Why do many girls feel threatend by strip clubs and strippers?

James · #1 09-14-2005, 10:58 PM

I always wondered why many girls feel threatened by strip clubs?

I use the word threatened because the usual reaction is too strong for it to be a simple matter of not wanting to go there themselves.

There are several reasons why i believe you may feel threatened.

I always thought it was because collectively women decide social norms.

And that women also tend to be competitve among themselves for the attention of men.

I have also noticed that women try to keep other women under control socially with a narrow range of approved behaviors . . especially in regards with dealing with men sexually and romantically.

In fact women control other women almost like they do in Formal Rush . . they try to make it so no one has too much of a social advantage . . they will help women that are having lots of problems and tend to be catty towards women that have too much of an advantage.

So I always though strip bars represented a place where men could go that the normal rules of male/female sexuality were not only suspended, but totally out of the control of women that are constantly influencing each other about what is or is not acceptable.

Its a place of unbridled sensuality, or at least the illusion of such.

Anwyay, I'm just a guy. So you tell me, why are so many women threatened by strip clubs and strippers?

valkyrie · #2 09-14-2005, 11:08 PM

Eh, I don't consider myself threatened by strip clubs, but then, I'm not with a guy who goes to them.

Honestly, I really do not get the point of strip clubs. Do guys get turned on at them? If so, WTF is the point of getting all hot and bothered while out with your buddies? What do you do then? Are you all like "Yeah dude gotta go" and run to your car to rub one out before heading home? If they don't get turned on, what's the point? Is it just background entertainment? Something to do? A boost for fragile egos?

Pls. explain.

ETA: To try to answer your question, I think a lot of it has to do with two main factors: (1) women can be insecure, and (2) men can be kind of stupid.

UKDaisy · #3 09-14-2005, 11:12 PM

I feel you hit the nail on the head. A lot of women try to express their hatred of strip clubs or celebs by claiming "they just don't like them". But I feel its an issue of being threatened. I think each of us feel threatened in our own way in different situations. And this is clearly one of them.

This is a great subject and I'd love to hear how so-called self-confident girls respond to this.

CSUSigEp · #4 09-14-2005, 11:23 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie
Honestly, I really do not get the point of strip clubs. Do guys get turned on at them? If so, WTF is the point of getting all hot and bothered while out with your buddies? What do you do then? Are you all like "Yeah dude gotta go" and run to your car to rub one out before heading home? If they don't get turned on, what's the point? Is it just background entertainment? Something to do? A boost for fragile egos?

Pls. explain.

Theres boobs we havent seen yet there.

BobbyTheDon · #5 09-14-2005, 11:24 PM

Quote:

Honestly, I really do not get the point of strip clubs.

It's so we can see ...Please see the second part of my signature.

Quote:

Do guys get turned on at them?

Well I do, but Jestor doesn't. But then again Jestor* wants to be a wedding planner.

Quote:

If so, WTF is the point of getting all hot and bothered while out with your buddies?

I don't know

...you ask too many questions.

winnieb · #6 09-14-2005, 11:26 PM

I think the typical line you will hear from alot of women is that strip clubs exploit women.... my opinion that is a load of crap. I have heard very few women tell the truth, the women who are threatened by strippers are insecure with themselves and scared their men will not want them anymore. Not many women will admit they are insecure though--so you hear excuses like it is sexist, exploits, etc.

ETA: I am pretty self confident--yes I have things I would change about myself--- but who cares about strip clubs--- if you have the body to work there, good for you--go exploit those men who are willing to shove cash into your g-string-more power to you! I have been to several strip clubs---yes their asses are smaller than mine- who cares. If the person I am with has an issue and wants to compare me and make me feel bad then he can screw off-- I don't need that. And I will say strip clubs can be entertaining. I have had bday parties there, had lots of fun and also have cocktail waitressed at a strip club too-- there is nothing wrong with them!

amycat412 · #7 09-14-2005, 11:31 PM

I am not threatened by strip clubs. I just don't see the point when the guy has ME in his life.

I've gone to them before. I know I am hotter.

