Too young for a sorority?

AchtungBaby80 · #1 02-25-2002, 06:42 PM

My friend (from another school) has a 14/15-year-old sister who was supposedly being homeschooled up until this semester. (I say supposedly because she hardly ever seemed to be doing any work!) Over the holidays, she decided she wanted to go to the local university, the one that my friend goes to. Since that university's admission policy basically only requires that you be a living, breathing human, she got in. Welllll...since then, she's been partying a lot and recently she mentioned something to me about wanting to join a sorority. In fact, she told me that one certain sorority had already bid her. I don't think she's joined yet, but just for my peace of mind, do you think any sorority would actually allow members that young? It just seems so strange to me! True, that campus has only local sororities, I'm pretty sure, so they may do things differently. I hear they party A LOT--which I've been to a few parties up there and that seems to be the case. I'm just scared that this girl is going to get in over her head...she's hanging around college-age people, and she isn't even old enough to drive yet! She's a really nice kid, though, and that's why I'm a little worried. I can't just go up to her parents and be all, "Hello, are you CRAZY?" They don't really seem to be that concerned about what she does, so it pretty much falls on my friend (her brother) to watch her but that doesn't make me feel any better!

So anyway, what do you all think about this?

SAEalumnus · #2 02-25-2002, 06:50 PM

Since the sororities are apparently all local, I don't know if the same rules would apply to them as would to national organizations, but that still doesn't mean it's a good idea. I wouldn't personally bid a 14/15 year old unless that person was some kind of prodigy. Then again, in the history of my fraternity, some of the most notable and well-thought-of alumni (i.e. Bunting Brothers, etc.) were young when they joined. Of course, this was in the mid to late 1800s at the time. These days it probably wouldn't work quite as well.

AchtungBaby80 · #3 02-25-2002, 06:55 PM

Oops, I forgot to mention that even though I love this girl, she 1) isn't exactly a prodigy, and 2) she seems to think Greek life is all about partying. She grew up in another country, so she wasn't exposed to it much until she came here, and then the example set by the groups at that university probably isn't the best.

GreekLetterGirl · #4 02-25-2002, 06:59 PM

ok I know that we had a situation like this in my house.. there was an awesome girl that we liked but she was 17, we couldn't bid her due to insurance reasons/ liablity so I think that no national sorority woudl be her for that reason but I mean if she is a local then I don't know what their policy... also it is sad that she sees greeks only as party animals when rather that is NOT what we are about.. sure we all go out and have fun but honestly does she think that there would be 150+ year old organizations that are based on Partying? I wish her the best of luck and please keep us posted

BrandiDZ · #5 02-25-2002, 07:03 PM

My chapter has bid many 17 year old girls. I really cant see us going any younger though. These 17 year olds had either skipped a grade or had really late birthdays, so they were about the same maturity level as the 18 year old girls. 16 and younger just sounds too young.

FuzzieAlum · #6 02-25-2002, 07:43 PM

We had a member who joined at the age of 16. She had a regular h.s. diploma and graduated from college in two years and went to law school at 18. She didn't work out for the sorority, although not because she was immature and partied too much. She just spent so much time on her classes that she didn't have enough left for the chapter.

I don't think the age HAS to be a problem - it depends on the girl. Especially if she was home schooled she may have been more sheltered than most teenagers and is now doing the "I'm on my own and I'm going to have fun and do what my parents didn't want me to" thing that _lots_ of freshmen do, home-schooled or not.

So I think her maturity, not her age, is cause for concern. Although it's hardly unusual for a 14 or 15 year old to be less mature than an 18 year old.

aephi alum · #7 02-25-2002, 08:19 PM

I pledged when I was 17, without a problem. I don't see a problem with bidding a mature 17- or even 16-year-old. I wouldn't go any younger than that, though.

