advice from bglo and glo

WhiteCoKlate · #1 02-20-2001, 12:28 PM

Greetings.I am new to this so bare with me I am a WHITE FEMALE attended a hbcu. Its hard as it is because i am the minority but now i have a bigger problem.I am intrested in joining a BGLO and they hate me.(i think) I attened almost all of thier events and they are so unfriendly. They don't speak to me or show any type of nice attitude. When my friends and i walk around campus, they make it a point 2 speak to all my friends but they DO NOT speak to me. I am crushed and hurt by this. Their rush is next week and i want to attend. My question to you is should I go? I know that this question and topic has been asked already because i read them, but how many can really say HONESTYLY that u wouldn't have a problem with someone of another race joing your organization...pleaseeee respond..I am so lost and need some advice. and i know it is my race because i have the gpa , i hang around the right crowd,comm service, researched my info,kissed ass.. EVERYTHING...its not right

NUPE4LIFE · #2 02-20-2001, 12:38 PM

WOW! This is a new one.

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KAPPA ALPHA PSI FRATERNITY, INC.
SPR 97
XI LAMBDA

Finer Woman10-A-91 · #3 02-20-2001, 12:47 PM

I am blown. Is this real? 2 words...self esteem. Stop kissing a$$...and ask yourself WHY would you WANT to be a sister to group of ill behaved women?

FYI...all of the NPHC orgs have white members.

Quote:

Originally posted by WhiteCoKlate:
Greetings.I am new to this so bare with me I am a WHITE FEMALE attended a hbcu. Its hard as it is because i am the minority but now i have a bigger problem.I am intrested in joining a BGLO and they hate me.(i think) I attened almost all of thier events and they are so unfriendly. They don't speak to me or show any type of nice attitude. When my friends and i walk around campus, they make it a point 2 speak to all my friends but they DO NOT speak to me. I am crushed and hurt by this. Their rush is next week and i want to attend. My question to you is should I go? I know that this question and topic has been asked already because i read them, but how many can really say HONESTYLY that u wouldn't have a problem with someone of another race joing your organization...pleaseeee respond..I am so lost and need some advice. and i know it is my race because i have the gpa , i hang around the right crowd,comm service, researched my info,kissed ass.. EVERYTHING...its not right

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Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Incorporated...Every Finer Woman's Dream!

gphi2k · #4 02-20-2001, 12:58 PM

All I can say is, I CAN'T WAIT to hear the advice on this thread.
Talk about the tables being turned.
Being non-white and joining a GLO is in not 'taboo' per say but has shown up a lot in other threads and has spurred a lot of heated discussion. I'll be intersted to hear what is said about someone white wanting to join a bglo. To be honest, I was always wondering what would happen if this situation were to arrive. I'm anxious to hear the answer.

Leslie

BlueReign · #5 02-20-2001, 02:07 PM

Ditto that 12dn4dst!!

Also I would like to add that even if you think that "they don't like you" just go for it anyway. It could be all in your head or maybe they are "not speaking to you" just to see how badly you want to be a part of the sisterhood. Please just be yourself and never KISS ASS!!

Attend the rush next week and come back and tell us how it went.

Peace!

BABELSUSA · #6 02-20-2001, 03:10 PM

ok..go to the Rush events, you will never know what would have happened if you dont go..right? And you know..its is SO much better to know then to never have known at all. Then, you will REALLY see whether or not the organization will make you happy. Because if you feel uncomfortable, and no matter how bad you want to be in there, you should not be in something that makes you feel unwanted. Being in a sorority is one thing, and enjoying the whole experience is another. Good luck, and let us know how it is!!!!!

CutiePie2000 · #7 02-20-2001, 03:26 PM

Yes, be BRAVE(!!) and go to the events!

Otherwise, you will never know!

AXO Alum · #8 02-20-2001, 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by NUPE4LIFE:
WOW! This is a new one.

NUPE4LIFE, You always find a way to make me smile

In response to the original question, WhiteCoKlate, you say:
"I know that this question and topic has been asked already because i read them, but how many can really say HONESTYLY that u wouldn't have a problem with someone of another race joing your organization...pleaseeee respond"

I fully believe that HONEST responses have been posted by all -- so you may want to go back and re-read those and see what you come up with.

Otherwise, I'd say the advice so far has really summed it up.

Ideal08 · #9 02-20-2001, 04:41 PM

WhiteCoKlate, you might also want to take a look at the December issue of Ebony magazine. There is an article on this very subject, complete with pictures for your viewing pleasure!

My advice, don't let the attitudes of a few discourage you from your goal. This is not just about Greek life, this is about life in general. If you allow yourself to be turned away before you even try, you have given other people power and control over your life. If you want it, go get it. Good luck!

ManndingoNUPE · #10 02-20-2001, 06:10 PM

Whew, I feel for you, but as everyone here has said, it could just be a test to see how badly you want it. I will be honest with you, it will be harder for you becuase of the fact that you are white. I could sit up here and lie to you, but it would do you and I no good.

