Letters to Parents?

GmuTeke · #1 08-21-2001, 09:48 AM

I was just wondering if any of you send out letters to the Parents of the New Members when they accept their bid? A current debate is currently going on our email listerv over this.

On the pro side is that we can improve our image to the parentin community, and emphasize our new position on scholarship, activities and more stuff other than drinking.

On the con side is that these new members are adults, and if they want to tell their parents, then good for them, but it should be their decision.

anyone want to kick in their 2 cents?

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The Fraternity of Presidents and Kings: TKE

dzsaigirl · #2 08-21-2001, 10:10 AM

Our advisor sent out a very nice letter to our parents letting them know who she was and what Delta Zeta was all about. I think it was a very good move and it answered a lot of questions that my parents had as well as letting them know that there is an "adult" that is overseeing things.

Depending on the type of school, this also makes parents more likely to pay the dues instead of the members having to work part time to pay their own way. When the parents are supportive, and pay the way, members have more time to participate.

AACAngel · #3 08-21-2001, 10:32 AM

The New Member Educator in every chapter of my GLO sends out such a letter, which first has to be approved. At the chapter I currently advise, the letter usually includes references to our policies on Hazing and substance abuse, an invitation to the Parents' Weekend Reception, and information about Initiation (when it is and how to send flowers/congratulatios if the family wants to). I believe the financial responsibilty of the new member (her, not her parents) is also discussed. It definitely makes a new member's life easier if her parents back her decision to join a sorority and this helps in that process, especially if the parents were not Greek themselves.

AlphaChiGirl · #4 08-21-2001, 01:06 PM

I DEFINITELY think it's a good idea to contact the parents. If they're against the idea of their child going Greek, it may help. If they're supportive, it can only be a positive thing.

Having your child away at college, I imagine, is probably a hard thing. Wouldn't you like a letter from your daughter's new sorority, telling you how happy they are to have her and about the opportunities she'll have as a member?

CutiePie2000 · #5 08-21-2001, 01:24 PM

This is also a good web page... http://www.wlu.ca/~wwwss/greek/parents.htm

it is quite good for parents who might not know anything about Greek Life or who might have all the negative preconceived notions about it...

I think your idea about a letter to parents is a great idea....it will make them feel that they are involved and will hammer home the idea that Greeks realize that their members have family members who love them, care about, etc.

One thing that you might want to consider is the letter might be great for "younger pledges" (age 18-21).....If you have a pledge who is 26 and has been living on their own since age 18, then a letter to the parents might make them feel a bit "babied". So I think it would be wise to take each new member's situation into consideration.

#6 08-21-2001, 03:24 PM

After a girl fills out the registration card prior to Pledge/New Member Service, our chapter advisor usually sends an informational letter to her parents, but only if we get permission from the new member. If a new member says that we can't, then we abide by that decision. It's because of the right to privacy law, but most new members allow us to contact their parents.

Later on during their new membership the sister-moms write a letter of introduction to the parents, as UMJess had said.

finest_alum · #7 08-21-2001, 05:18 PM

We didn't send these out for new members... but I think it would have been nice to have had the option (I definitely agree with OTW, that the NM should give permission). My parents (esp. my mom) still thought pledging involved hazing (which she went through) and really didn't understand the current Greek system. She might have been more interested in my experiences had she received something directly from the Chapter.

UMJess · #8 08-22-2001, 12:21 AM

For us, its required that each Sis-Mom send out a letter to her little's parents telling them a bit about our GLO and our chapter.

TechAPhi · #9 08-23-2001, 05:01 PM

The Texas Tech Chapter of Alpha Phi has a parent's club. When a new member joins, their parents get a letter from the parent's club inviting them to join.

We've found that involving the parents benefits the chapter in innumerable ways. It also makes the parents feel better knowing what their daughter is involved in and seeing all of the positive things the chapter is doing.

We've found that it is a very positive thing all the way around.

Hope that helps!

Jen
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Alpha Phi: Texas Tech's Classic Choice Since 1955
http://www.ttu.edu/~alphaphi