Sorority Problems

[Greek Cutie]

I have this one sister who I just can't deal with anymore. And the hardest part of this whole situation is that we used to be really close (she was one of the people who made me feel most welcome when I came into chapter). The problem with her is that she acts so unsisterly. She tells secrets that other sisters have asked her not to, she talks about a lot of girls that she doesn't like in chapter, she is selfish, she is stubborn, she is snotty, and she messes around with so many guys that is has gotten to the point that people just use her for sex and EVERYONE in the other fraternities and sororities talks about it. Noone even seems to like her anymore. I want to talk to her about it, but whenever anyone tries to bring up something negative about her she snaps and acts like a bitch (sorry, but that is the only word that describes her). I just don't even know how to deal with this situation. I can't even trust her...she is constantly lying and making up stories to try to get people to think better of her. She just doesn't seem to understand that we are her sisters and we will accept her no matter what~we have tried telling her but she does not get the point. She never used to be like this when I just joined chapter (unless she always was, and I didn't know her well enough to realize it). And things have gotten worse with her when her cousin has joined our chapter. They are known as the two biggest snobs. When they are together, they do not talk to anyone else. I just hope none of you have to go through a situation like this. It is so hard to deal with, and it hurts because I used to be so close to her. Any advice???

[33girl]

If you have tried being nice to her and talking to her about the problems and it hasn't worked, she might need to be brought in front of standards board if everyone else also feels she is a detriment to the chapter.

There may be family problems or things like that that she doesn't want to share - that's her perogative, but if she is taking it out on the sisters when they have tried to be there for her that's not cool either. The SB might be the only way to wake her up to how negative she is being.

[LeslieAGD]

i totally agree with 33girl. there comes a point when you have to stop certain sisters from ruining your chapter's rep. sometimes bringing in advisors or bringing her/them up on unsisterly conduct is necessary to make her/them realize that you're not kidding and that the situation isn't something to be ignored. good luck!

[Carrieboberry]

OH boy...let me just say that things rings a very familiar bell! It's a tough situation..especially when you don't feel that you have the rapport and trust to communicate directly with this sister. I'm wondering why she's like this....I guess that looking from the outside in, it seems like this girl might be acting out and really be in need of help! Especially since she's sounds like she's changed 180 degrees from when you first knew her. My advice is this: I would privately have a conversation with a sister who knows you both very well and who you have a lot of respect for, and ask her opinion. I know she would help, as long as you didn't come across sounding bitchy (not that you would, girlie!) or spiteful. Just make sure that you convey your concern and not too many details that might further damage this sister's already compromised reputation. Good luck, and keep us posted!