Withdrawing from the Fraternity

Harison27 · #1 12-02-2003, 07:39 PM

Gentlemen, i have an individual who has expressed an interest to be completely removed from the Nationals roster of members of our fraternity. Due to hazing, harrassment and a number of other factors years ago, he wants to be removed and have no association with us or anything to do with the name Lambda Chi Alpha. What routes can he take since he went thru ritual and all. I hate to lose a brother but I can't talk him out of changing his mind. apparently he is still receiving calls from brothers from his original chapter who still target his coming out in the 70's.

EM1843 · #2 12-02-2003, 08:51 PM

I don't know of a way to do that. You can make it so that INT does not contact him and doesn't list his number or address. I hope you can change his mind, but we all understand if you can't. Good luck. BTW do you know what chapter he is from?

Harison27 · #3 12-03-2003, 02:08 AM

It is my understanding that the Chapter in question is not nor has been targeting this Alumni. He happens to be someone whom I know that currently lives in our town who is an Alumni but from a differnt school. It is in fact the Alumns from his own chapter who went thru with him that are apparently still the problem. Especially since they appear to be active alumni in their individual communities.

Brother Good · #4 12-03-2003, 11:07 AM

When you gather differing sentiments from these posts maybe you can pass them along to the member we are discussing. The power of the Internet would seem to work in this situation. This could enlighten and broaden his view.

Mike_Kellar · #5 12-03-2003, 03:24 PM

I agree with what has been said about the harrassment issue. It is a shame, especially in today's world, that close-mindedness still runs rampit. I guess I will never figure it out.

In response to your question, the alum in question will need to notify, I think, both the undergraduate chapter and HQ with his intent to resign. My recommendation would be for him to do this in writing. Hell, it might even be worth it for him to forward his resignation letter to Betsy Bly to be published - I'm guessing there will be quite a few brothers more than displeased on the whole issue.

What has been said, "Every Man a Man...PERIOD".

Tom Earp · #6 12-03-2003, 05:41 PM

While not in agreement with all that has been posted, some information has been presented to you that may be of help in letting This Brother Resign!

I am sure, all of us not knowing the full situation can only go from what you have posted.

It seems a sad state of affairs that this type of thing should be going on towards another Brother!

Let Me Know.

justaflaneur · #7 12-03-2003, 08:22 PM

To clear up the legal issues . . .

Article X, Section 8 of the Constitution provides: "Any member who presents his resignation from the Fraternity, in writing, to any Unit (meaning the Subordinate Zeta or the Grand High Zeta) shall be declared automatically expelled from the Fraternity by the Grand High Zeta. The Unit receiving such written resignation shall immediately forward the same to the General Fraternity Office of Administration. The Grand High Zeta may make an exception in the case of religious principles or other valid reasons for resignation and allow the member to resign."

There is no real distinction made between resignation and expulsion. The practical effect of the GHZ "allowing" a member to resign is more of a face-saving issue - it avoids the stigma of automatic expulsion.

Members who are expelled or are allowed to resign may be reinstated only by way of Code X-4. The resigning member must surrender his badge (Code VI-19), but will be compensated for same.

EM1843 · #8 12-03-2003, 11:31 PM

Has that changed at all due to the recent changes about descrimination? INT now includes sexual orientation in their list of descriminations.

justaflaneur · #9 12-04-2003, 10:55 AM

You're right - discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation was precluded by legislation passed at the Denver General Assembly in 2002.

The concept of "other valid reasons" is discretionary and can be interpreted broadly. Given the facts presented so far, it would not be surprising for the GHZ to find his resignation to have been for valid reasons.

Tom Earp · #10 12-04-2003, 05:43 PM

Chip, that was my thoughts exactly!

As you know, one of My Closest Brothers from a Zeta you and I are familiar with is Gay. Big Friggin deal.

All or Most of His Brothers know he is gay, but is one of the hardest working Alums in that Zeta.

I hope that this can be conveyed to this Brother who wants to resign, showing that not all LXA Brothers are Pencil Necked Dicks.

But I think the true point is for this Brother is to be made welcome as a Initiated Brother of LXA, not someone who is so preasurered to have to resign.

Harrison, please convey all of this to Our Brother in question.

In ZAX,

john1082 · #11 12-04-2003, 08:08 PM

When we lose a brother I am particularly troubled. I do not know of whom you speak; I would not know him if he walked into the room. Yet there is a kinship there.

Should he resign I may never have the opportunity to meet this man. I will likely never have the opportunity to sit down and chat with him about his undergraduate time. I'll not know his family. If assiatance shuld be necessary, I would be unable to offer it. These are all precious opportunities that we would all be denied should he resign.

I cannot do much about those that are giving him a hard time. What I can do is extend my hand to him, as I have to all my brothers. The Ritual teaches many things, but hatred isn't one of them. The individuals engaged in harrassment will cheat me - and you - out of an opportunity to know this brother.

If we reflect on the teachings of our Ritual we will see that there is no place within our Fraternity for this conduct. Regardless of orientation, we have accepted this man as our brother and nothing can - or should change that. Certainly not the conduct of a small group (I'd guess five or less) of vindictve children. This is the same man that was pledged or associated and voted on. Nothing changes that. He is our brother.

Regardless of our individual lifestyles, we have accepted this man as our brother. It cannot be made clearer or plainer than that. Those that are making his life difficult do not reflect our Fraternal values and we cannot let them deprive the rest of us of this Brother's friendship.

Please share this note with our questioning Brother. I would certainly like to chat with him if he would like to talk to me.

John Donne, In Meditation XVII said that "...No Man Is An Island.."

http://isu.indstate.edu/ilnprof/ENG451/ISLAND/

The focus of this piece of English literature was that we are not isolated, rather, that man exists in a common community and that we all suffer a loss when there is a passing. I cannot find any more eloquent words than this to describe my thoughts. I pray that you may be able to persuade him otherwise.

Tom Earp · #12 12-05-2003, 06:12 PM

John,

Beeeeutaful, that is with out a doubt, the best thing said!

Harison, please convey all of our thoughts to this Brother in his time of strife and anguish!

We all as Brothers hate to lose a Good Man because of nonsense like this!

Harison27 · #13 12-07-2003, 03:28 PM

Gentlemen, I will print and send him everything that has been said. A lot of good advice and one eloquently written bit of advice from John. I will advise him to the best of my ability but can only go from there. tks for the advice.

EM1843 · #14 12-07-2003, 04:01 PM

Good luck.