really sucky situation

christiangirl · #1 08-20-2005, 02:46 AM

My cousin and her boyfriend of 2-3 years just broke up about a week and a half ago. It was mutual and they agreed it's more of taking a break than anything. If they don't get back together, she says she'll survive, but she is almost positive they will and she wants to marry him someday, but until then they need a break from each other. Well, I ran into an old friend the other day and she mentioned seeing him (the 3 of us all went to the same school). When I told her he had been in a relationship with my cousin just 1.5 weeks ago, she told me to talk to my cousin because he'd been pushing up on her HARD when she ran into him 3 weeks ago. He asked her out and she told him no. She pushed me to tell my cousin, since she's so sure they're getting back together, but I said no way, I'm staying out of this one. I'm not banking on him cheating if they get back together, but now I know that given the opportunity, there's a good chance he would. Did I make the right choice not to tell her? I don't want to get in the middle of this, but if they get back together, I don't want her getting hurt either.

AGDee · #2 08-20-2005, 09:46 AM

I would keep the information to myself if I were you. There were obviously factors that led to them taking a break and they are probably the same factors that led to him asking this other girl out. Or, it was his realization that his doing that was wrong that led him to wanting to take a break. Or, he called a break to try to cover his tracks because he's already done something and can confuse the timing "We were on a break!"(ala Friends).

I'm always curious about the dynamics of needing a break from each other but wanting to marry the person. Once you're married, there are no breaks. The person is always there, always around you and you just can't take breaks. I would suspect that he presented it as a "break" as an easy way out and that the break will end up being permanent. Let her come to that realization on her own.

christiangirl · #3 08-20-2005, 08:27 PM

That's what I was thinking (not in so many words, but still right). Okay, I feel better now.

christiangirl · #4 08-22-2005, 12:11 AM

Dang, they got back together 3 days ago. But I just found out that they actually broke up about 5 weeks ago, she just told me about it a week and a half ago. So I suppose it really wasn't a big deal.