Crashing a house from a different college

[laxdp]

Hey guys I wanted to know if most fraternities are ok with members from a different college sleeping in at their houses. My school is in the middle of nowhere so we never had anyone go through that needed to stay over night but I assume it would be fine. How do you go about this? Do you just show up? Contact the president beforehand? Call or facebook?

[MaryPoppins]

Call to make sure they can accommodate you. The timing might be bad for them. Or maybe they would let you crash on a couch at an apartment. Just be very aware you are seeking a favor as a brother.

[thetalady]

Originally Posted by laxdp

Hey guys I wanted to know if most fraternities are ok with members from a different college sleeping in at their houses. My school is in the middle of nowhere so we never had anyone go through that needed to stay over night but I assume it would be fine. How do you go about this? Do you just show up? Contact the president beforehand? Call or facebook?

Would you just show up unannounced at anyone's home and expect to be welcome, other than perhaps your parents' home, without calling first? I hope not!! You may be brothers, but you are still a guest. Use your manners. Pick up the phone and talk to the chapter president and ask politely for a favor.

[adpiucf]

We hosted a few girls from other chapters a few times when I was in college and I know that the fraternities at my school did the same. It was really nice to meet fellow members and compare chapter traditions and share ideas, in addition to inviting them to go out with us.

BUT Call ahead and clear it with the chapter president. If you don't have a phone number, start with Facebook or an email to make contact and get permission.

Don't just show up. It's creepy. Imagine someone coming to your doorstep claiming to be a member of your ABC University chapter. Would you just take them at face value and let them spend the night? Wouldn't you rather have heard from them in advance and verified who they were?

Call ahead.

[barbino]

I want to second what everyone else is saying: definitely call ahead. I also suggest confirming by email so that you have a written OK with that chapter's president. You don't just "crash" another chapter. As a member, it is important to show respect for each other. Ditto on what everybody has already said. I'm surprized that you needed to ask.

When I was in undergrad, I came home to my chapter house late one Sunday night (after 11pm) from studying at the library to find my brother sitting in the lobby. He was on his way back from a visit home and was going to his campus and his fraternity house but stopped by to visit me on the way. We had a short talk, and he asked if I knew any place where he could crash for the night. No problem. I immediately called the chapter president of the fraternity where I was a little sister at and asked him if my brother could crash on one of the couches for the night. Keep in mind that this was all before cell phones or none of this would have been an issue.

I told my brother where the house was, he witnessed my calling the president & heard the entire conversation. I did hear from 2 brothers who asked me about him, though. They said that yes, it was noticed that there was a strange guy who no one knew sleeping on one of their couches. Then some one had said that it was my brother so that was OK.

While I don't advocate doing this, there are circumstances that arise. Now, I would not even stop by to visit one of our chapters without calling first. I did visit Northwestern's chapter house once while I was in college without calling beforehand, but this was the one & only time. Have a great visit!

[33girl]

Call ahead, definitely. Things are not the big open arms lovefest that they once were - partly because of risk management, and partly because of the crazies out there.

[laxdp]

Thanks everyone for the comments. I was definitely going to call but I just didn't know how other houses felt about allowing people sleep at their houses.