Just Spring COBed, feel really disconnected

[frostique]

My school has fall formal recruitment, but I Spring COBed really, really recently. When I COBed I only met up with 1 girl the first time, and her along with a different girl the second time. So today was my first chapter meeting, so basically my first time "encountering" all 250 of the girls.

I showed up like 10 minutes early, and was introduced to a girl who's basically like a Bid Day Buddy for COB. She was super intimidating - really gorgeous, perfect hair & makeup, super stylish clothes. Plus I pretty much didn't know ANY of the 250 girls there, and they were all super tight. When I get nervous I get really awkward and shy, so our conversation was really forced and generic and full of long pauses.

By the end of chapter I was so uncomfortable and in a hurry to leave that I just kind of smiled awkwardly at her, then got up and left without actually saying bye - REALLY bad move I know, but like I said when I get nervous I'm really awkward. When I was walking out of chapter she stayed behind, and all the other girls were lingering around chatting and laughing.. but I just left without talking to anyone because I didn't know anyone and didn't really feel welcome to introduce myself?

I got back to my room and read the letter my COB buddy gave me, and opened her present. The letter was really sweet and I guess just showed me another side of her since I was so intimidated. I texted her thanking her for writing me such a sweet note - that was 4 hours ago and she hasn't replied, I'm sure because I was being so awkward before.

Has anyone else had kind of similar experiences COBing? I know its still early since I just joined, so it's ridiculous to feel this way, but I kind of feel like I made a mistake accepting the bid. How can I get to know the girls more, given that it's such a huge chapter (almost 250), and they're already super tight and have been together for almost 6 months?