I don't want to be a ABC anymore... WTH?

AKA2D '91 · #1 02-12-2002, 09:27 PM

What do you all think makes someone not want to be a member of the organization they belong to anymore? I don't mean, only becoming INACTIVE, but removing yourself TOTALLLY from the organization.

Is there EVER a situation or event that would warrant such a decision?

I just cannot see it.

AKAtude · #2 02-12-2002, 09:59 PM

I knew a soror that "removed" herself from my undergrad chapter for a while. All I know is that it had to do with religion and a guy she was engaged to.

However, they broke up and she was back 100% the following year.

CrimsonTide4 · #3 02-12-2002, 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AKAtude
I knew a soror that "removed" herself from my undergrad chapter for a while. All I know is that it had to do with religion and a guy she was engaged to. However, they broke up and she was back 100% the following year.

From what I have observed or been privy to in the past, a lot of folks who totally disassociate themselves from the sisterhood or brotherhood do so because they believe that it goes against religious doctrine. Some believe that we are cults

and that our "rituals" are paganistic. Some believe that we are practicing the worship of idols due to our valuation of symbols, colors, etc.

Ultimately, I see nothing in Delta that goes against the Bible. Delta, as all of the orgs do, seeks to practice sisterhood/brotherhood, service and scholarship. God teaches us to love our neighbors/brothers/sisters as ourselves. He teaches us to help others. He also wants us to be smart. So as far as their being a conflict, again I see none but I do know some ministers who "TWIST" the word of God to be against our orgs as well as other "modern inventions".

snuggles12 · #4 02-13-2002, 12:12 AM

"far as their being a conflict, again I see none but I do know some ministers who "TWIST" the word of God to be against our orgs as well as other "modern inventions". [/B][/QUOTE]

As far as being a Christian, the principles/foundation of Delta do not go against the Bible. I never understood Greeks who disavowed their organization because it is not Christian or is idol worship. My philosophy is that anything can become an idol (i.e., your job, your love for money, sex, TV,, internet).

And the ministers who think that being an a Greek organization is not biblical are not members and do not understand the organization.

#7 Snuggles
DST - 12/93

skywalker20_99 · #5 02-13-2002, 10:52 AM

A college acquaintance of mine was rumored to have written to her organization's national headquarters to "turn in" her membership. Because of some very painful situations (both emotionally and physical) that she experienced at the hands of her sorors both during and after pledging, she decided that she no longer wanted to be part of the organization. I thought it was sad, because she was both a scholar and a role model, and probably would have been a great asset to the organization as a whole. We all know that you are supposed to look at the bigger picture (the national organization), but I think her chapter experiences were so painful for her that she didn't want to be associated with the organization at all.

Kisha · #6 02-13-2002, 11:33 AM

I know someone personally who disassociated herself from the sisterhood because of her experiences on line.

One person on her line suffered VERY SERIOUS injuries, to the point where everyone on line was paid by the grand chapter to keep their mouth shut about the incident and promise not to bring suit against the sisterhood. Needless to say, everyone took the money and the injured person never returned back to school.

None of the women who crossed that year are active.

AKA2D '91 · #7 02-13-2002, 12:14 PM

Let's stay away from that Religious aspect. I don't understand that either as a justification.

I think we've gone down the religion/greek street before.

I mean c'mon, you turn in your membership because you sustained...I don't get it! You made the choice to allow a,b, or c to occur, then you say you don't want it? Something isn't right....

Ideal08 · #8 02-13-2002, 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AKA2D '91
Let's stay away from that Religious aspect. I don't understand that either as a justification. I think we've gone down the religion/greek street before.

I mean c'mon, you turn in your membership because you sustained...I don't get it! You made the choice to allow a,b, or c to occur, then you say you don't want it? Something isn't right....

Well, from my experience, I know people who are just bitter about their process. There is a point where there is no turning back, so the only choice is to sustain. And I won't go into any detail about that, but yall (Greeks) know what I mean. I know a person who is so bitter about the divisiveness w/i the organization, coupled with her process, that she has no desire to be active within her org.

What I DON'T understand is how, exactly, one turns in their membership. The way I understand it, once an AKA, ALWAYS an AKA.

While I may be able to understand some people's reasons for being inactive for a time, I just don't agree with simply REMAINING inactive FOREVER (or removing your name or whatever). I just don't agree with that. In my opinion, you made a pledge (oath, etc.), KEEP IT!!! I still harbor some bitterness about some stuff from time to time, but you get over it, and you MOVE ON!

AKA2D '91 · #9 02-13-2002, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ideal08

I know a person who is so bitter about the divisiveness w/i the organization, that she has no desire to be active within her org.

Now, I can see being bitter about a process...

But this other part up there, I can't even get with.

I mean has she been on EVERY level of the organization and ACTIVELY participated in the bizness of her organization on the local, regional, and International levels?

Or was this just an EXCUSE to "get out"?

I don't see it. I'm starting to get more involved locally and regionally, and I don't see it...I cannot see where someone with that frame of reference is coming from.

Ideal08 · #10 02-13-2002, 04:40 PM

Soror 2D, I agree with you, I don't see it either, but she did. So much so that she doesn't even greet her sorors when she sees them because of how she is treated after they find out how she was made. But I also think that it is just where she lives, because I've never experienced anything like that. As far as I can tell, ain't nobody on it all like that. However, try and put yourself in that person's shoes. If EVERY soror that you met in your area turned their nose up at you (RIGHT after you crossed), how willing would you be to go to ANY events or work with ANY of these women? I know if that had been my experience, I would have completely re-thought my decision. Because really, you don't know what you're getting yourself into until you are in, you know what I'm sayin? And then to have such negative experiences RIGHT AFTER crossing, what, exactly, would make you WANT to remain active? Unless you move? And who's moving to find a better chapter?

