Grad Student SF's

[Little32]

For those of you who are starting your first semester of grad school. (I remember there being a few threads earlier this year about grad school and getting into grad school. So I know you all are out there.) How is it going. I just started in September and it has been interesting to say the least. (I am working towards my Ph.D. and in it for the long haul.)

For those of you who are further along, any helpful hints for us beginners?

[brown_ambition]

Whoa....I almost posted about this....but I decided to do a search first.....glad I did! This is my first semester in grad school and I am trying to figure out if going to grad school right after undergrad (literally...I finished in August) was the brightest idea! Did anyone in here that's gone through grad school have some feelings of doubt around the end of the first semester? And for anyone in grad school....how's your semester going?

Brown Ambition
(BTW....I am new to this board.....HI!!!)

[korkscru]

God bless the both of you while you are going through grad school. I remember how things were (I fininshed grad school in 1997) and it wasn't easy. During that time I was working full-time AND I was a single parent. So you can just IMAGINE what it was like. But...I ENDURED (with God's help and guidance). That's the key--to ENDURE. What helped the most was that I had a friend who was going through along with me. We took all of the same classes, worked at the same place, consulted each other on assignments, etc.---it was like we were joined at the hip for 2 years. I feel that you guys are going to make it. Grad school is relatively easier than undergrad because you just focus on your major the whole time. Things will more than likely seem to get tough, but you guys can do it. Just think you're setting the tone for younger African-American girls (and others). That's another thing that helped me too---the fact that I was setting the prime example for my daughter (who was there to watch me accept my M.A. degree).

Oh what a crowning moment. Your hard work will prove to be well worth it when you both walk down that aisle to recieve your degrees.

GOOD LUCK and I'll be praying for you.

[PKTSU01]

Well, for me, law school is kicking my ass up and down the block. it isn't as impossible as people say it is, but there's a serious amount of work, and the terminology is literally like learning a new language. I'm not doing too bad, and hopefully I'll land a legal dept internship with EMI at some point in the near future. it's all about connections anyway. I think i am making the right choice in going right after I graduated college though. i seriously doubt that if I got a job paying pretty good money that I would leave it just to go back to school and listen to a professor say his thing for another 3 years. I'd rather pay my dues now and reap benefits most people aren't able to when they are 25.

[Little32]

It good to hear from other folks in this position. It is not kicking my butt per se, but I am having doubts. I wonder if there is not something more meaningful that I can be doing right now, particularly in light of recent events. As these things are going on in the world, I feel isolated, locked in the ivory tower of the academy so to speak. Korkscru, gotta say, I admire you. Grad school with a child, couldn't do it. Thanks for the words of encouragement. Brown Ambition, like the woman said we must persevere and endure.

[korkscru]

Well Little32, I really wasn't looking for any applause or praise for doing what I've done (although the compliment was very much appreciated--Thank you, Sisterfriend). I feel that I've gone through and was able to accomplish a lot BECAUSE of my daughter (and now also my son). You see, I'm one who will NEVER forget where I came from and what MY mother went through as a single parent of four (and she only had her high school diploma). I decided at a very young age that I WOULD NOT go through many of the things that my mother had to go through. I also decided that my CHILDREN would NEVER have to go through a lot of stuff that I went through as a child. Those things just were NOT going to be factors or issues in my life. And by obtaining my B.S. and M.A., I broke MANY cycles that had been in my family for years.

Plain and simple, I just wanted you and others to know that you CAN do it. That was just a little part of my life that I wanted to share with you all. And believe me, if or when you have children, you'll be AMAZED at your strength (mental and physical) and the things that you would do (and I mean that in a EVERY aspect). Because when you have children, your ENTIRE life changes. You actually see things in a different light. Your priorities change. You realize that it's not all about you anymore. I do believe that had it not been for the Lord and the many obstacles that I've endured (including the struggle of being a single parent for a short time---I'm now married to my daughter's father), I wouldn't be where I am now. NO, it's not going to be easy, but you (and others) CAN and WILL make it.

I'm going to say this and then I'll shut up, okay? My daughter, 8-years-old, said something to me about one year ago that COMPLETELY broke me down. She said "Ma, I want to be just like you when I grow up." You can just IMAGINE what that did to me. Even until this day, whenever I think about that, I get emotional. I realized at that moment that, yes it is a FACT that our children are looking at us. We lead by example. I remember telling my daughter "No, Courtland, I don't want you to be like me. I want you to be BETTER than me." THAT was one of the most humbling moments in my life because I knew that this little girl (and God knows how many other children--and even ADULTS) were looking at ME to SHOW them the right and positive things to do with their lives.