brownsugakdphi · #8 02-25-2002, 08:31 PM

Hey Everyone!!!! Representing alpha Kappa Delta Phi!
Well, I was a 17 year old freshman when I pledged my sorority, however I don't believe this experience can be one applied to everyone. Pledging regardless of age is something to be taken seriously and really depends on the person. Through my two and a half years of being an Active member, I have seen some 21 year olds with less drive than 17 or 18 year olds. I believe that this girl seems to be misled from your description, and regardless of her age, that needs to be your main concern in giving her a bid. However, in the future if a 15/16 year old presents a strong enough desire, sense of knowledge, and sense of direction, who are you to say that he/she can't handle pledging... Perhaps your strongest member may also be your youngest member... For reference, I was an 18 year old President of my chapter... That just shows you that AGE AIN'T NOTHIN BUT A NUMBER!
In eternal Love and Friendship!
Brown Suga

KillarneyRose · #9 02-25-2002, 10:01 PM

I am pretty sure National Security Advisor Condeleeza Rice joined Alpha Chi Omega when she was only 15 or 16 but from what I have heard, she was indeed a prodigy. More often than not, a 14 or 15 year old simply wouldn't fit into a college sorority. She'd simply be too young.

Wow, going from homeschooling to college at 15 with visions of parties dancing in her head. Talk about going from the frying pan into the fire!

maggieaxid · #10 02-25-2002, 10:47 PM

We had a girl who was 16 when she pledged (she had lived in other countries and had a normal hs. diploma, but she didn't even have her drivers liscense yet!) but it worked out really bad for her. While she clicked with lots of her pledge sisters who were 17 and up, she had trouble bonding with the older sisters. By the end of her sophmore year she ended up "de-sistering", mostly because she didn't want to follow the sororities rules and regs about drinking and stuff like that. She also never wanted to do anything but PARTY. I think, in the end, she never graduated from college.

From this experience, I just don't think that some 16 years olds are in the right mindset to join an organization.

dzsaigirl · #11 02-25-2002, 11:37 PM

We have pledged several 16 year olds (including one of my littles) and it hasn't been a problem. The thing is that you have to evaluate each person as an individual. For instance, I have met lots of 18 year olds that were way less mature than some 16 year olds...it all depends.

AchtungBaby80 · #12 02-25-2002, 11:58 PM

I figure the best thing to do is try and "educate" her about sororities. She doesn't seem to know anything about them except for the fact that they wear letters and drink (not all--I'm talking about the ones at her school!), and even though I really like the girl, I do not think she would want to join one if she knew the commitment involved. That isn't her fault, though. I don't think her brother is very active in his fraternity, except when the kegs come out (that makes him sound bad, but he's really not), so that's probably where she gets a lot of her ideas. She just seems very naive to me, and I'm afraid she's going to get into trouble. I just think the whole situation is a little bizarre (she should be going to the prom, for crying out loud, not to university!), but that's just me.

TriSigmaTX · #13 02-26-2002, 12:26 AM

I have recently worked with a chapter that pledged a girl who was 15. Tri Sigma has no rules or age limits. That would be considered discrimination. Anyway, this girl lived in Arkansas and went to school there...she was very smart intellectually, and graduated H.S. in 2 1/2 years. She went to college, pledged and became Recruitment Director her sophomore year. She was 16 then, partying some, going to school...doing ok, but that year it just hit her. She missed Prom, she missed her friends and felt out of place. So, she went back home and said she'd be back in college when she was a little older. The pressure just got to her.

SparkliiQTMTSU · #14 02-26-2002, 01:08 AM

well Im 17 now and had I gone to school as soon as I graduated I might have pledged at 16 but I waited before going to school. I don't find anything wrong with pledging anyone thats like 16 or 17. 15 may be a bit young but they can be pretty mature too. I know a 15 yr old thats very mature. but then again it all depends. it may be harder for someone younger than 16 b/c of not being able to drive and things like that but other than that I dont see anything wrong with it.

nichole

satellitegrl · #15 02-26-2002, 03:11 AM

True one may make the comment that age is just a number and yes thats all it is...but maturity has everything to do with it.

You cant distcriminate on age , but I think a certain level of life experience is needed before one really understands the coolness (hehehe ok) of sisterhood. At 15 and homeschooled, reguardless of all the partying she does know to catch up, she doesn't have enough social skills or any concept of social responsiblity.

And if she is attending college so early academics should be her main concern...not a social life...

Besides all this...how does anyone our age relate to a 15 year old? Plus I wonder how her mother feels since she still is responible for her as a minor.