Maid of Honor Duties

XO_Princess · #1 05-14-2002, 10:16 PM

Ok ya'll-if anyone can help me out here, I'd really appreciate it. I'm the maid of honor in a friend's wedding, and I have no idea what my "duties" are. I think I have to plan a bachlorette party-and the wedding shower?? When do I have to give a toast? I've never been in a wedding before, much less maid of honor, and I have no idea what to do. Thanks guys!

LexiKD · #2 05-14-2002, 10:31 PM

There is a great book on your duties...I will look it up and get back to you.

I would say you are on the right track...the toast would be at dinner before the meal most of the time....party and shower also are up to you, but ask the others to help! The day of you are her right hand woman, you get to do it all and then some!

I'll get back to you about the book!

Are the dresses nice?

CutiePie2000 · #3 05-14-2002, 10:33 PM

Go to www.theknot.com
It is a great resource.

XO_Princess · #4 05-14-2002, 10:37 PM

The dresses aren't bad-her colors are silver and hunter green, and she's letting us wear whatever color we want, and whatever style dress we want!! No ugly pink tafetta, thank god.

G8Ralphaxi · #5 05-14-2002, 11:33 PM

I was my friend amy's maid of honor last year - it's a lot of work but totally worth it to play such a big role in the wedding of a good friend.

you are in charge of a shower and bachelorette party, but you can certainly enlist the other bridesmaids to help you. There may also be a shower hosted by one of her relatives, where her mom's friends and female relatives will come. That one will likely be more formal, so have fun with yours. I had mine on the back porch of my parent's house, played music, had games, etc. Pretty simple food - fruit, veggie trays, homemade brownies and cookies, punch, coke. All pretty easy and I got my little brother and parents to help. My uncle manages some nurseries so he brought me LOTS of roses and I put them all over the room - fresh flowers really dress up a room. I also tacked up streamers and balloons - really inexpensive but pretty.

Go to your library and check out books for free instead of buying one.

Also don't be surprised if you are entrusted with holding important stuff on the big day - i had to hold the ring for amy's husband ALL DAY long on my thumb PLUS her engagement ring on my finger. i was scared to death i was going to lose something. I also smoothed out her skirt after her father gave her away and held her bouquet during the ring exchange.

The best man traditionally gives the wedding toast, but you may get to say a few words too. I was there when Amy met her future husband, so I told the story and gave them a nice little toast right before their first dance.

There, I think that's all - except the biggest job of all - giving lots of hugs and a listening ear when the poor bride is stressing out AGAIN and AGAIN. You're the designated emotional support.

FuzzieAlum · #6 05-15-2002, 12:00 PM

Showers should NEVER be hosted by relatives of the bride!!!

SigmaChiCard · #7 05-15-2002, 12:04 PM

According to many movies and what-have-you that I've seen, I think one primary duty of yours would be to sleep with the groom. haha. just joking

shultzz · #8 05-15-2002, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SigmaChiCard
According to many movies and what-have-you that I've seen, I think one primary duty of yours would be to sleep with the groom. haha. just joking

ditto, but I am not joking.

AOIIBrandi · #9 05-15-2002, 04:55 PM

Everybody has pretty much mentioned everything, but MAKE SURE the marriage Liscence (sp??) is signed, sealed, and delivered. When I was MOH for my friend we forgot till the next day. Luckily in GA witnesses don't have to sign - I guess, we never found a place to sign...

aephi alum · #10 05-15-2002, 07:02 PM

As maid of honor, you are the bride's right-hand "man" on the wedding day. If the photographer or caterer has a problem, s/he should go to you or the best man, not to the bride and groom. The bride and groom are stressed out enough

and part of your job is to make sure they can enjoy their day and focus on each other and the life they're starting together, not on whether the little lamb chops are warm enough.

You should take the lead in planning a shower and/or bachelorette party; the other bridesmaids should help. Ask the bride what she'd prefer... a dinner out, a visit to a Chippendales show, an afternoon tea, etc. Showers are never given by the bride's relatives, but since you're a friend, you're ok on that score.

During the ceremony, you may have to help the bride keep from tripping over her train

and you will probably hold her bouquet as well as your own. You may be asked to sign the marriage certificate as a witness - depending on what state you're in. If it's a religious ceremony, there may be a marriage document that you may be asked to sign as well.

During the reception, you can give a toast if you wish. You will probably also dance with the best man. You may also be asked to keep half an eye on the gift table, or keep track of important items (rings, marriage certificate), etc.

HTH

ChiOJenn78 · #11 05-15-2002, 07:29 PM

Thanks so much for the advice, ya'll!! (This is XO_Princess, by the way-I just changed my screename). I'm so excited to be her MOH now!

SigkapAlumWSU · #12 05-16-2002, 01:58 AM

I have a question. I was MOH for one friend, and now I am MOH for my best friend. For the first one we had a shower with all her mom's friends and hers, then a bachlorette party with just her close friends (more party than anything). What's the difference, who should be invited, and why are there two?

KillarneyRose · #13 05-16-2002, 12:53 PM

I know this post should be in the Cool Sites forum, but since this is a wedding-related thread I decided to put it here. It's a bunch of wedding etiquette breeches people have sent in - HILARIOUS (if somewhat disturbing)!

http://www.etiquettehell.com/wedindex.htm

AOX81 · #14 05-16-2002, 01:11 PM

Well my best friend doesn't know it yet but next week her man is going to pop the big question.

He called and told my husband a couple of nights ago...and of course my husband told me. If we would have taken bets I would have won because I told my husband a couple of months ago "I bet you when they go on vacation he is going to ask her."

I've already been told that I am going to be her MOH and I'm really excited!! I'm already married so I know all the problems that can and will go wrong. One of my other good friends is getting married next June and I'm going to be in her wedding also...just a bridesmaid.

It's so funny how they keep asking me questions...maybe I should be a wedding consultant.

If you have anymore questions just PM me and I'd be more than happy to help out!