I wasn't overreacting after all!

[AlphaChiGirl]

Before the server shut down, I was complaining about one of my suitemates with the amorous boyfriend, the moaning and groaning, and the body paint in my fridge.

Anyway, I felt like a heel coming down on her Tuesday afternoon, but decided to go ahead and do it...she seemed really embarassed about being heard...I just told her that although she has her own room, she shares walls with others, and no one wants to hear others having sex and to be mindful of the rest of us.

I decided to let the body paint slide...just chalked it up to a case of immaturity--it's like, "been there, done that, didn't leave the evidence lying around".

Anyway, things have been a lot better.

[Thrillhouse]

Thats good to hear, at least she wasn't mean about it.

[AlphaChiGirl]

I seriously thought things would be better. I seriously thought she was severely embarassed and would start being a little dignified...well...

About 4 weeks ago (about a week before I go home for Thanksgiving), I wake up (bear in mind we don't share a wall, and our doors were closed. Why did I hear her screaming and bedsprings creaking (LOUDLY) at 2:30 on a Tuesday morning? I couldn't get back to sleep, and I was pissed (similar things have happened w/ other suitemates and music, so we can't chalk this up to my being anti-sex or whatever). So, after knocking on the door and throwing dictionaries against the wall, I go into the living room to read. She comes out, and asks if I couldn't sleep. I was all, well, I couldn't sleep because you two were making a hell of a lot of noise. She apologized, and about three hours later, I was able to get to sleep...Bear in mind, I had 4 hours of sleep that night, had 9 am classes, and had a presentation in Italian, which (needless to say) I didn't do that hot in.

Fast forward to later on that week. After asking my mom (yes) for advice (whether or not to say anything), I go to her and I'm like, "that was not cute. I know you know as well as I do that you don't have to be that loud. I have 9 am classes. I had a presentation that I bombed. I had 4 hours of sleep, and I don't appreciate your obvious disrespect."

She acceeded, then she was like, "we have a life we have to lead." I told her I was completely aware of that, and I am also aware that that "life" does not have to wake others up, especially not at 2:30 AM on a Monday night. I also mentioned how there are only two people I should be hearing having sex when I'm in the privacy of my own room.

Then she started crying.

Not just tears around the eyes. I'm talking a Tammy Faye style blowout. "You hate us! You resent me because I'm a liberal! You resent me because I have sex with my boyfriend! What do you want? Do you not want us to have sex when you're around?" I informed her that if I did in fact resent her for those, I'd be a hypocrite. I also reminded her that if I hated her so much, I would move. Then she had the nerve to say that her boyfriend was scared to come out of the room that night because I was so mad. (If he's such a man to do what he was doing, he better have been man enough to come outside to use the restroom, right? ) She whined about how they don't get to spend time together, blah blah blah...then, she busts out with, "I heard you tell your mother about this! You violated my privacy!" Then started crying again. Needless to say, I didn't feel sorry for her one bit. She also tried to say that I was jealous...about what, she couldn't tell me.

A few days later, I went home for Thanksgiving. Things have been cordial, but nowhere near the way it was before. He stopped spending the night so much. Not that it had anything to do with me, of course, she's going abroad next semester and he's already told her he's going to break up with her. So, she's trying to keep her distance.

This morning...

I wake up at around 11:30 to see guess who BUCK NEKKID on my futon in the common room? It was not a pretty sight at all. I'm pretty unflappable, so I walked across the living room to heat up my hot chocolate, I had to pass by him and his bits and pieces. When he heard my hot cocoa go off, he realized he was uncovered and scurried under the sheets. She came in a few minutes later, and they did God knows what, and scurried off to take a shower.

So...based on the above incident, do I have the right to say anything again? I don't want to seem anal retentive, but that was just GROSS. I am not going to sit on my futon for a while, and I'm going to wash and disinfect the cover soon. Should I say anything? I have less than a week and a half left of the semester (after which I'm moving 'cause I'm studying abroad), but hey...that's just gross.

