out for a job. So even the time he is going to be here, I'm not going to see him much. I'd be ok with this, but slowly in the past few months I have totally and completely fallen in love with him. I dated someone for 4 years and never felt how I do for Beau. Before I met him I told my best friend that I wasn't interested in dealing w/the drama of a relationship unless I knew the guy was worth it. Then I met him and he is sooooo worth it. I honestly feel like he fits me like my puzzle piece. I know he likes me, but he's not in love w/me; which is fine and I understand that. But it's like all I want to do is even be in the same room w/him and I can't even be in the same city. Plus, I have noticed lately that he's trying to protect himself and kinda guard himself from his feelings for me so it doesn't hurt him when he leaves. Which I understand but thats emotional suicide too. I want to be able to love him as much I can bfore he goes and then see how things are from there. This is so hard b/c I never put my heart on the line and the one time I do and when I finally meet someone that I know I want to be with for a very long time, he's leaving for a very long time. I'm sorry, but I just needed to vent and I needed some sisterly support to help me through. I know some of you have dated ppl in the service before so I was wondering if you could give me some advice too. Thanks girls, I love you all!

[Kristin AGD]

Katey I am soooo sorry .

I hope you and Beau can find a way to make this work out. My sister was dating her husband when he went into the Air Force. And they made it through. He was in Mississippi, then Sacramento. It was hard on them at times. And the engagement was even harder. But they made it through. She lives in Sacramento now. Which is hard on me, LOL.
Hopefully Beau will realize how special you are during this time he will be close by. If you are both dedicated, I think anything is possible.

LiEP,
~Kristin

[kddani]

no to intrude in your forum, but I just wanted to share in your heartache.

My kinda-sorta-guy is in the navy, on a sub, and is based out of Seattle. I'm in Pittsburgh.

he is SO resistant to committing himself to a relationship with me because he can't give 100%, and that there's very long periods of time where he's underwater and I won't hear from him for a month at a time.

but like you, i'm willing to do what i can, because i've never felt this way about anyone.

feel free to PM me or IM me anytime if you need to talk to someone in the same sort of position

Ooh...sisters, one name comes to mind when I read Katey's post.

BRADY. I'm sure you old timers remember that one.

BM2 Brady was also enlisted in the Coast Guard on a cutter stationed out of Sand Island -- about 10 minutes from my house. Out of the two years we were together, he was deployed to all these places 2 months at a time 5 times throughout out relationship...so if you factor in the 24 months, and take out the 10 in which he was deployed, we were together together for only about...oh, a little over a year. Would you believe I became his girlfriend 3 days before he shipped out to Guam for 2 months? Email and snail mail from Guam, Hong Kong, Mexico, and Japan were so appreciated....oh and the PHONE CALLS!

We ended up having a nasty breakup, but it wasn't because of the military or because he was gone all the time. When I was with him, because I was so in love with him at that time, I learned how to be proud of what he was doing and to appreciate the military even though I hated how he went away all the time.

It is going to be hard, but I encourage you to let him know how you feel when you're ready because he deserves to know. If he does truly care about you, then things will fall into place. From there, take it one day at a time. I'm being honest when I say that it's going to be difficult, but you know you've always got us! Trust me girl, I have been there!

[greeklawgirl]

I have no experience with this kind of situation at all, so I defer to the wise advice of everyone above me. I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you and hoping that everything works out for the best.