What would you say/do?

PerfectPearl · #1 11-18-2005, 12:56 AM

I was cleaning my home office (i.e. putting more paraphenalia in it) and my husband's cell phone rang...he forgot it at home. We were waiting on a call from FEMA and so I answered it. The person hung up. I caled the number back and she denied calling the number and even went so far as to ask her sister if she called. I told her who I was, who my husband was, and she denied knowing him. The next day I was cleaning the office again and she called on my home phone and said she was sorry that she did in fact know my husband but was a coward. She said as one Black Woman to the next she respected me and the only thing she could tell me without my husband being a part of the conversation is yes she knew him...

emeraldAKA99 · #2 11-18-2005, 04:49 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by PerfectPearl
I was cleaning my home office (i.e. putting more paraphenalia in it) and my husband's cell phone rang...he forgot it at home. We were waiting on a call from FEMA and so I answered it. The person hung up. I caled the number back and she denied calling the number and even went so far as to ask her sister if she called. I told her who I was, who my husband was, and she denied knowing him. The next day I was cleaning the office again and she called on my home phone and said she was sorry that she did in fact know my husband but was a coward. She said as one Black Woman to the next she respected me and the only thing she could tell me without my husband being a part of the conversation is yes she knew him...

she had your home phone number as well...

are you hesitant to ask your husband about it directly?
this sux, because she left you with more questions than answers...

Professor · #3 11-18-2005, 09:27 AM

why do women claim they respect each other when one has slept with the other's husband.

the man is your husband. ask him any damn thing you want. are you scared. does he beat you. if so, give me his number and i will ask him for you and see if he tries to beat me.

AlphaFrog · #4 11-18-2005, 09:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Professor
the man is your husband. ask him any damn thing you want. are you scared. does he beat you. if so, give me his number and i will ask him for you and see if he tries to beat me.

Amen for the strong men.

soulfulremix · #5 11-18-2005, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Professor
why do women claim they respect each other when one has slept with the other's husband.

the man is your husband. ask him any damn thing you want. are you scared. does he beat you. if so, give me his number and i will ask him for you and see if he tries to beat me.

I did just that while reading this post. Soror, speak to him because there are only so many answers she will be able to give you. And if you do feel like he's going to act a fool, round up Professor and some of your linesisters.

slight hijack, but I hate cowards!!

PerfectPearl · #6 11-18-2005, 10:00 AM

I love my Sorors!!! She went on to say that she had met him at a professional convention and that they were "business" associates at first. I kept pressing her gently, all the while hammering nails into the wall to hang paraphenalia. I'm actually surprised I was so calm, but I figured I could get more info from her. Anyhoo, she said after I told her she was being too vague and to just come out and say what she had to say since she respected me so much. So I asked her, "Are you/did you sleep with my husband?" She said all I can say is "I know him". I asked her if she was a Christian and she said yes. So I told her that the Bible says to avoid even the appearance of sin, so if she didn't do anything wrong why all the lies. She started talking about how she wasn't perfect and that she and my husband had really "clicked" and she had a husband too and he doesn't like her having male friends, he doesn't trust her. I said, maybe he has a reason to (couldn't resist). Anyhoo, I told her to have a good day "sweetie" and she replied in a strange tone you too "honey". I called my husband he didn't answer the cell phone and she called me back...

Professor · #7 11-18-2005, 10:09 AM

Call Cheaters

AlphaFrog · #8 11-18-2005, 10:12 AM

Well, you seemed to have handled it in a classy way. I don't think I could have been that calm.

Greek love and support!!!

onlyme · #9 11-18-2005, 10:26 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by PerfectPearl
I love my Sorors!!! She went on to say that she had met him at a professional convention and that they were "business" associates at first. I kept pressing her gently, all the while hammering nails into the wall to hang paraphenalia. I'm actually surprised I was so calm, but I figured I could get more info from her. Anyhoo, she said after I told her she was being too vague and to just come out and say what she had to say since she respected me so much. So I asked her, "Are you/did you sleep with my husband?" She said all I can say is "I know him". I asked her if she was a Christian and she said yes. So I told her that the Bible says to avoid even the appearance of sin, so if she didn't do anything wrong why all the lies. She started talking about how she wasn't perfect and that she and my husband had really "clicked" and she had a husband too and he doesn't like her having male friends, he doesn't trust her. I said, maybe he has a reason to (couldn't resist). Anyhoo, I told her to have a good day "sweetie" and she replied in a strange tone you too "honey". I called my husband he didn't answer the cell phone and she called me back...

