A question for the fellas

[daffodils]

So there's this guy that I dated while an undergrad. (I broke up with him after 6mo) It ended amicably, and we kept in touch sporadically. In the meantime, I got married and divorced, and reconnected with him by chance when I realized I was going to the city where he lives for a meeting. Since then, we talk every single day (he calls me 90% of the time), text message a lot, and chat about anything and everything.

That was over a year and a half ago.

Yes, he lives in another city far from me....but we have SUCH a connection and SO much in common! Like I said, we talk all the time, and even um, well, you know....things that I didn't do before I was married b/c I was a virgin....

Yes he says we're "just friends." Is he just clueless or insensitive over how he's making me feel?

[Tom Earp]

LOVE or CRANIAL RECTOSIS!

DUDE, You Just dont get it!

Sorry, but say See Ya!

[starang21]

Originally posted by daffodils
So there's this guy that I dated while an undergrad. (I broke up with him after 6mo) It ended amicably, and we kept in touch sporadically. In the meantime, I got married and divorced, and reconnected with him by chance when I realized I was going to the city where he lives for a meeting. Since then, we talk every single day (he calls me 90% of the time), text message a lot, and chat about anything and everything.

That was over a year and a half ago.

Yes, he lives in another city far from me....but we have SUCH a connection and SO much in common! Like I said, we talk all the time, and even um, well, you know....things that I didn't do before I was married b/c I was a virgin....

Yes he says we're "just friends." Is he just clueless or insensitive over how he's making me feel?

he's in a pretty good position right now

[wrigley]

He's not clueless. He told you that he thinks of you as a friend. Because you are choosing to have sex with him, that means it's a "friends with benefits" situation.

You may have a "connection" because of the daily electronic contact but after a year and a half it sounds like he's been exploring other options. It's a possibility that he's being "friendly" with other women in his town.

[daffodils]

Thanks for the feedback. I've talked to some other guy-friends (REAL friends, not friends-with-bennies), and they're basically giving me same advice. I wanted to post here and get some feedback from folks who don't know me to see what others would say.

I'm working on the "dear John" letter/conversation that he'll be getting/hearing very soon.