Seasonal Greetings

[ann.coulter2]

For My Democratic Friends:

"Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere.

And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishes. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher."


For My Republican Friends:

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

[Kevin]

Anne, you forgot to add a superceding clause... and you might want to consider the advantages of a forum selection and choice of laws clause if you'll be sending that to your liberal friends out of state.

[KSigkid]

Originally Posted by Kevin

Anne, you forgot to add a superceding clause... and you might want to consider the advantages of a forum selection and choice of laws clause if you'll be sending that to your liberal friends out of state.

Which may or may not be upheld by the courts, depending on the wording of the clause and the underlying reasons.

(yes, I'm stuck inside studying CivPro)

[valkyrie]

[Tom Earp]

Originally Posted by valkyrie

Only post that made sense so far!

People who wear black belong in funeral parlors!

[shinerbock]

Tom, no offense, but are you a native of this country?

[Starofsorrow]

Very nice seasonal greetings! Still confusing for the democrats....but then again, when has anyone ever been clear?

[KSig RC]

Originally Posted by shinerbock

Tom, no offense, but are you a native of this country?

AWESOME.

[EE-BO]

Originally Posted by shinerbock

Tom, no offense, but are you a native of this country?

He ain't no native, he was born here.

[macallan25]

Originally Posted by Tom Earp

Only post that made sense so far!

Irony at its finest.

[SOPi_Jawbreaker]

Originally Posted by EE-BO

He ain't no native, he was born here.

No, I'm pretty sure he came over on the Mayflower.

[sdsuchelle]

TL;DR

(my new favorite internet saying)

Harry Baals wishes each of you a Happy Holidays!

[kddani]

OTW that is gross

My thought when I saw the title, why are spices saying hello to us?

[honeychile]

I received something similar:

What the Politically Correct Christmas Card says....

Best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most joyous traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, but with respect for the religious persuasion of others who choose to practice their own religion as well as those who choose not to practice a religion at all;

Additionally,

a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions have helped make our society great, without regard to the race, creed, color, religious, or sexual preferences of the wishes.

(Disclaimer: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others and no responsibility for any unintended emotional stress these greetings may bring to those not caught up in the holiday spirit.)