How did you know?

bucutie02 · #1 12-11-2000, 11:24 PM

Hey everyone! I just wanted to know how you knew what sorority/fraternity was right for you? Like why did you pick ABC over the rest? What was so special about it? I guess i just want to know since its getting closer to me rushing!!

Honeybee · #2 12-12-2000, 12:43 AM

Awe, this reminds me of what I was going through a couple of months ago. It is a huge decision, and I think everyone worries about picking the right sorority or fraternity. I know that this might not help too much, but you just kind of know where you would fit in at. I wasn't sure where I belonged until we had the preference ceremony. After that I just felt so connected to all the sisters, and I just kind of had this feeling that I would belong there. Before rush some people told me to pick the house where you feel the most comfortable and where you can truly be yourself. It is so true, and you will just kind of have this feeling telling you what sorority to pick. The strange thing that happened to me was that I picked Delta Zeta (their colors are pink and green) and my whole room was decorated in pink and green. I kind of thought it was a sign telling me I belonged there...and it might have been because it has been one of the best decisions I have ever made, and I have never been happier.

dzjusty · #3 12-12-2000, 03:08 PM

Honeybee- I know exactly how you feel! Welcome to our sisterhood!!

SoCalGirl · #4 12-13-2000, 01:12 AM

Okay, everyone who had the colors thing happen to them raise their hand!

My favorite color since I was a lil girl is one of my sorority colors. I've lost count of how many other girls I know had this happen to them. (And they didn't pick the chapter based on the colors!)

There's a member of my chapter that one year before she ever considered pledging I happened to see her room. Decked out in our colors and flower. She then happened to mention her hometown. It's a tiny town in NorCal. Our chapter happens to have an unusually high number of girls from there.

So I looked her in the eye and with a straight face told her "You're destined to be in my sorority!!!" She laughed it off and said she'd never go greek.

I was so excited when we initiated her. I kept telling her afterwards "I told you so!!"

shopgirl · #5 12-13-2000, 02:44 AM

My favorite color since childhood has been lavender. I thought it seemed silly, but that was one of the things that made me feel comfortable with my choice. BTW, I'm a Sigma Kappa. So I can completely relate.

bucutie02 · #6 12-13-2000, 10:08 AM

thanks everyone for responding- you have been really helpful. What about if I dont get a bid from my number one sorority, but do get one from a different one. Should I accept that bid? Of course, if i didnt feel comfortable with them then of course i wont, but what if they were okay, just not my top choice?

CutiePie2000 · #7 12-13-2000, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by bucutie02:
What about if I dont get a bid from my number one sorority, but do get one from a different one.

Should I accept that bid? Of course, if I didn't feel comfortable with them then of course I won't, but what if they were okay, just not my top choice?

bucutie02, there are a lot of women out there who got their #2 or #3 choice and are pleased as can be. I think the important thing is listen to your heart.

When you are attending the Recruitment functions with the sororities, that are your #2, #3, #4 choices at the time, ask yourself, "Would I be happy here? Or would I be wishing I was in QQQ sorority?" To be honest with you, when I went through Recruitment, there were 5/7 groups on campus that I felt I would have been happy in and could "see myself" in. Sometimes, the difference between choice #1 and choice #2 is vast, other times, there is only a very slight gap between choice #1 and choice #2.

People have said, "You'll know where you belong, it's something you feel", but to be honest, it has not been so clear cut for me.

That being said, when you fill out your bid card, only put down sororities that you would want to belong to, or can see yourself being happy in. (I cannot stress this enough). This is because when you write down your sorority choices and sign your name to that Bid Card, that basically means that:
"I, bucutie, will accept an invitation to membership (if extended to me) by the above sororities".

If none of them bid you, then at least you are still eligible for COR (formerly known as COB).

Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT write down the name of a sorority on your bid card that you do NOT wish to affiliate it with. If they should bid you (which is always a possibility if you have written them down on your bid card) and you decline that bid, then you can't go Greek for an entire year. This can be agony! Same with "intentional preference" (i.e. "suicide bid"), if you don't get a bid from that one sorority, you can't go Greek for an ENTIRE YEAR...so try not to do that either, if you can.

Another thing to consider is, sometimes girls pledge sororities and then up wishing in their heart of hearts that they were in one of the other ones on campus.

