Sigh..Dilemma

deuika · #1 03-15-2004, 08:28 PM

Hey Ya'll

Ok, I have an issue. My friend is interested in ABC Sorority, but she knows ABSOLUTELY nothing about this organization. I mind you this is a NPHC Sorority, and basically, they don't play that.

Anywho, so she is asking me to write a letter to the organization for her, an organization I'm not even interested in. I have told her REPEATEDLY that if she is serious about this she has to do the research herself, I know more about the organization than she does. She says she like the colors, I'm like WTH? You are considering becoming a member for life because of some colors? She's my friend and all, and I don't want to hurt her feelings. But I KNOW she's not serious about this. I have told her to find out more, contact some members of the organization, do SOMETHING!

I don't know how else to get it through her thick skull that you don't just DECIDE one day that you wouldn't mind being a ABC, no way this organization is gonna accept someone who doesn't even know the year they were fricing founded!!!!

Any Suggestions?

chideltjen · #2 03-15-2004, 08:30 PM

Tell her to buzz off and do her own research.

deuika · #3 03-15-2004, 09:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by chideltjen
Tell her to buzz off and do her own research.

lol...Yeah that works....She's so lazy, sad really.

Glitter650 · #4 03-15-2004, 09:52 PM

well she's not going to get the chance to join if she doesn't do her research... isn't that part of their intake kinda proving your interest and such before they even ask you to be part of the line ? I wouldn't worry about it because with your help or not she's not getting in if she's not THAT serious about it, they'll be able to tell she's not into it and hasn't done research...

deuika · #5 03-15-2004, 10:13 PM

Yeah, well I suppose you're right. I just hate to leave people hanging.

tnxbutterfly · #6 03-15-2004, 11:22 PM

This probably not going to help much, but if your friend is really serious about ABC sorority then her first bet would to be look over the national website for ABC. She can find a ton of information.

It's nice that you want to help your friend, but at the same time you can't hold her hand. If she "really" wants to be a member, then she should be doing all she can to learn about the organization.

33girl · #7 03-16-2004, 12:07 AM

Just be straight up and say if she doesn't get her isht together and do some research, she ain't even getting in the door.

If she doesn't want to listen to you, that's her own dumb fault.

chideltjen · #8 03-16-2004, 01:16 AM

Just remember that YOU cannot pledge for her. So if she isn't motivated to even start, there really is no point for her to try. The sisters will see that she is probably going to do this half @$$ed.

Peaches-n-Cream · #9 03-16-2004, 01:23 AM

I think that you can point her in the right direction by showing her how to research the sororities online. If she doesn't have the initiative to take it from there, she probably isn't ready to seek membership.

crystalline · #10 03-16-2004, 04:14 AM

It sounds to me like she seriously has some more thinking she should do on the matter. She definitely needs to find out more about ABC than just their colors.

jubilance1922 · #11 03-16-2004, 11:55 AM

Coming from an NPHC sorority, I can tell you that the members of ABC sorority are going to know if she doesn't have the best intentions for joining this sorority. It will be apparant that she hasn't done any research, or that she hasn't been to any events. All you can do as a friend is encourage her to do research on ALL the NPHC sororities, not just that one, and to also attend some of the chapter's events. If she chooses not to take your advice, then she probably wasnt' that serious about it, and the women in the chapter will pick up on that.

sairose · #12 03-16-2004, 07:09 PM

Hello!

First of all, try talking to her again. Ask her why, other than the colors, she wants to be in the sorority. If she still gives superficial reasons, explain to her the committment a sorority is, what will be expected of her, and how seriously the members take it. Tell her it's not something to do on a whim, but that she'll be making a lifetime committment.

I know a little bit about NPHC intake because 2 of my SAI sisters are also members of Delta Sigma Theta. I know they said that to be considered to go on line, they had to do research first to show their genuine interest. Makes perfect sense to me; why join in org you know nothing about? Besides, why would she want to join a group because of the colors??! She sounds pretty hard to talk to, but definately tell her that YOU can't go on line for her; it has to be a decision that SHE makes. And if SHE is serious about it, then SHE must do the research.

Hope this helps.