A Dualing Sorority Weekend

Bah! Ok, im going to my friends new apartment this weekend and she is going to be inviting some of her sisters from hers over. From they way they acted when I met them one time and what others have told me, I know they are going to be PAINS in the you know what. They are going to do nothing but talk about XYZ and yada yada. Im going to be asked about mine or put in that position and its gonna turn into the battle of who is the "best" rority and so on. I want to go b/c my friend and I had some issue but are on speaking terms again and out other HS friend will be there. Should I just keep my yap shut or get Ghetto Michigan Sorority Girl on them??? To make matters a little worst my other friend from HS, her bf might be coming andf is total anti-greek (has a whole philosphy on it, and is NOT at all afraid to mention it, even around a bunch of us, had him ask me and our friend, whats it like to buy friends?). Needless to say it should be an interesting weekend. Has anyone else ever been through this?

[pbpck]

As a greek, we will encounter situations like this on a daily basis. Even if it's just a look from a GDI on letter day. From personal experience, I must advise you to simply REPRESENT. Basically, whoever you come in contact with as a sister of XYZ, you create their impression of a "sorority girl." You can have massive backlash when they immaturely and naively bring up social fed cliches or you can adress the issue at hand in a mature and composed nature and actually educate these people.

As for your situation, if you calmly inform them of your chapter's atributes and make them realize that the greek system is only as strong as its weakest chapter, they will look like idiots.

Here's some points I usually make in response to GDI's statements:

You bought your friends:
"No, these are the people I would have found eventually as I have so much in common with them. Besides, not a penny of our money goes to parties and blonde hair dye(haha). We spend most of our time raising funds for our respective philanthropies...(Then talk about your philanthropy and make them see how much you care! )

Sororities and Fraternities are all about partying:
Bring up study tables, test files, ISS and IFC sports, leadership opportunities, alum connections! Make them see what a powerful network the greek system is. Tell them why you joined. I joined because the greek system ecompassed everything I did in HS...the activities that got me into my educational institution! They can't bash that.

In repsonse to the girls:

Well, if you have the GDI boyfriend there, they will most likely be the center of his criticism since it seems these girls are rather shallow if they are 'comparing whose sorority is better." So don't worry. You just let things roll off your back and you will be respected.

Good luck!
pbpck

[SLOTheta]

i've encountered this many times in my 4 years of dating various fraternity boys- date parties, formals, greek week, you name it, I've been there. Just be cool, collected, and above all, be a lady!!! They are just being superficial and catty, don't stoop to their level. I would suggest even changing the subject to an area you all can talk about, GDI's and the like.

Good luck!

PS My Sig Ep alum boyfriend HATES it when I go into sorority girl mode and chatters on with my sisters about sorority stuff.

[ShaedyKD]

Last fall, I went to visit my boyfriend at his university and met quite a few ladies from other sororities. Maybe it was because of the casual atmosphere, but we shared stories about activities that are unique to our schools, and spoke nicely of each other's GLO's on our own campus. I found these women to be very friendly and mature and our conversations led me to form a great opinion about their sororities. Hopefully your situation will go the same way, I don't know why these ladies that are sisters of your friend would try to make you uncomfortable. I know that when a sister's friend comes to visit, we all go out of our way to treat her as a friend of our own. Have a safe trip and a great visit!

[MoxieGrrl]

My advice is to answer their questions about your own house, but do not volunteer any more information than necessary (providing this is going to be a bad situation). Maybe just agree with them when they say their sorority is so great, yadda yadda yadda...hey, everyone thinks their sorority is the best, after all! If things aren't going well, try to steer the conversation in non-sorority direction?
When I deal with people who go off on an anti-Greek rampage, I just sit there, listen to them, then nod and say, "Not all organizations are like that, but I can see where you are coming from." If you can let them feel like their opinion is worth something, instead of counteracting, chances are they will just shut up.
The sad thing is sometimes educating people doesn't work if they refuse to hear the other side of the story.

[SilverTurtle]

Hey UMGirl!

I think you have the potential to change the perception of these girls, and perhaps demonstrate to any GDI's the ability of greeks to work together.

When the girls begin talking about their sorority, don't get competitive about it. Share your own stories (like Shaedy KD), exchange similar situations or really different things.


If they insist on the "who's best" competition, try to change the subject. But I think if you can get them talking, you might find you all learn a lot.

Good luck!

[Hootie]

One other reply to the "You pay for your friends" response is this...

"If I paid for my friends, then surely I am not paying enough."

I had a guy say that to me once (shame on him because I later found out he was a PIKE) and I replied with that comment. He smiled and said, "I never thought of it that way."

Good Luck!