Ummm, are you going to finish the story?? What did she say? Have you spoken to your husband?

AKA2D '91 · #10 11-18-2005, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by PerfectPearl
I was cleaning my home office (i.e. putting more paraphenalia in it) and my husband's cell phone rang...he forgot it at home. We were waiting on a call from FEMA

Sidenote:
My FEMA adjuster JUST came to inspect my place Tuesday.

darling1 · #11 11-18-2005, 11:54 AM

i have NO PROBLEM confronting my husband on anything. you need to deal with him and forget..for now...this broad.

Quote:

Originally posted by Professor
why do women claim they respect each other when one has slept with the other's husband.

the man is your husband. ask him any damn thing you want. are you scared. does he beat you. if so, give me his number and i will ask him for you and see if he tries to beat me.

emeraldAKA99 · #12 11-18-2005, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by darling1
i have NO PROBLEM confronting my husband on anything. you need to deal with him and forget..for now...this broad.

Co-sign. Twice.

nachural · #13 11-18-2005, 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PerfectPearl
I called my husband he didn't answer the cell phone and she called me back...

does this mean she had is cell phone? like were they together? What did she call back and say

My advice...think whether you trust your hubby or not and whether he would tell you the truth about any situation. If they clicked as much as she says they did then she would have already told him about your little convo with her and he should be smart enough to talk to you about it before long. He may try to make it look as innocent as possible and he may be telling the truth, it'll be up to you whether you believe it was innocent or whether the reason he was hiding it is because he knew it would make you uncomfy

. Give him time to talk to you about it and after as long as you can wait

confront him.

good luck soror

Gyrl7 · #14 11-18-2005, 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PerfectPearl
I love my Sorors!!! She went on to say that she had met him at a professional convention and that they were "business" associates at first. I kept pressing her gently, all the while hammering nails into the wall to hang paraphenalia. I'm actually surprised I was so calm, but I figured I could get more info from her. Anyhoo, she said after I told her she was being too vague and to just come out and say what she had to say since she respected me so much. So I asked her, "Are you/did you sleep with my husband?" She said all I can say is "I know him". I asked her if she was a Christian and she said yes. So I told her that the Bible says to avoid even the appearance of sin, so if she didn't do anything wrong why all the lies. She started talking about how she wasn't perfect and that she and my husband had really "clicked" and she had a husband too and he doesn't like her having male friends, he doesn't trust her. I said, maybe he has a reason to (couldn't resist). Anyhoo, I told her to have a good day "sweetie" and she replied in a strange tone you too "honey". I called my husband he didn't answer the cell phone and she called me back...

I wouldn't put it past him to have been there while she was talking to you. She definitely slept with him and more than once. If you asked me if I slept with your husband I can come out and tell you NO! However Miss Thingaling can only tell you "I know him" and "they really clicked", which to me sounds like a yes. I'd knowingly click him upside the head with a hard biskitt or start making some hot grits! Here you are worrying about your house while he's at someone else's. Definitely confront him because if you don't it will only eat away at you. Lawd Jesis

futurestar1 · #15 11-18-2005, 01:23 PM

I don't think I would assume anything until you speak to your husband. There are three sides to this story, his, hers, and the truth. You at least have to get his side to even began to speculate the truth.

Your loyalty and alliance is with your husband. Should he have been unfaithful, he would be in the wrong. Exercising fidelity (is that a correct phrase?) is one of his duties as a husband. However, as a wife, you owe it to him to at least get his side of the story.

I wish you much luck. I hope this is some unrequited love problem this chick is having. But it is possible that they began to have an emotional relationship? Would that bother you more than a physical one? You cheat with your heart and mind first, before you ever cheat with your body.