how do you know when you need help?

[kddani]

I'm having a lot of personal problems right now, i really don't want to go into details. But it's effecting everything in my life.

How do you know when you need to get help? How do you know when it's not just a phase or a mood, but something more serious?

Thanks.

[Heather]

When it goes on for a while. It is one thing to have a rotten day and feel down but it's another when you have felt this way for weeks. (Think of it like the weather, is it one rainy day or is the overall climate rainy?)
When it feels out of control and more than you can handle.
When others notice something is wrong or different or say they are concerned about you.
When it is negatively affecting other areas of your life. (school work, relationships with friends, work, etc.)
If you don't enjoy things that you once liked.
When you find yourself engaging in dangerous or risky activities more than usual or excessive use of drugs and alcohol.
If you have contemplated ending your life.

I'm sure there are more but these were just the ones I thought of off hand.

[James]

Help is ALWAYS a good thing.

I would say a warning sign in your life that you do need advice/help/whatever when a lot is going on is when you wonder if you should seek it.

Burdens are always less if shared.

Seriously

Help isn't a bad word

I need help remembering my own name gorgeous ask away

[winnieb]

I very much agree with Heather---- look at your mood like the weather--does it change--is it just passing --or is the mood sticking around.
If anything mentioned in Heather's post applies-- please get help. Help is not a bad thing. No one has to know you are getting help, unless you decide to tell them.
Help, for you, maybe talking to someone--either professional or personal-- or it can be an antidpressant.
Don't be afraid to talk to your doctor--do you have a regular doctor? They should be able to give you guidance on what would work best in your case.

Good luck---
wendi

[greeklawgirl]

If you've been sad, irritable, sleeping too much or not at all for the last two weeks, then you probably need to see a doctor. Get yourself to a doctor immediately if you have been having suicidal thoughts.

Don't be embarrassed to ask for help! Its the first step back to getting your life back to normal. Please feel free to PM me anytime.

Edited for spelling

[DeltAlum]

Originally posted by James
Help is ALWAYS a good thing.

I would say a warning sign in your life that you do need advice/help/whatever when a lot is going on is when you wonder if you should seek it.

Agree. If things are tough enough that you're asking youself the question, then it's probably time to seek help.

Which is simply another way of saying exactly what James did.

And, what greeklawgirl says is important! I hope you don't feel that bad, but if you do, see someone with some professional training (doctor/psychologist/pastor) right away.

Good luck, and feel better.

[texas*princess]

I could be wrong, but here's my take on it.

If whatever is going on is affecting *every* aspect of your life like you say, maybe that's an indicator that something more serious is going on.

Regardless, even though I don't know what's going on, I truly hope things work out for the best for you

[justamom]

There you have it! Great advice from people who are very knowing.

I'm slower about things like this because I've ALWAYS had a hard time asking for or accepting help...misplaced pride???
I went through what I call a bout of depression. It turned out the house had a gas heater that was malfunctioning and I was home nearly all day, every day sucking up the fumes. Sometimes it can be as simple as that and outside of you. Either way, it was extrememly important to find out WHY for as in this case, the whole house could have blown up! ( I hate gas ovens and heaters!)

If there is anything I can do, feel free to PM me. I may not know jack, but I could help you find someone who does.

[navane]

Often times, seeing a counselor or other mental health professional has stigma attached to it. However, mental health is just like physical health....both need to be taken care of.

From someone with a counseling background, I would encourage you to speak to someone with professional training. A therapist/counselor can help you see things from a different perspective and help you decide what you can do about your life situation.

If you don't have that resource available to you, talk to your pastor, a family member, mentor, or other person you trust.

I am going to go out on a limb here and suggest that, by the fact that you've posted a message on this forum, you are in effect saying that you want to get help.

I think you are courageous for asking about this and hope you will soon be moving in a positive direction.

.....Kelly

[lifesaver]

If my memory servs me correct, you are an alumni (I state that because if you were attending school somewhere, you could go to the campus counseling center). If you live in a town with a medical school, you could call them up and see if they have a residency program you could participate in. Most med schools are like $10 bucks a visit and you are assigned to a resident, and you are their only patient. My sister did this after she graduated.

If you have the medical benefits, try finding a therapist/psychologist your health care plan will pay for. I highly recommend therapy. I describe it as being the only guest on a 1-hour talk show. lol. Seriously, if you got some issues, go for it. You'll be amaized at what a fresh, impartial perspective can do for you. My whole family has been in therapy at one point or another.

I think everyone should be in therapy. The world would be a much happier, patient, tolerant place.

[AXOLiz]

If you think there's a slight chance you need it, go. A therapist will tell you if they don't think you need them, but chances are, if you think you might need help, you could benefit from it.

And what do you have to lose by going once? That's what I told myself, and I've been in therapy for 4 months. If you go once and it does nothing for you, you don't have to go back. If it helps, which it probably will, you've already taken that first step.

[amycat412]

The same feelings coming back again and again is another indicator that you may need objective outside help to get past it.

I start therapy next week and I can't wait. Even just having the appointment makes me feel like I've got things more under control.

I just got tired of constantly feeling overwhelmed and having issues with my mom that we can't seem to work out on our own, etc. Feeling strong enough to reach out and seek the help--that took me awhile to work up to.

[Peaches-n-Cream]

The first few years of early adulthood can be really difficult. Many people in college and after seek professional counseling. There is nothing wrong with that. I did it myself. I figured that my problems weren't going to disappear unless I addressed them so I did. I learned some 'coping skills' to deal with problems that kept popping up. It's not that my problems disappeared, how I viewed these problems and myself changed. I had a new perspective. I also decided that I didn't want to feel that way for the rest of my life so I dealt with these issues in my early twenties. A few months later, I felt a lot better. I hope that everything works out for you.

[juniorgrrl]

Law school could be part of the problem. I know my experience has made me a pretty miserable person.

I'm very close to going to the student health center and having them medicate me up.

[chideltjen]

everyone can benefite from a lil bit of therapy. it's good to get help from someone who can only judge you by what you tell him/her and then will make a decision based on that... as apposed to your best friend that can look at ALL of your wrongdoings and just say it's a phase.
i was criticized by my ex cuz i was having a hard time getting over the break up and wanted to seek therapy. however in therapy, i discovered that the relationship with my ex WAS the real problem.
it can't hurt and you don't have to let the whole world know you are seeing someone.