HELP GC'ers!!! I need UF advice!!!!

Aiya · #1 08-22-2002, 02:19 AM

Hey Guys,
So I wanted to do a sorority like year ago, but then I figured it wasn't for me, and I'm getting older (I'm a junior even thought I'm on the 5 year plan) so I figured don't go through rush this year. Plus I went through last year and didn't really feel that connection with a house so I dropped right before prefs. Well over the summer, I've been getting really close with one of my sister's from my non-panhellenic sorority and hanging out with her sisters from her Panhellenic sorority. And I asked her if I should go through rush, because I can totally see myself in their house, and so many girls from her house want me in there. So we decided that it would be best for me to not go through rush and to snap in right after rush, (or do COB, you can see my earlier thread). I didn't want to be subjected to a computer glich (then I get a bid to a house I didn't like and have to be bound to it for a year) or also be really sad when I go though rush and get cut majorly because I'm a junior. I mean I know it's just because I'm older, but it's not fun, especially at my big southern school, to spend most of your time in lounges during rush. Anyways, so my friends and I thought we had it all planned out, UNTIL on sunday, it was made aware to them that they will not be snapping (or COBing, thought I don't think that's the same thing but they seem to think it is) if they make house total and quota during rush (which they will). So my friends called me right when they found that out and tried to get a hold of me to go to the rush orientation so I could go and rush to get into their house, but ALAS, I was tutoring some high school kids and had my cell phone off and was not availible. So I'm not going though rush and apparently I'm not going to be able to get into their house, unless you guys know of another way. I mean I know I can always go to another house and snap there, but I'm just so heartborken about this. It's all because we didn't know to begin with, so it's not like the girls didn't think I would be a good fitm or anything like that. Just a minor technicality. On the lighter side, my friends say I can always come to their open functions and still hang out, which I will, but it's not the same. Oh dear Greek Chat, my friends and I are so sad about this, please send me some advice or PM me if you will,
Thanks,
Alison

AOIIalum · #2 08-22-2002, 07:53 AM

Gosh, Alison, I really don't know what to say to you. I wish I had some great advice and the answer to make things work the way you want it to.

All I can think of is take advantage of your friends' invitations to attend their open functions during the year. With what happened this year at Georgia, I guess we never know what to expect with recruitment

By attending what you can, even more sisters would get to know you. In the event that this chapter wouldn't get quota as expected, or would have total openings through the year, then perhaps you may have a chance to be picked up.

If, as your friends were told, their sorority would not be taking any more new members this year then perhaps this sorority has alumnae initiation. It wouldn't be an immediate answer, but perhaps that way you would be able to one day call your friends your sisters. There's a great thread on alumnae initiation if you'd like to read it sometime: http://130.94.21.174/gcforums/showth...threadid=20287

BTW, snapping or snap bidding is when a chapter extends a bid on bid day. The woman would be part of the new member class and counted toward quota but may or may not have participated in formal recruitment. COB/COR is Continuous Open Bidding or Recruitment. This happens when a sorority is still under quota or campus total and has informal recruitment events during the year. If a sorority has achieved quota **and** is at or over campus total, they may not snap bid or host COR functions. Hope that makes sense! If I got any part of it wrong, someone else out there please correct me!

Christin

kdonline · #3 08-22-2002, 12:19 PM

AOII alum - you got it down right. Esp. the part of there being no "magic answer."

Aiya, take your chances. I know that many girls drop out of pledge classes before initiation (that's within the first month), so chapters are able to get girls who were next on their bid list.

I am not 100% as to how UF does it - been out of touch with it for too long - but sorority rush is a gamble, there are chances you take, decisions to make and you win or you lose.

I'm sorry if it's not the answer you want to hear, but I am trying to be encouraging.

Aiya · #4 08-22-2002, 01:51 PM

Thank you so much for your support! My friends and I are hoping something happens so it works out. We just wanted to make sure we were not over looking some option. At any rate, we are still going to be friends, and if it's meant to be, then it will happen, right?
Thanks again.