Everything that I went through in order to get those degrees, every sacrifice that was made, every obstacle that I had to overcome---all of it was worth it because my children DESERVE it, my husband DESERVES it, and last, but not least, I DESERVE it. (Let me go, Girl, before I start to cry).

[Little32]

Thank You, Sisterfriend. You have no idea how much I appreciate and needed to here some words of encouragement. It is towards the end of the semester now, and you know how that gets. (In fact I should be working now. ) And as for the compliment, everyone needs a standing ovation now and then, right. (If I knew how to do the emoticon to show applause you would see it here.) YAY korkscru!!

[nikki25]

It has been a huge transitional challenge in pursuing my doctorate thusfar...but I am yet holding on. I would encourage my fellow grad school sisterfriends to hold on to God's unchanging hand because when your circumstances seem to question your very purpose and being, you can rest in knowing that God hasn't erred in placing you where you are and he will never leave nor forsake you. He won't put you in a place and be like : "Aight, peace, I'm out!" Rather, in His almighty awesomeness, he keeps you!

Hold on and hold out!

[pointNclick]

Ladies...

I just completed my doctoral program in May of this year (took 4 years) and my degree will be conferred in 2 weeks. My last year was spent correcting the dissretation and it was done long distance in a new job, that I recently left. Long story behind that. As a 30 year old female with all my degrees and education behind me, I wish you all the best of luck and the best of wisdom. The road to a Ph.D. is truly not for the weak or unsure and it can be HELLISH (pardon the "french"). But the true intellectual and professional rewards are plentiful.

My solid gems of advice are as follows:

1) make sure this is what you want to do
2) enjoy the time. It will never come to you like this or in this way ever again
3) STUDY! STUDY! STUDY!
4) never leave your campus ABD! Because you will probably stay ABD. Try to get a close to your defense and submission of your final product as possible. (when I left, I had a successful defense and was left with corrections to make).
5) create a positive, stress free place in your life. remove all negative people, thoughts, and habits
6) connect with a mentor in your department or somewhere on campus
7) get involved in extrcirrcular activities
8) get to know people at the Grad School, they will help you out in more ways than you could ever realize
9) always carry $5.00 in change for the copier. You never know where you will come across an article that relates to your research
10) don't gain weight. I gained 30 lbs. during my 4 years of grad school and I am struggling to lose it now.

[Little32]

pointnclick,

Did you never have doubts?

[pointNclick]

Yes, I had doubts all along the way. Was I smart enough? Was this what I wanted? Would I make it through? Would I my research make sense to anyone else besides me? What would the students think when they saw me? What would I think when I looked at myself? Basically, was I strong enough to be judged by my peers? Was I strong?

Yeah I think so ;-)

Doubts are natural. As long as you believe in yourself and your path--- you will make it through. E-mail me offline if you want to chat more or need some support through your process.

pNc

Originally posted by Little32
pointnclick,

Did you never have doubts?

[Little32]

Thanks pnc, I'll do that.

[nikki25]

Originally posted by pointNclick
Ladies...



My solid gems of advice are as follows:

4) never leave your campus ABD! Because you will probably stay ABD. Try to get a close to your defense and submission of your final product as possible. (when I left, I had a successful defense and was left with corrections to make).
5) create a positive, stress free place in your life. remove all negative people, thoughts, and habits
6) connect with a mentor in your department or somewhere on campus
7) get involved in extrcirrcular activities
8) get to know people at the Grad School, they will help you out in more ways than you could ever realize
9) always carry $5.00 in change for the copier. You never know where you will come across an article that relates to your research
10) don't gain weight. I gained 30 lbs. during my 4 years of grad school and I am struggling to lose it now.

Indeed, these are truly SOLID pearls of wisdom! Thanks so much. I'm in my first year and that #4 was something I really needed to read.

[FuturePhD]

Just out of curiousity, what is everybody getting their PhD in? Or what did you get it in?

[pointNclick]

Originally posted by FuturePhD
Just out of curiousity, what is everybody getting their PhD in? Or what did you get it in?

I see you are posting from Knoxville. That is where I received my Ph.D. from. My degree is in Communications.