Should I be insulted?

[SkeeWee14]

Hello Sorors,
I was just sitting here thinking about how people have reacted to me since crossing over
(3/26/00)and I've noticed an obvious change in the attitudes of many people. The truely "surprised" attitudes don't bother me at all. It's really funny considering how so many people assumed that I would go Delta because my best friend is a Delta and I socialize with a lot of Delta's. Anyway, the thing that bothers me the most is the reaction/change in attitude from the men of A Phi A. Prior to my crossing many of the guys never even said as much as hello or even cracked a smile. Since being pinned they are all very friendly and are quick to strike up a conversation. Please don't misunderstand me, I love all of the love and friendship that they extend towards me. I'm just wondering why couldn't they be as friendly and as opene prior to my crossing? It's not as if the first time they ever came into contact with me is after crossing, because I have classes with many of them. I was just wondering if I have the right to be offended by this and if I should call them on their "change of attitude?"

[LadyAKA]

Personally I would not take offense, people in general will start to notice you more because of your affiliation with Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Inc. Now I would be a bit peeved if people used to straight dis me and because of my entrance into a sorority, now they want to be friendly. I guess I would advise you to look at who your real friends/Sorors/Frat are. Who has been there for you and who will be there standing beside you in the end. I have many associates, they come and they go but my personal friendships last a life time. I wish you luck and welcome to Alpha Kappa Alpha, enjoy her and treat her well!
Sisterly,
LadyAKA

[AKAtude]

I noticed the same thing as well after I crossed. However, I wasn't too offended because I never spoke to them either or had a real desire to. The Alphas had a line that went over the same semester as my line, and I really only spoke to those members I knew before pledging. I did not ignore them, but I did not go out of my way to hold a conversation with them. Like I said earlier posts, I felt closer to the Kappas on my campus than to the Alphas.

However, I will say that maybe you should try to find out how they thought of you prior to becoming an AKA. I found out that many people had my personality all wrong. Becoming an AKA gave them a chance to interact with me and a lot of those people discovered that I was not at all how they perceived me. Because I considered myself a shy person, I would project this "don't mess with me" facade, and some people were actually intimidated by that. So, give them the benefit of the doubt unless you find out otherwise.

[Crooklyn08]

Soror I wouldn't be offended. They probably don't mean any harm. Not to make excuses for them (because we all know what Excuses are), but they probably didn't show you love b/c maybe they thought they didn't have anything in common with you. Now that you are an AKA, it makes getting to know you that much easier (considering the history between the two organizations). It happened to me when I first crossed, but I knew to expect it.

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AKATUDE - Don't Leave Home Without It!

[LikeASista]

This is hilarious, because it makes me think of my intake process and after my crossing. People do change. I don't know if it is greekdom that makes them change or not. When I crossed, I immediately placed my badge on my car after the coming out, and I hadn't even gotten out of the parking lot yet when a guy who had seen the badge on my car was breaking his neck to see who was driving. LOLOLOLOLOL!!! Before I crossed, I used to hear sorors say "membership has it's priviledges," and they're right. To me, it has always been a status thing. People know it, and I think they simply respond to it.

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No weapon formed against me shall prosper, for I am a child of the Most High God, Who sits upon the Throne of Grace, and rules all Heaven and Earth.

[This message has been edited by AKAtude (edited April 11, 2000).]

[AKAtude]

LikeASoror,

I had to edit your message a bit. We don't want to give away too much info.

[deja]

SORORS,

NOW YOU KNOW, SOME OF US AS FRESHMEN OR PRIOR TO CROSSING, LEND AN INTEREST IN ONE FRATERNITY OR ANOTHER. SOME BROTHERS SOMETIMES WE ARE STEREOTYPED AND MEN, LIKE WOMEN.....FRAT, LIKE SOROR...WE EXPECT THINGS FROM EACH OTHER. IT WOULD BE NICE TO BE KIND TO ONE ANOTHER JUST BECAUSE....I GUESS SOME PEOPLE JUST NEED A REASON TO BE KIND. WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE ALL OF MY MALE FRIENDS WERE KAPPA'S AND OMEGA'S. MY DAD IS AN ALPHA AND I KNOW MANY, BUT I NEVER BEFRIENDED ONE.

PERHAPS THEY WANTED TO SPEAK TO YOU PRIOR BUT BECAUSE YOU ARE SUCH PHENOMONAL WOMAN..THEY WERE INTIMIDATED! AND FOR THAT BABYGIRL I SAY, "SOROR---YOU RE TOO PRETTY"

SKKKEEEEEEEEE WEEEEEEEE!

SOROR DEJA!

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TO WHOM MUCH IS GIVEN....MUCH IS EXPECTED.

[LikeASista]

Originally posted by AKAtude:
LikeASoror,

I had to edit your message a bit. We don't want to give away too much info.

Whoops. Sorry, Soror. I'm still a newbie at this.

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No weapon formed against me shall prosper, for I am a child of the Most High God, Who sits upon the Throne of Grace, and rules all Heaven and Earth.

[tickledpink]

Sorors (LikeASoror & Skeewee 14) take it in stride. It's going to be that way for the rest of your lives! People responded the same way to me when I was initiated way back in , and it seemed so strange because I just felt like the same old me. Now, as a graduate, I recently recieved a promotion and there are all sorts of people speaking to me out of the blue and making small talk. The sad part is like our soror said --- it would be nice if we could just recognize people before letters and titles. But in addition to just realizing who you are once you got your letters, it now makes some people feel important if they can be seen as being affiliated with you. Boy oh boy, politics

Congrats Sorors and if I haven't said it before skeeeeweee! ****oh, and have you been practicing your "noses"?***

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>>>"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."
Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised... Proverbs 31:29-30



[This message has been edited by tickledpink (edited April 11, 2000).]