[TigerGirl52]

ABSOLUTELY!!!! That was totally disrespectful on their part not to mention totally inappropriate. I would definitely say something to her AND him. She's not the only guilty party. But hey...that's just me.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

Allison

[Hootie]

It's your place too and she should recognize that! How uncomfortable do you have to feel in your own place before she realizes what is going on is rude?!?!?!
I'd sit her down and say LOOK HERE... there are going to be some rules to live by or else you're going to have to find a new roommate. Don't make the rules so insane that she thinks of you as her mother...but the nekkid boyfriend on the couch!!!!!!!!!!

I'm having a problem myself because my roommate has a cat in our appartment and we're not supposed to. The other problem is I'm severly allergic to it and she doesn't seem to care. But my BIGGEST problem is that the damn cat has puked on the carpet in the living room and in her room. I'm going to tell her that if we risk loosing our downpayment due to the cat, she can pay me my half because it's not my fault that her cat ate tinsel!

URG!!!!!!!!!

[aggieAXO]

Hell yah you should say something. From a person that has had a similar problem I finally said it is him or me. Well my friend chose him and so I moved-best decision I could have made.

This guy does not pay rent, does not pay for any bills-this is your apt. and he should respect you so should your roommate. That is why I live by myself-my rules, my house, if you don't like them then get out. I guess by the time you reach your mid/late 20's living with a roommate is almost impossible. I have many single friends my age and none of us would ever have a roommate again. We all love to hang with each other but none of us want to live with each other-been there, done that.

[valkyrie]

Originally posted by brooklineu
Next time you walk out and dude is all naked, grab a camera and take a pic, post it up in the hall with the caption "I am too noisy when I have sex"

ROFLMAO!!! That is excellent!

[Beef]

Just record them having sex and when she is trying to sleep, put the stereo right next to her wall and crank it up. If she says anything just say "If I cant sleep while listening to you have sex, neither can you!"

[aggieAXO]

Beef I have to say I like that idea ....or just make a tape of yourself -let's just say having a "Harry Met Sally Moment"-having the big O and see what she says when you play it at 3 AM-this is the immature side of me talking.

[Beef]

Yeah, just make sure you turn up the bass so the wall shakes and rattles....


Or just make some sick tape with a bunch of moans and animal noises....


I only have one side, the immature one

[James]

Actually it does sound like you over reacted

[KillarneyRose]

It is starting to sound like your roommate has a few screws loose. I am pretty uninhibited, but if someone complained to me multiple times that I was disturbing them by having sex too loud, I would try to be more considerate.

Is this her first boyfriend or something? I'm thinking maybe she's kind of like, "Oh, I finally have someone to sleep with. I hope my roomie notices how irresistable he finds me! Let's do it REAL LOUD so she can't miss it! Oh and by the way, check out my boyfriend's package; isn't it the grooviest ?

How much longer are you going to have to live with this porn star wannabee?

[G8Ralphaxi]

I think your roommate is related to mine! I have two roommates, one ("K") is AWESOME...the other one ("M")I want to kick in the head on a daily basis.

M overreacts to EVERYTHING. I just had to laugh in a sad little recognition when you mentioned the crying temper tantrum.

Example #1:
We had the windows open and the fan on. It was 70 something outside, breezy and beautiful. M stomps out of her room, whining that it's too hot, then turns on the AC. HELLO! the windows are open! I just said to her (nicely), "Hey, M don't turn the air on - we've got the windows open" even though she knows damn well they're open.

She starts yelling at me "You're always starting issues with me!!! Why do you always do that?!?! It's HOTTTTTTTT (whiny tone) in my room!!! This is my house TOOOOOOOO (whining again)!!! I live here as much as you and K!!!"

I just said, are the windows open in your room? She yelled back that it doesn't do any good and stomped off.

Example #2:
K has this nice set of kitchen knives that you can't put in the dishwasher. They sit in one of those wood block holders.

I was studying at the kitchen counter and saw M use one to cut up some tomatoes for her lunch. I wasn't really paying all that much attention, just kind of noticed it. M finishes her food and takes it to her room.

Then K comes out and starts making her food. She pulls out a knife from the wood block thing and says "Ewww! What's this on my knife? Looks like, umm, tomato seeds or something?" I looked up and <light bulb flashing above my head> made the connection between the mess on the knife and M's lunch. So I said to K, hey, I saw M cutting tomatoes a couple minutes ago.

So K goes and knocks on M's door, and says to her (in a nice voice) "hey there M, listen, I don't care if you use my knives, but can you please wash them when you're done, okay?"