violets · #5 08-22-2002, 03:52 PM

Aiya,
Okay, you have an interesting problem. First, I'm really rather uncomfortable with what your friends did to you in regards to promising you a bid when they didn't have the right or authority to do so. I understand your reasons for being uncomfortable about going through formal rush again, but it is set up the way it is for a good reason. It gives everyone a chance of seeing each and every house and the sisterhoods that reside within them. I understand that you have been at school a little longer than your typical pnm, and that you have your heart set on a specific chapter, but I do believe that amazing things can happen during formal rush, minds and hearts can be changed, and women end up where they never thought they would but were always meant to be. I'm at odds with the fact that your group of friends kept you out of that experience by promising a COB that is now nonexistent.
All right, enough talk about how great formal rush is and onto some talk of resolving your problem.
First, although you have your heart set on one and only one chapter, let me make it clear that all the chapters at UF have unique and special sisterhoods. The bond that you see between your friends in the one chapter you like is, I'm sure, also evident at other sororities at UF. Therefore if you have a chance to go to a COB event at any sorority this fall definitely give it a chance.
In addition you will read on other UF posts that Delta Zeta sorority is colonizng at UF this year. From what I've read from other UF pnms going through recruitment, the DZ presentation was fantastic. Delta Zeta is an extremely well regarded national organization with a reputation for very strong colonizations. Their IHQ gives enormous support to new chapters. This is an amazing opportunity to enter into a sisterhood and shape it from the ground up. I'm certain they will be attracted to mature and motivated women to help them get started, I cannot imagine how exciting this would be!
So my advice is again, to keep your mind and eyes open to all the options when it comes to participating in Greek Life. If other chapters do COB events, try them out. If Delta Zeta does more events, go and meet them.
I hope you do and I hope you find someplace where you can contribute.
Fraternally,
violets

DeltaBetaBaby · #6 08-22-2002, 04:36 PM

Wow, that was great advice from Violets!

sweetie adpi · #7 08-22-2002, 07:07 PM

violets, you rock!

aiya, i'm sorry there was this mix-up, and i really hope that you find a way (though it might not be the way you expected ) to become a part of npc greek life... i'm sure you would be an amazing sister

theta sig agd · #8 08-22-2002, 08:08 PM

Ditto to what violets said. I also went through formal recruitment and did not feel "at home" at any of the other houses. Then Alpha Gamma Delta came on campus and I went to check it out.

WOW! What an experience! I was/am a charter sister of my chapter and there is nothing like it in the world! It would definitely be a good thing to check DZ out! Not everyone gets this opportunity.

Also, I was a soph turing into a Junior when I was a new member. New colonies usually doing really look at the class status , they want a well rounded chapter to start out with and that includes Juniors and Seniors. Remember sisterhood is for a lifetime not just 4 years. They would be more willing to acknowledge that.

Good luck, and let us know what you decide!!

Aiya · #9 08-30-2002, 01:53 PM

Ok, so I went to the house on wed for dinner and met so many girls. They haven't decided if they might take a couple snaps, that will be decided this week, but they are considering it, which is better than the earlier decision of no snaps what so ever. Exec said though that the sisters should bring other girls by the house this week, and when they have made their decision, they will know who to give bids to etc. So I'm wishing and hoping. On the positive side, I went with my friends and a bunch of their sisters on monday night to swamp and had a fabulous time. I really got along with so many of them and alot of older girls told my friend that they really liked me without her even asking. So we went to dinner on wed and afterwards we just hung around and talked and it felt like such an awesome place to be. On the other side though, if this house dosen't work out, then I'm going to try to be one of the girls that goes to the Delta Zeta colonization. That in itself is an awesome opportunity as well, and one of my sisters in SAI wants to do that too, so what ever happens happens. I mean I'm treasurer this year of SAI, which is a national organization, so I can see how my experience with that and other things that come with being an upperclassman could totally help DZ get off the ground. All and all, I've done alot of thinking and I'm excited for whatever is going to happen! I'll be pleased with both choices!

violets · #10 09-01-2002, 05:29 PM

Aiya,
I'm so glad you posted the update on your situation. I'm so glad to see that things are working out for you. As far as the DZ colonization, I think your experience in SAI would be a wonderful asset. I think you would really enjoy being in a NPC org, so I'm happy to see you pursuing all the options.
Good luck and keep us updated!
violets

Aiya · #11 11-21-2002, 07:02 PM

well I went through the DZ thingy, but after my interview I decided that I don't have time for one more activity. I'm already super involved in SAI and I'm pursuing an opera career through the college of fine arts, so I don't really have time and I need to put the money that would have gone to DZ towards other things, like paying for audition fees, my accompianist, private dance and acting lessons in other cities, you know. Oh well! I still hang out with all my Panhellenic friends and go on plenty of date functions etc. Flash knows who I am.