Going through recruitment again as a sophomore

[younglion4]

..

[33girl]

If those are the only two chapters participating in informal, it means they are under total, and barring something freakish like a ton of December graduates or half the chapter quitting, they most likely didn't achieve quota and total at formal rush. They were under total and you didn't get a bid. This means they do not want to give you a bid.

How long did you stay with the group you got a bid from during formal? Did you drop out right away or actually try to get into it?

[WhiteRose1912]

Originally Posted by 33girl

They were under total and you didn't get a bid. This means they do not want to give you a bid.

She wasn't eligible to receive a bid from them by the time informal rolled around. Things might have gone differently if she were able to rush them--informal is a different beast than formal--but she wasn't able to do so.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by WhiteRose1912

She wasn't eligible to receive a bid from them by the time informal rolled around. Things might have gone differently if she were able to rush them--informal is a different beast than formal--but she wasn't able to do so.

My point is that I doubt they would be participating in informal if their numbers hadn't been on the low side to begin with.

[DubaiSis]

They bid to quota plus quota additions during formal rush. The chapters don't choose how many girls they can offer bus to; the RFM process does, with the goal being that every chapter makes quota and total. But none of that is your concern.

You had a bad rush. The only way to expect a different outcome is to change something about yourself. And I don't buy being from out of state was the problem. So sit down with yourself and really think about what happened. How are your grades? How are your conversation skills? Are you weird? Were you dressed appropriately? Do you have friends in sororities now? Do you think you're funny but nobody else does? Are you a slob?

Whatever it is, get on fixing that now and possibly you will have a better outcome next year.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

You had a bad rush. The only way to expect a different outcome is to change something about yourself. And I don't buy being from out of state was the problem. So sit down with yourself and really think about what happened. How are your grades? How are your conversation skills? Are you weird? Were you dressed appropriately? Do you have friends in sororities now? Do you think you're funny but nobody else does? Are you a slob?

Whatever it is, get on fixing that now and possibly you will have a better outcome next year.

While it's not SEC-sized by any means, 650 is still a lot of women, and it's possible to be "fine" but just not stand out or be memorable in any way. Have you made friends with women who are in chapters (and real friendships, not just trying to suck up to them)? I'm not that familiar with U of M, but I have been involved at other Big 10 schools, and I think knowing sorority women is one of the biggest keys to having a successful recruitment as a sophomore.

Also, you are going to have to let go of your "top chapter" and approach recruitment with a totally open mind.

[Katmandu]

I have nothing against the members of the house, all were incredibly sweet and genuine

Hindsight, particularly for someone who is 18/19, is challenging, but your opening 2 sentences should give you a lot of material on which to reflect. You say you "didn't fit" into this group, and then say "all were incredibly sweet and genuine."

So, either you are sour and fake (the opposite of sweet and genuine), or "didn't fit" is code for "I think I am better than they are" for whatever reason--looks, weight, personality, party-attitudes, "tier" status on campus.

The reality is you did not receive a bid from your top group and you dropped long before you could get a true feel for the group that did invite you to join. Rushing again may or may not lead to a different outcome, but you should take an honest look at your own attitudes to give re-rushing the best chance of being successful. Being out of state in this day and age is pretty meaningless.

[DubaiSis]

I chose to skip past the euphemisms, but we all know what she meant. Nobody ever dropped out of a sorority because the girls were too cool, pretty, connected or fun for them. She felt like she got dumped into the leftovers pile and chose not to make the best of it. And somehow the 9 chapters who found her not quite up to snuff will this year be TOTALLY ON BOARD with her awesomeness.

[Katmandu]

^^^^ Yes, indeedy.

[AZTheta]

It is not unheard of to receive a bid as a sophomore after having accepted a bid and then dropping as a freshman. However I can only speak about this from very limited personal experience at two West coast schools. I don't presume to know what's happening at UM.

The important thing is that if you do go through next Fall, you are on your very best behavior at ALL chapters, including the one you dropped out of; believe me that sorority women talk to one another. You will be friendly and classy especially at that chapter that you left after one week. You have the rest of this semester to polish yourself, get a great GPA, and make yourself as attractive as possible (not just physically attractive, but all-around attractive) to ALL chapters. Because you'll be competing with incoming freshmen who have clean slates.

I will refer you to colonization threads here on GC and ask my Phi Mu Panhell sisters to confirm or deny that there is a colonization next fall, I'm too lazy to look it up.

Good luck to you!

[amIblue?]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

I chose to skip past the euphemisms, but we all know what she meant. Nobody ever dropped out of a sorority because the girls were too cool, pretty, connected or fun for them. She felt like she got dumped into the leftovers pile and chose not to make the best of it. And somehow the 9 chapters who found her not quite up to snuff will this year be TOTALLY ON BOARD with her awesomeness.

I do know one woman that I grew up with who got a bid at Tennessee to what was considered a "top" chapter her freshman year. It was the kind of chapter that girls would cut a b to get into at the time. Beautiful and cool girls, mixers with all the right fraternities. She depledged and later was initiated into a chapter that wasn't quite as competitive to get into later. So it can happen, but I really think that she's more like a unicorn than anything, but it does happen.

[WhiteRose1912]

Younglion4, the worst thing that could happen if you rush is you don't get a bid, which is coincidentally the only possible outcome if you don't rush at all. We can conjecture all we want, but no one could possibly predict how well you will do if you rush again. We can only offer suggestions on how to possibly have a better outcome, such as making friends within the sororities, getting involved, boosting your GPA, etc.

Something that concerns me is you mentioned you are a junior by credits. That could've been a big reason why you were dropped. Did you mention in the rounds that you were technically a junior/sophomore by credits but would still be attending for x years?

[robinseggblue]

Originally Posted by younglion4

I will be deleting/editing this. I am not finding this to be as helpful as I thought it might be. It has discouraged me to attempt to become Greek.

Just FYI, you cannot delete/edit posts you've made that other posters have quoted.

[AZTheta]

Originally Posted by robinseggblue

Just FYI, you cannot delete/edit posts you've made that other posters have quoted.

BUT you can politely ask those who've quoted you to delete their QFPs. I think this OP is hurting and upset and I think she regrets her behavior.

[younglion4]

Originally Posted by ComradesTrue

So you would be easy to identify when you rush again?

Would it be possible for you to please delete this? I understand that it may have already done its damage. I have deleted all other posts of mine in this forum. Thank you for the consideration.