M slams her door open and starts screaming. "Why are you ALWAYS picking on me?!!?!?! It's like I can't do anything right! You are always starting issues with me!! I ALWAYS wash those knives!" (which is a lie - she usually tosses them in the dishwasher, even though we've both told her 1,000,000 times not too. K or I rescue them out of the dishwasher before we run it because SHE NEVER DOES)

She continues, "Maybe I don't wash them right away, but I was going to get to it! You never give me a chance! It's not fair! And there is a huge pile of dishes in the sink!"

Ok, the "huge pile of dishes" was one small plate (like a saucer for a cup - good size for toast) and a coffee cup and a fork. We have a double sink and the other side was totally empty. But that's not relevant to the knife issue anyway.

K tries to point out that the issue isn't "wash the knife immediately" it's "Don't put the damn knife back in the block all dirty! IT'S GROSS!" (K is no longer feeling any need to be nice).

M starts screaming and crying and slams the door in K's face.

THANK GOD - She's moving out this week! On Dec. 16! O happy day! I swear, if I had to live another week with this girl, I would go insane. I really should post more stories here, they are quite funny.

[AlphaChiGirl]

To answer a few questions...

Yes, this is the first man/boy (I consider him a boy) she's known in that sense. She confided to me about how mature she feels now that she's having sex!

I have one week, one day. But, this is during finals. I cannot deal with her and Hornyman when I'm trying to close out my time here.

Oh yeah, and his package wasn't the grooviest...

[dzrose93]

Originally posted by G8Ralphaxi
Example #2:
K has this nice set of kitchen knives that you can't put in the dishwasher. They sit in one of those wood block holders.

I was studying at the kitchen counter and saw M use one to cut up some tomatoes for her lunch. I wasn't really paying all that much attention, just kind of noticed it. M finishes her food and takes it to her room.

Then K comes out and starts making her food. She pulls out a knife from the wood block thing and says "Ewww! What's this on my knife? Looks like, umm, tomato seeds or something?" I looked up and <light bulb flashing above my head> made the connection between the mess on the knife and M's lunch. So I said to K, hey, I saw M cutting tomatoes a couple minutes ago.

So K goes and knocks on M's door, and says to her (in a nice voice) "hey there M, listen, I don't care if you use my knives, but can you please wash them when you're done, okay?"

M slams her door open and starts screaming. "Why are you ALWAYS picking on me?!!?!?! It's like I can't do anything right! You are always starting issues with me!! I ALWAYS wash those knives!" (which is a lie - she usually tosses them in the dishwasher, even though we've both told her 1,000,000 times not too. K or I rescue them out of the dishwasher before we run it because SHE NEVER DOES)

She continues, "Maybe I don't wash them right away, but I was going to get to it! You never give me a chance! It's not fair! And there is a huge pile of dishes in the sink!"

Ok, the "huge pile of dishes" was one small plate (like a saucer for a cup - good size for toast) and a coffee cup and a fork. We have a double sink and the other side was totally empty. But that's not relevant to the knife issue anyway.

K tries to point out that the issue isn't "wash the knife immediately" it's "Don't put the damn knife back in the block all dirty! IT'S GROSS!" (K is no longer feeling any need to be nice).

M starts screaming and crying and slams the door in K's face.

THANK GOD - She's moving out this week! On Dec. 16! O happy day! I swear, if I had to live another week with this girl, I would go insane. I really should post more stories here, they are quite funny.

M sounds like an old roommate I had in college my sophomore year. She, I'll call her G, would complain constantly about dishes being piled up in the sink, saying that she was the only person to ever do dishes. Well, my other roommate (I'll call her K) and I both knew that we did our dishes and that it was G who let dishes pile up before she'd do them.

So, K and I agreed that for one solid week we would immediately wash our dishes after using them and put them away, and that we wouldn't tell G about it. Sure enough, a week went by and there were all of G's dishes mounded up in the sink. She came in screaming at K and me while we were watching t.v. one night, saying that she was sick and tired of doing our part of the dishes in addition to hers. We immediately called her on it, and told her what we'd been doing that week. If looks could kill, K and I would've been 6 feet under once G found out about our little plan. She was so embarrassed. Heehee!