If this org is in your heart, then you might make it one day. But on the flip, if these women do not want you as thier sister, then you won't be at that chapter. I would still persue it though, and see where it goes.

While I think that it is wrong to turn someone away becuase of thier race, I will always side with a chapter to decide who they want to call sister or brother. If I don't want you for whatever reason, you won't get my vote, and if I really don't like you, then I will lobby my bros to not let you in.

Just becuase a person has a desire to become a member of an org, doesn't mean that they will be admitted.

Good luck

MN

[This message has been edited by ManndingoNUPE (edited February 20, 2001).]

prettypoodle6 · #11 02-20-2001, 06:21 PM

If you dont go to rush you will kick yourself for never finding out what could have been!!! Like someone said earlier, just cause your white, some orgs/chapters will push you and test you to see exactly how much you want it... i've seen it a few times in my 5 years!! and these men and women have gone on to become members.

whatever you do, PLEASE be yourself!! if they "act like they hate you" so what! keep going to their events, support their functions, and go to rush. If its in your heart then go for it! And if things dont go favorably, remember that this is a lifetime commitment and there will be other opportunities.

I wish you the best of luck and please keep us posted!

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Rhoyal Blue and Gold...I LOVE my SGRho!

[This message has been edited by prettypoodle6 (edited February 20, 2001).]

MaMaBuddha · #12 02-21-2001, 12:26 AM

kissing arse, will get you no where.

this is a goal you want and there will be people and obstacles in your way to kept you from achieving it.

as my man Mr Vegas says...

Heads High...kill dem wit it now
Just mek a bway know you nah blow
Heads High... kill dem wit it now
No bway ain't got no secret fi yow
Heads High... kill dem wit it now
Just mek a bway know you nah blow
Heads High.. kill dem wit it now
Tell dem Vegas say so...

in other words...

keep your head up and don't let anyone discourage you.

let us know how it went....

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MaMaBuddha

Devastating
Stimulating
Tantalizing
_________________________

Imaginer un métro rempli avec les anges tombés...

[This message has been edited by MaMaBuddha (edited February 20, 2001).]

12dn94dst · #13 02-21-2001, 01:04 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by WhiteCoKlate:
and i know it is my race because i have the gpa , i hang around the right crowd,comm service, researched my info,kissed ass.. EVERYTHING...its not right

As you've experienced, it's not all that easy. As has been said to many an interest of an NPHC organization, there are too many subjective aspects to this game to assume you've done EVERYTHING or you have ALL the qualifications.

Quote:

Originally posted by Finer Woman10-A-91:
2 words...self esteem. Stop kissing a$$...and ask yourself WHY would you WANT to be a sister to group of ill behaved women?

FYI...all of the NPHC orgs have white members.

I couldn't agree more. I like to believe the members of the NPHC organizations are very astute when it comes to knowing who is doing what just because they want membership. I realize I don't know both sides of the story, but it may very well be that their behavior is because you're trying TOO hard (yes, there is such a thing) and not because you're white. And I do agree with FinerWoman, if these women are behaving that rudely toward you, why would you want to be a member of that chapter? I'm sure you know there's more than one way into the 4 sororities, if the organization is what you want, you'll find another means of getting there.

Best of luck.

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Kelli
Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc.
12-Delta Nu-94
MAL, Southern Region

[This message has been edited by 12dn94dst (edited February 20, 2001).]

Monique · #14 02-21-2001, 10:43 PM

Gyrl, don't worry about it. If they don't won't you don't worry about them..That sorority is bigger than that one chapter. Be yourself and Stop Kissing Ass

Bobby Earl · #15 02-22-2001, 12:32 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ManndingoNUPE:
Whew, I feel for you, but as everyone here has said, it could just be a test to see how badly you want it. I will be honest with you, it will be harder for you becuase of the fact that you are white. I could sit up here and lie to you, but it would do you and I no good.

If this org is in your heart, then you might make it one day. But on the flip, if these women do not want you as thier sister, then you won't be at that chapter. I would still persue it though, and see where it goes.

While I think that it is wrong to turn someone away becuase of thier race, I will always side with a chapter to decide who they want to call sister or brother. If I don't want you for whatever reason, you won't get my vote, and if I really don't like you, then I will lobby my bros to not let you in.

Just becuase a person has a desire to become a member of an org, doesn't mean that they will be admitted.

Good luck

MN

[This message has been edited by ManndingoNUPE (edited February 20, 2001).]

I KOMPLETELY agree with my Frat. If people don't won't you to get in, you won't get in. It's hard but fair and sad but true.
Maybe BGLOs should be color blind, but this world isn't so why should BGLOs play the good samaritan. Seriously, I will not discourage you either. Go for it. The harder it is the better you will appreciate it.

Nevertheless, I am ALSO curious to know why you are interested in an organization with representatives who (you think) don't like you. If they don't like you, join something else. Just pledge (I mean go through the intake process for those of you who are unaware and continue to hate

the beautiful and sacred practice of pledging) Me Phi Me Sorority Incorporated. They will never turn you down.

No matter what your race is....

[This message has been edited by Bobby Earl (edited February 21, 2001).]