AGDee · #8 09-15-2005, 12:39 AM

I'm from a different generation than a lot of posters here, but for most women in my generation, I would explain it this way:

We are not as casual about nudity and sexuality as men. We associate nudity and sexuality with emotional intimacy. We don't understand why or how men separate nudity and sexuality from emotional intimacy and probably don't really believe that they can (although they definitely do!). We are operating on different premises. Our premises:

1. Physical intimacy is associated with emotional intimacy.
2. Strippers are physically intimate with men.

Therefore, men who want to go strip clubs want to be emotionally intimate with the strippers. This threatens our relationship with the men. We want them to hold the same value in the sharing of physical intimacy that we do.

Conversely, if men CAN separate the physical intimacy from emotional intimacy, then the emotional intimacy we think we are expressing when are sexual with "our" men is actually meaningless to them.

That is also threatening to our relationship.

There are women who are able to make that separation and/or understand that men can make that separation but still recognize that physical intimacy combined with emotional intimacy is more special, but that physical intimacy in that limited capacity can be harmless and fun for men... but not many.

Dee

a.e.B.O.T. · #9 09-15-2005, 01:20 AM

i dont understand it, but its good to respect people's shyness around nudity. I think in society today, if a girl isnt innocent, shes called a slut. So, there is this need to stay innocent. Its wrong, and we should all dance around naked, but that just isnt the way our society works

#10 09-15-2005, 01:48 AM

I am not threatened by strip clubs. I've gone to many of them as I have many friends who work in them. I see it as just any other typical bar. As long as my friends don't shove their chachachas in my face I'm all good. I don't mind spending $$$ there.

LightBulb · #11 09-15-2005, 02:31 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AGDee
1. Physical intimacy is associated with emotional intimacy.
2. Strippers are physically intimate with men.

Therefore, men who want to go strip clubs want to be emotionally intimate with the strippers. This threatens our relationship with the men.

Yea but I don't want my man to be "physically intimate" with anyone else either..

I'm may be old-fashioned (I'm 20), but I don't think I'll ever understand why going to a strip club is so socially acceptable.

But then, most of my many guy friends are what you would call the "nice guys".

cashmoney · #12 09-15-2005, 08:45 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by amycat412
I am not threatened by strip clubs. I just don't see the point when the guy has ME in his life. I've gone to them before. I know I am hotter.

What, are you going to come home from work and strip down bare nakked for me and bend over and let me see that pussy shake while wearing those stripper heels? I don't think so.

-Thats why I like strip clubs.

KSigkid · #13 09-15-2005, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie
Eh, I don't consider myself threatened by strip clubs, but then, I'm not with a guy who goes to them.

Honestly, I really do not get the point of strip clubs. Do guys get turned on at them? If so, WTF is the point of getting all hot and bothered while out with your buddies? What do you do then? Are you all like "Yeah dude gotta go" and run to your car to rub one out before heading home? If they don't get turned on, what's the point? Is it just background entertainment? Something to do? A boost for fragile egos?

Pls. explain.

ETA: To try to answer your question, I think a lot of it has to do with two main factors: (1) women can be insecure, and (2) men can be kind of stupid.

I'm not a frequent visitor (only been once, in Montreal), so maybe I'm not the best person to comment, but...

It just is what it is - a place to go with a bunch of the guys, just entertainment. I don't think anything has to be read too much into it.

WCUgirl · #14 09-15-2005, 09:11 AM

I'll admit that when I was younger (like, before the age of 18ish), I was threatened by them. But, that was before I had been in one. I think it also was because I was insecure back then.

cashmoney · #15 09-15-2005, 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AXiD670
I was insecure back then.

Insecure.......

All of you women out there that are using this word in relation to fears of strip clubs, stop lying. Why don't you all just say you thought you were fat or ugly in comparison to the women there until you actually saw some of those women. "Well I just felt insecure about my man going to those places" You didnt think you were hot enough and were afraid your man would meet someone hotter than you and dip out.

-The only women who don't fear strip clubs are the ones who know they have their man locked down or can find someone better should he decide to leave.