How did you know?

[torn01]

I am so confused right now!!! I have chosen 2 sororities that I would like to be a part of. My problem is that it's still between two!! I am still trying to narrow it down to the one that is right for me. I was wondering, how did YOU know that your fraternity or sorority was the right one for you? Was it something that someone said or did? Not looking for an answer--just interested in others experiences.

[twinstars]

have you actually even started rush? if not, don't lose sleep worrying over this yet--as far as you know, those two houses that you're thinking about won't even invite you back for prefs. don't worry about making your final decision until after your last pref party! your opinions on the houses can change a lot during rush week... and also be aware that the sororities get a say in whether or not they think you'll make a good sister. the houses that you're thinking about may have already 'decided' (for various sort-of dumb reasons) that you aren't a top choice. the selection process is really fickle... you'll understand once you see it from the inside. so it's not even worth worrying about deciding where you think you belong before rush has started...

***some things for you to consider AFTER PREFS:

--which other rushees might be in your pledge class (look around and notice who's at your pref parties)

--which upperclass girls you've gotten to be friends with, beyond the superficial rush context

--which sorority seems less clique-y within itself

--the general reputations of the groups (once you pledge, their rep becomes YOUR rep, so make sure it's something you can live with for three or four years)

i think it's really rare that a rushee will be perfectly split between her top two choices. you've almost GOT to like one a little more than the other. once you've been through the pref parties, it's really not hard to decide at all.

good luck! i hope this post didn't sound really negative but i'm just trying to let you know how unpredictable the rush process can be... don't go into the week with your heart already set on one or two houses.

[This message has been edited by twinstars (edited December 20, 2000).]

[ztafairy]

Twinstars is right. You will know where you belong and where you want to be a sister by the second to last day of rush. I did. I knew a couple of the sisters before I even went through rush.
My biological sister is a Zeta and she was actually a Rho Chi when I was going through. That was really difficult b/c I didn't want to disappoint her but at the same time I wanted to keep an open mind. But I ended up going ZTA. It was tough to choose though. I wouldn't trade it for the world!
As twinstars said, you may not even get into your top two picks. I served on the Panhellenic Council on my campus and saw a handful of girls who knew where they wanted to go on the first day and when they were cut by them, they were devastated but went on with rush and they're now in a sorority that they love. That happened to one of our girls. She cried and cried the day she received her bid but now she serves on our Executive Council and loves being a Zeta. All I can tell you is keep an open mind about the other sororities b/c you never know what will happen during rush. I don't mean to scare you but it's true. But every rush is different. Do you hang out with some of the sisters from your top two choices? You're going to have the time of your life during rush. Have fun and don't stress out too much! Happy Holidays!

[Kymberleigh]

I think looking at the sisterhood of the org is very important. If the women interact with each other as more than just acquaintances. Personnally I knew right away where I wanted to call home. However, if your questioning where you want to be, then don't chose until your positive. Get to know the girls in that house better. Make that extra effort.

Kymberleigh
Delta Epsilon
Delta Delta Delta

[OhioState_TriDelt]

First of all I believe everything happens for a reason...

Second of all I knew Tri-Delt was right for me when I spent my time talking about real things with them during rush, I wasn't nervous, and I kept looking forward to going back there...the real point I remembered being able to laugh with everyone...I could never imagine being in another house now...

[33girl]

I knew at my org's preference night. I was torn between 2 sororities also, but pref night just clinched it for me. They were both very sentimental but at mine I just "knew." Corny as this sounds it is like when you truly fall in love - you just know and it is very hard to put into words.

I DEFINITELY knew for sure when I was waiting for pledge pickup (you found out which org you were in when they knocked on your dorm-room door) and thought to myself "Oh $#%@, I hope it's not XYZ!" It wasn't.