Now, my opinion on the mess? The ladies (and I use the term loosely) turning their noses up at her probably aren't even active. Because you tell me, who is turning away people who are willing to work w/i the chapter???? And this gets kinda off the subject of this thread, and onto the other thread that you started, BUT, it is all a part of why people are inactive or choose to disassociate themselves from the organization. If you are not being treated SISTERly by your SISTERS, why would you want to be a part of the SISTERhood? I understand that everyone is NOT going to like you, but come on, now, you can still be sisterly.

Basically, everyone's experiences are different, and most often the differences are regional. But that's just my take on it.

AKA2D '91 · #11 02-13-2002, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ideal08
. However, try and put yourself in that person's shoes. If EVERY soror that you met in your area turned their nose up at you (RIGHT after you crossed), how willing would you be to go to ANY events or work with ANY of these women?

You don't know me berry well, do you?

She probably shouldn't have been chosen anyway!

On that other stuh, you are right!

Rain Man · #12 02-14-2002, 10:16 PM

Please read the following:

January 29, 2002

Patrick W. Burke
National Executive Director
Alpha Phi Omega National Service Fraternity
14901 E. 42nd Street
Independence, MO 64055

Dear Pat,

I am writing to you to inform you that I wish to renounce my vows I took to be a brother of Alpha Phi Omega, and therefore ask that my membership numbers be taken off the rolls (Member #238281 and Life Member #17092). Thus, I wish to dissociate with the Fraternity.

This was by no means an easy decision to make, as it took over a year to deliberate to come to this decision. While I have enjoyed my time as a brother of Alpha Phi Omega, it has become painfully obvious over the last three to four years that because I pledged Alpha Phi Omega in a manner similar to that of historically Black fraternities and sororities, I have received a much lesser degree of respect and worth as a brother by those who pledged under more “traditional” conditions, despite the fact that I saw everyone as a brother irrespective of their personal status.

I have attempted to help bridge the gap between brothers at mainstream schools and those at Historically Black Colleges and Universities (HBCUs), through education and discussion, but few, if any brothers were willing to listen or receive such. As such, I am a brother in a culturally divided fraternity, where there is no possibility for compromise, and brothers embrace groupthink in the name of diversity. While I believe in the cardinal principles of leadership, friendship, and service, I cannot serve in an organization under these conditions.

An additional reason for my dissociation is the fact that my spiritual convictions have made me grow increasingly uncomfortable with being in a brotherhood bond with atheists and homosexuals.

I would like to thank you and all the brother of Alpha Phi Omega for 10 great years of leadership, friendship, and service. I have learned a lot, and hope to take the positive experiences I learned to another level soon.

Sincerely,

Jason M. Jones

Note: while I did have a phone conversation with Pat and technically I am still on the membership rolls of APO, I no longer identify myself as such (you may have noticed the lack of APO referencing and related topics I have posted over the 10 months). I gave all my 'nalia to a fellow brother and will put all my GLO energy into building Beta Kappa Lambda Fraternity in the future.

Just my $.25, oops, I mean 2 cents

Since Rain Man is not a line name or GLO related name, I will keep that.

RM

Penny_2 · #13 02-14-2002, 10:42 PM

Hello Sisterfriends and Memberfriends of all BGLOs. I've been a silent observer for over a year now

but I felt compelled to reply to this topic.

The other day, I was talking to my aunt and told her of my interest in XYZ sorority. She became furious with me for wanting to join any sorority! I hadn't seen her that mad since I was a little girl. Anyway, I talked to her later after she had calmed down, only to find out that my AUNT was a member of XYZ sorority. Mind you, we are very close, so this came as a shock to me.

Although she hadn't gone to the extent of Rain Man's reply, my aunt has basically disassociated herself with the sorority. My auntie was very vague as to her reasons, but I was under the impression that it had more to do with pledging experiences than religious reasons.

DST Love · #14 02-15-2002, 10:34 AM

skywalker20_99, I'm not sure if you ever mentioned this elsewhere but what college did you attend?

AKA_Monet · #15 02-15-2002, 11:48 PM

IMHO, there IS no reason to turn your pin in upon taking your oath to the organization you choose to join!!!

With that being said, I have seen "others" in organizations that have ostracized certain members 'cuz they came thru one way or another. When I saw the challenging, the tests, the neglect, the resentment, the hurt, the anger hurled at these members, not to mention that it IS hazing as defined by the NPHC, it broke my heart... But no one ever told these folks to remember what was the "REASONS" why they joined... And those reasons change from time to time, chapter to chapter and life circumstances to livelihood...

Remember, why do folks leave the Church, Mosque, Temple or Shrine?

Maybe 'cuz we live in a pluralistic society and several folks died so that some folks can BE flaky like dat... I dunno...

I think we can all say that our committment to some things are extremely limited... Just look at the Untied States divorce rates... Look at the increases in children caught up into the foster care system 'cuz their folks wanted other thangs... Shoot, if a mamma cain't be committed to her child, then dayum, how can we ask someone be committed to our organizations?

Which leaves me to leap and bound to the fact, that all the HBGLO's in the NPHC were formed during a time of oppression and that our relevance is being tested today by the mere fact of how all of our intake processes have had to change...

So some ippy dippy interest rolls upto us half-baked and makes MIP (today as required by Nationals) then flakes out and turns in her 'nalia 'cuz she wasn't strong enuf relative to our foremothers... Then... What??? Maybe, IMHO, we need to do our own private investigations and research bout flossy assed negroes... 'Cuz I'm tired of the faked funkers! It's time to find those who can step... Hopefully UP!