Hope that this helped you.

bucutie02 · #8 12-13-2000, 09:53 PM

thanks for all the great advice to all of you! the only thing is that I am going through informal rush where we dont have preference night or bid day. My best friend was telling me that she knew which one she wanted to be in on preference day when they did the ceremony, but in informal rush we dont have that!! Anyone out there go through informal rush- how did you know?

twinstars · #9 12-14-2000, 01:18 AM

sometimes it's wise to trust the sororities' judgment... if you don't get a bid from number 1 but number 2 wants you, i would strongly suggest that you accept the bid. it's really hard during rush to determine which sorority is honestly, truly the best one for you. it's easy to get false impressions of what the groups are really like on the inside, since rush is so superficial and the reputations that you hear about often don't tell the full story of what the house is like.

personally, i got my bid from the house that i listed as second on my pref card, and now i couldn't imagine myself in the house that i had listed first. i loved the first house during rush, but now, a year later, i know so much more about what that sorority actually is, and i'm not impressed. the house that i ended up in was great all through rush... but they had a reputation for being all athletes (which i'm not) and they are considered 'better' than the other house i preffed... so i always just assumed they'd cut me... but they never did. they thought i'd fit in, and they were right.

if you get a bid from your second choice, i would recommend that you go with it. if you like a house enough to list it on your pref card, and they think you'd make a great new sister, then why not?

kappagirl00 · #10 12-14-2000, 01:18 AM

Hey BUCutie~

First of all, lucky you to be going through informal rush!! I've heard it can be a lot less stressful and a lot more fun than formal rush! I went through formal rush, but I still thought I could offer some words of advice. First of all, my mind was basically made up before Pref round. I knew that Kappa was where I wanted to be. All through Rush, they were the girls I felt the most at ease around. They were very friendly and seemed to take a genuine interest in me. One of the other houses I preffed at only seemed to want me because they were desperate to make quota. Remember the quote, "If you love something, set it free, and if it comes back, it's meant to be?" Well, this certainly seemed to apply at Kappa. While the girl who preffed me wanted to convince me to go Kappa, she also cared about my happiness in a sorority and at college. I'm sure that thorugh informal rush, you'll meet girls like this at one house. I know it sounds cheesy and cliche, but you'll just know which house is right for you. You get a feeling.

As for the color/flower thing, this happened to me too! All my life, I have loved irises. I think they are the most beautiful flowers! Because our flower, the fleur-de-lis, is a mythical flower and not a real one, the iris is often used in its place at special occasions. At pref night, when one of the girls handed me an iris, I wanted to jump up out of my seat right then and exclaim, "It's fate!"

Anwyay, I want to wish you the best of luck for a happy and successful rush!! I hope that you will find a house that makes you as happy as KKG makes me!!!

kappagirl00 · #11 12-14-2000, 01:25 AM

I also wanted to add a comment about suicide bidding. I agree that writing down a house you don't like is not a good idea. You want to leave your options open for a snap bid, because it is quite possible that your first choice might snap bid you later on.

On the other hand, if your school has a large greek system and uses computers to match bids, things get complicated. At my school, single-preference cards are NOTORIOUS for causing computer gliches. I know a girl who suicided at my sorority, and while she was very much wanted by the house, got cut because of a computer error. The house later snap bidded her. You might want to ask how bid-matching works and if such problems have been known to happen at your school.

ChiOKitty · #12 12-14-2000, 02:36 AM

I knew that I was meant to be a Chi Omega at pref night when they read us the symphony. It brought me to tears because it is exactly how I want to live my life. Also, I felt right at home with the fun, intelligent, and beautiful girls at XO. I have taken those words to heart and will always live by the symphony! GO CHI O!!!
"To live constantly above snobbery of word or deed..."

bucutie02 · #13 12-17-2000, 03:08 PM

Well my favorite color is pink so maybe with that entire color thing, Delta Zeta and Phi Mu is something i can relate to. Although, my favorite animal is the rabbit/bunny so then Zeta comes in to play there. I absolutely love angels too, so there is alpha chi omega. Its just cute how there is something about almost every sorority on campus here that has a color/mascot i like!

bucutie02 · #14 12-17-2000, 03:10 PM

oh and honeybee... earlier this semester I painted on with a wall stencil some vines with roses along the top border of my room, and they are green vines with pink roses! So my room is in DZ colors!

#15 12-17-2000, 04:24 PM

In the Fall of 99 I was then pledging a local sorority at my campus. One night after countless hours of name calling and emotional put downs (typical pledge treatment) I was at our campus commons sitting on the stairs crying, because this was not why I wanted to be a greek. To me, a person shouldn't have to be put through that kind of treatment to prove how much she wants to be a part of a sorority.

Lo and behold the Alpha Gamma Delta chapter meeting had just let out and four AGD sisters (one of whom I knew) rushed to my side and asked what was wrong. I told them how bad things were going with the sorority I was pledging

and they couldn't believe what was going on. AGD is the only Panhellenic greek on campus and the rest are locals. While they didn't say anything to disrespect my former sorority, they made it clear that they had no right to treat me that way. Needless to say, I depledged from that awful circle of girls.

I then met more and more AGDs who tried to get in through COB, but I decided that because I missed weeks of frat ed it wouldn't be fair to the girls who started from the beginning. I told them that I would definitely be back for spring informal rush, and joining AGD was one of the best decisions I've ever made.

Whew...and that's how I knew AGD was the right one for me!

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*I'm an Alpha Gam...Yes I am, Yes I am!*