Is it a faux pas to mention legacies during rush?

CaseyBat · #1 07-16-2013, 03:25 PM

My mom's sorority has a chapter at my school. I am not dead set on this chapter, but I am already leaning towards it because a) my mom and I were very close, and it would mean so much to me to be her sister. And b) I have researched this sorority's philanthropy, and their cause is something I'm very interested in. I have actually volunteered for their organization in the past.

Is it a faux pas to mention either of these things? I don't want anyone to think I am conceited because I'm a legacy.

DubaiSis · #2 07-16-2013, 03:36 PM

They should be advised prior to rush through a legacy form. If your Mom is deceased (did we learn that on an earlier thread?), then hopefully one of her sisters/friends can submit something on her behalf. It would be fine to mention it during rush, but don't dwell on it. Definitely do NOT talk about it with other chapters; it can be just the reason they need to cut you. And do understand that being a legacy is not an automatic in. By a long shot. In most cases I've ever heard (but each sorority functions under their own rules so it can vary), you will get invited back to round 2 and if you make it to preference, they have to put you on their first bid list. But that doesn't mean they can't/won't cut you after round 2 or 3. Legacy status is just one piece of a very big puzzle.

CaseyBat · #3 07-16-2013, 03:48 PM

Yes, she is deceased. Of course, I don't think my legacy status will guarantee me a bid. I just want the sisters to know that being in their sorority would mean a lot to me, maybe more than the average legacy. But on the other hand, I don't want them to think I am pushing a sob story to gain sympathy.

I think I'll be sincere, but keep to my comments about the situation to a minimum.

AXOrushadvisor · #4 07-16-2013, 05:41 PM

I would not mention that you are a legacy. I know it means a lot to you but it can be the kiss of death for PNM's to mention it. If someone is writing you a recommendation the Chapter will know that you are a legacy. I think it might be more appropriate to mention it if you make it to preference then say set 2.

DubaiSis · #5 07-16-2013, 05:54 PM

You sound like you're on point. Mention it; a special note about your relationship with your mother is nice; but as I'm sure you are very aware, your loss is something a lot of 19 and 20 year olds will have no idea how to address and the last thing you want to do is make them uncomfortable. Keep it positive and don't let the conversation slip into loss, cancer, etc., even if you didn't start it. Those can be difficult conversations to dig your way out of. But again, I bet you are unfortunately very familiar with all of that.