family spats over the holidays :ugh:

[tld221]

in similar vein to the "dealing with someone you cant stand"
(didnt wanna hijack that thread)
and dont see this as "random thread" material...

i cant stand my brother. we have history, but he went through some stuff in the past few years that really changed him for the worse. he knows i dont really like him, but its something we really dont talk about. when i come home, we give a simple "hey whats up" and thats it. when i call home, i dont speak to him.

as of late (being this past afternoon-i went home for the holiday) i go to my purse and notice $20 missing. my brother is known around the house as a thief, and everyone accepts it. my mom's response was, "i told you to hide your purse..."

i called him on it, and he hung up on me. i dont ever want to go home again--why should i feel unsafe at home? (p.s. he's stolen larger amounts from my mom and sister, including my sister's cell phone last year) he's 16, has no job, doesnt go to school, and a whole list of things i dont approve of but isnt really my place to dictate over.

my mom is like, someone needs to tell him its not okay to steal... but isnt that fundamental? i learned that when i was growing up--did that get lost in translation in the 5 year difference? WTF???? and since when is stealing from family OK?

clearly im PO'ed.

[uksparkle]

What a bad situation to be in. As hard as it may be, maybe it's best if you stop going home. Let your parents know that he is the reason. Your absence will be a constant reminder that he is causing issues within the family. Hopefully, your mom will break him of these bad habits before he hits 18 and will be held accountable for his actions.

[AchtungBaby80]

Wait, your mom sounds pretty lax about his stealing!! If my parents (who are, granted, probably overly strict) found out that me or my sisters had stolen money like that, there'd be Hell to pay. I think you should take the advice given by the poster above and not go home, but explain to your parents exactly why you've made that decision.

[sageofages]

Walked in those shoes...with my son.

Wake up call came when he broke into our house recently and we had him arrested.

Your mom needs to wake up and smell the coffee...she isn't doing him any favors by turning a blind eye to his problems. Sure it is easier to not do anything but in the long run it makes life a hell of a lot harder.

I would tell your mom she is making a choice..yes I know this sounds harsh...but she is choosing your brother's theivery over her relationship with you (and her relationship with him).

Until she makes a stand nothing will change. The stress is not worth it.