I could use some dinner party advice

[Leslie Anne]

I could really use some advice about what to bring to a small dinner party I'm going to. I've been taking a class this summer. (I'm working on a certificate program related to my master's in library science.) Our class meets for the last time this Thursday night but instead of meeting on campus our professor and his wife are having a small dinner party for us at their home. There are only 5 students in the class so it will be a small group.

I realize this shouldn't be all that difficult but I'm not the most social person. My professor is a very nice man but he's also the former president of the American Library Association. I'm a bit intimidated by him.

So, what do I bring?

Any help would be very much appreciated.

[trojangal]

A nice bottle of wine is always welcome at any gathering. You could also bring a nice dessert cake as well.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by trojangal

A nice bottle of wine is always welcome at any gathering. You could also bring a nice dessert cake as well.

Unless you have been asked to bring something, I would pass on bringing a dessert. If a host or hostess is having a dinner party and has planned out a menu, the last thing they want to see is someone bringing more food that they hadn't anticipated and that may not go with the menu they carefully thought out. I'd never bring food without asking first "What can I bring?" If he says "nothing, just yourself," then take him at his word. If you do bring food of some kind, make clear that it's for the host and hostess to enjoy later so they they don't have to worry that you expect it to be served at the dinner party.

A good bottle of wine is always appropriate (assuming they drink wine). But again, don't expect them to serve it because it may not go with the meal. I sometimes say "this is for you to unwind with after we're all gone."

Flowers are always appropriate as well. Have fun!

[ellebud]

Ask what you might contribute. Generally hosts like wine or desserts. However,my standby appetizers: shrimp with cocktail sauce on a platter, cheese/fruit(grapes or fig spread--go to the Cheese Store for recs) with crackers, salmon roe caviar on sour cream...sprinkled with a few chives and crackers

Or lovely flowers in an inexpensive jar (so the hostess doesn't have to stop and cut flowers) Wine is always nice, as is fruit.

Most of all, have a wonderful time!

[ellebud]

MysticCat" Am I looking over your shoulder?

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by ellebud

MysticCat" Am I looking over your shoulder?

I was just coming back to add, if you want to take food of some kind, think along the lines of a good breakfast bread that can be for the next morning.

[Leslie Anne]

Thank you all for the suggestions!

I think I'll probably bring a bottle of wine. I'm not much of a drinker though so I'll need a little bit more input. What kind do you suggest? How much do you need to spend to get a decent bottle of wine? I don't want to be cheap but I don't want to be extravagant and pretentious either.

I recognize the awkwardness of asking for dollar amounts but I trust GC to point me in the right direction. You can PM me.

[AZTheta]

I often bring some quality whole-bean coffee (e.g. Peet's or any of the other boutique coffees, gosh, anything but *$'s). I'm with MysticCat - a coffee cake from a great bakery is good and so appreciated and unique.

LeslieAnne, I can talk to a rock. But I know you've shared that you aren't super comfortable in social settings... However, you can prepare yourself to be the best listener ever. People adore people who truly listen to them. And the ones who don't talk as much generally really captivate others when they do speak.

[Drolefille]

If you're not sure what wine to get, go to a local wine store and tell them you need a bottle to bring to a dinner party as a gift for the host and hostess. It doesn't have to be that expensive to find something that tastes good and/or is quirky and fun if you prefer that. Local vineyard, funny name/label, or a 'best buy' are all good ideas.

And ultimately it's the thought that matters rather than the price or the wine itself. They might hate reds (or whites, or pinots or whatevers) but it shouldn't matter.

[ms_gwyn]

I'm not a drinker (you know this), but I think a Merlot or a Barolo would be good

[FHwku]

i don't know what kind of humor your professor has, but Cosentino has a Meritage white blend called "The Novelist." $15-$20

or you could get him a coffee table book about wine or wineries, in lieu of an actual bottle.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by FHwku

i don't know what kind of humor your professor has, but Cosentino has a Meritage white blend called "The Novelist." $15-$20

LOL. I love to pick gift wines based on the label when it's something fun like this.

My current go-to wine for something like a hostess gift is an Argentine Malbec. I recently heard a sommelier say that he had never been disappointed by any Argentine Malbec, regardless of the label, and that has been my experience as well.

[SydneyK]

Have you asked the prof what you can bring? If you haven't been asked to contribute to the evening's menu, then you've been given some excellent suggestions - bottle of wine, coffee, coffee table book, fruit, flowers. If your prof asked you to bring something specific (e.g. appetizer, salad, dessert) and you're at a loss, let me know and I'd be happy to share some of my favorite easy-but-snazzy dinner party recipes.

When I was in grad school, one of my profs had a dinner party for all of us. I didn't have any idea what to take, so I took a wine bottle holder (similar to this). I also stashed a thank you card in my purse, thinking I might have an opportunity to write a quick note. I didn't have such an opportunity, but I mailed my thank you the next morning. (My classmates called me a brown-noser for the thank you note, but it seemed appropriate to me - his wife laid out an amazing spread, and she totally deserved some recognition for the work she put in for people she hadn't ever met. I couldn't not thank her.)

[Gusteau]

Originally Posted by SydneyK

When I was in grad school, one of my profs had a dinner party for all of us. I didn't have any idea what to take, so I took a wine bottle holder (similar to this). I also stashed a thank you card in my purse, thinking I might have an opportunity to write a quick note. I didn't have such an opportunity, but I mailed my thank you the next morning. (My classmates called me a brown-noser for the thank you note, but it seemed appropriate to me - his wife laid out an amazing spread, and she totally deserved some recognition for the work she put in for people she hadn't ever met. I couldn't not thank her.)

In other words, your classmates were mad that they hadn't thought of it first, lol. I'm a huge proponent of thank you notes. Twice this summer my coworkers and I had the opportunity to write notes, the first time I wrote them while everyone rolled their eyes, the second time everyone else followed suit.

Leslie Anne if you decide on wine, your local wine store might have labels next to bottles that indicate employee favorites. They usually (but not always) pick out gems throughout price ranges, so that could be a good way to choose a bottle.

[AZTheta]

Yay! Gusteau is back!

And hand-written thank you notes are totally always appropriate and appreciated.