Should I get Upset?

[home1981]

Hello,I have a question to the lovely ladies of Alpha Kappa Alpha. As you know it is that time of the year and so many greek organizations are having a line. I have an interest an Alpha Kappa Alpha, whereas many of my friends have an interest in DST and two of my friends made the line this spring. I was having a converstation with them and many times they have commented on the fact that DST pledges harder than AKA. My friends have remarked many times that DST is about business because they do not have the legacies and they are on line longer. Again, she said those same things to me today and I got very offended. I understand that you are supposed to have love for your organization,but I feel that she was out of line. I basically went off on her because she made those comments and I was wondering did I do the right thing.Did I have the right to get in her mess because she said those things about the sorority I hope to be apart of one day?

[Miss Discretion]

Home 1981 I am not apart of the organization but I know where you are coming from. One day I hope to become a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha. I have several friends that are apart of DST who ALWAYS comment on AKA, it is just an insecurity that they have. How do they know? Makes you say hmmmm....I feel that it is not about who pledges harder it is more about the sisterhood and what you are doing for the community. Think about it "they discuss what AKA is doing more than they talk about their own sorority." I am being truthful! I have relatives that are AKA's and I have NEVER heard them bash any other sororities, or challenge their own. (Sorry I had to go there) You know what you want and that is all you should be concerned with. Good luck to you.If you have done research you know where the prize is! Sorry for the long post. There is a website for prospects that discuss some of these issues. www.delphi.com/PnkNGrnDreams.com

[This message has been edited by Miss Discretion (edited March 28, 2000).]

[AKAtude]

It seems to me that everyone thinks they pledge "harder" than someone else. Unless they are able to experience initiation through each organization, they will never know. I know that I did not "tip-toe" into AKA. Also, I find that most neophytes seem to think everything they have experienced was "harder" than what someone else went through.

As far as these ladies offending you, are they really your friends? One of my best friends in college and I were on line at the same time, but she was pledging DST. With the exception of a joke here and there, we never said anything to offend each other because we both knew how much our sororities meant to us. She would say things like pink and green does not match and I would say be careful because elephants are afraid of mice. I mean, there were little silly jokes just between the two of us.

Before I became an AKA, I would take offense to things people said. However, my friends knew that I really wanted AKA with all my heart and respected my choice.

[SWEETAKA]

I must agree with my Sorors. I have several friends who are Deltas. We respect each other as strong Black women first and respect the others choice of sorority. There are a few jokes as my Soror stated but there is no disrespect toward the other as a woman. Friends just don't do these things to each other. If one is secure in knowing who one is then there is no need to put another person down to lift oneself up. This is exactly how racism was started. When you are secure in yourself, you don't need others to tell you who or what you are because you already know. So, (famous words) LET IT GO.

[pink bunny]

All jokes aside i think it is important to remember that if how hard someone pledges and is on line is any indication of how committed they will be to their organization then something is terribly wrong because all of the Sororities have thousands of inactive Sorors who can boast of long and difficult intake processes. And As far as Legacies go it is interesting that that is even an issue when most women in each organization were brought to the awareness of our organizations thru older and respected women in their communities or families, whether mother or grandmother is irrelevant, we are all the beneficiaries of their wonderful examples. Any one who just wakes up oneday and says i want to be an AKA or Delta with no real foundation of who these women are is my concern not a legacy who by no doing of their own was born into the priviledged situation of knowing an AKA all her life and still must meet the qualifications of the Sorority. I agree with Sorors that it is their own insecurity that would prompt your friends to bash an organization that they susposedly should have no interest in, i would think their time would be better spent learning the history of the organization that they are in pursuit of instead of trying to convince you that they have made the better choice.

[APRussell1908]

I have to agree with our moderator here. There are comments and there are inappropriate remarks that can offend. I'm not so sure if your friends are in a position to discuss what BGLO does what, who's about business and who's not. They may be just trying to poke fun at you, but this sounds like it's bordering on petty and out of line. My best friend happens to be a member of Delta Sigma Theta, and our jokes don't go beyond color schemes. We respect each other's choice of affiliation because above all else and despite the greek letters, we respect each other as women.

If your friends are making these remarks now, there's no telling how bold they may become in the future. I wouldn't even entertain such talk; keep your focus and be secure in your choice of Sorority.

My nickel and three cents,
APR

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"Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it turned into a butterfly."

[babyface1914]

Wouldn't it be funny if they claim how hard DST pledges bla bla bla, and they drop? It doesn't matter as long as do what it is you have to do. Im not sayin skate but, as long as your heart is there it doesn't matter trust me. the org is bigger than a paddle and a couple of smile swipes.