Spank or not to spank?

Tinese · #1 08-24-2000, 02:37 PM

Hello to all of my rhoyal bluetiful sorhors! I have a question to ask. Do you believe in spanking children who need it such as strong willed children or not. I know that children have different personalities which doesn't require that they get spankings because either talking or other form of punishment seem to work best for them. I'm specifically talking about strong willed children because talking to them and placing them on time out does not work and spanking does in conjunction with other punishment such as taking away privleges. So what are your views on this topic.

saying it in 22 ways

Tinese

prettypoodle6 · #2 08-24-2000, 06:45 PM

I got "whoopins" when I was little and think I came out just fine!!!! (Probably better than I would have if my parents didnt keep me in check).

I dont believe in BEATING any defenseless child, but I personally dont see anything wrong with an old fashioned spankin!

RHOyal-Silence · #3 08-24-2000, 08:13 PM

i believe that the discipline should fit the child and the action. some strong willed children need a spanking. i don't think that one should use the child's personality of being strong willed as an excuse for some of things the child does. so give the kid a good swift kick in the a..

EspeRHO · #4 08-24-2000, 09:28 PM

I agree with you prettypoodle6. I got spankings too, and I am a stronger person for it. The question is where do you draw the line between spanking and abuse? Some kids need a spnaking to keep them in line, so RHOyal-Silence I agree with you that the punishment should fit the child.

A_RHOyal_Delight · #5 08-24-2000, 10:27 PM

I got spanked when I was little and you know what, I deserved each and every spanking that I got. The reason why I say this is because I knew that I was doing wrong and most young ones know when they are doing wrong. A good spanking from time to time will not kill a child. Sometimes talking and taking things away is not a strong enough form of punishment and some kids may get used to just sitting in their room with no phone. They'll continue to get into trouble because they will think that they have their parents all figured out, so surprise them and test the flesh.

Delight

CodeBlue_R3 · #6 08-26-2000, 08:12 PM

I would like to say that I believe that spanking children is a way of assuring rules and punishments for such. But it can also teach children that when someone doesn't do as you feel they shouldthen they should result to hitting them.

However, I do feel that had it not been for me getting my regular spankings as a form of correction I probably would not be on the good tract that I am on today. Timeout worked but it wasn't as effective as the "spanking". I mean I was like heck if all I have to do is sit or stand in this corner for doing this then I can serve that time. Another thing was writing sentences I was like this is just going to make my handwriting better than everyone elses. So it was always a way for me to transform my punishments into something else in a state of mind. But when my parents wailed on my behind, there was no getting around that. The clearest message of I won't do that again was loud and clear as possible.

So would I spank my kids?
Yes if it was called for, but I would not spank them for every single episode of something nor would I infringe on there individuality and personality traits. Cause sometimes a good talking to gets the same point across. Trust me that's something you never get away from coming from a family of lawyers. Who knows maybe the child might have a good defense for there actions. You'll never know if the first thing you do it pop them or grab the belt or whatever it is that you hit them with.

BlueReign · #7 08-27-2000, 02:03 PM

The funniest thing about this subject for me is that I was against spankings before I had children myself. I got so many of them that I said I couldn't do that to my own. My niece stayed with me once and I couldn't spank her when she needed one. But when I had my own I had no problem spanking them when they needed it. It does, however, depend on the circumstances and the child. I use time out alot but time out does not always work especially in the middle of a store. So when my children show off in public I have no problem "showing off" on them

RHOyal-Silence · #8 08-28-2000, 12:15 AM

you know, as i think about it, i really start to think if i really could raise my hand to spank my own child. i do not have any children so i cannot honestly say what will happen. but i recieved numerous spankings and turned out terrific(if i may say so myself) but on the other hand i hope to try to find other ways to deal with punishment.
however, i see nothing wrong with spankings, ijust think i could not do it!!

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the sexiest ladies in the world are laced in rubies and pearls.

blu_theatrics · #9 08-28-2000, 09:36 PM

I fully believe that it is not only appropriate, but also absolutely needed for a strong-willed out of line child to be disciplined. We can not sit around and laugh and give our children "timeouts" all the time. There is a place for everything and there are times whn a child needs to be spanked so that they will have an reinforcement of what is right or wrong

lil_sunshine · #10 01-05-2002, 05:55 PM

Spanking are good in situations when it's called for. Sometimes parents go a little overboard with the spankings. I have five godchildren (three girls and two boys), and the most I do to my two oldest goddaughters is pluck them hard enough so that they feel a little pain. After I do that, I know that they won't try to do certain things around me that I wouldn't accept if I had children. I know when I do have children (three at the most), they will be disciplined and well-behaved, as they should be.

volgirl2376 · #11 01-07-2002, 10:29 PM

I believe in spankings. I got them when I was little...not many, but thats because I learned not to do stuff that would make me get one! I remember in church my mom would get on to me for talking...and she would look at me and say "do you wanna go to the car?" I never knew exactly what was in the car...but the heck if I wanted to find out. I too turned out pretty dang good, and I still respect my parents and try not to do anything that they would be ashamed of.

I think people who put their kids in time out...and never put any sort of fear in a child...a fear of real punishment...raise kids that are out of control. I know people who actually look scared of their kids. Come on!

Now Im not talking about beating you kids, hitting them with your fist...or whatever. Im talking about a firm hand on the butt.
It hurts their pride more than it does their butt...but thats how they learn between right and wrong....in my opinion.

SeriousSigma22 · #12 01-08-2002, 08:34 PM

Sorors and sisterfriend,

Sometimes I think if these parents spanked their children when they were younger they wouldn't have such disrepectful teenagers and young adults now. I'm speaking not as a mother but as a high school teacher with 9. 5 years of teaching experience so many of the teenagers that end up getting into serious trouble is because mom and dad spared the rod and spoiled the child. And now they don't know what to do with the grown up monster they created! I'm not an advocate for beating the dickens out of children, however, a little tap now and then could stop them from making unwise decisions down the road at a much later date.

Serioussigma22

sigmaheart2 · #13 01-09-2002, 11:42 AM

Everyone of you had good things to say about the issue at hand and I agree that it shouldn't be taken to the extreme where CPS is on your tail b/c of it. But I can say that I'm glad that i got whoopins (even though they hurt!) but it helps you understand that you can't get your way all the time and that when you do wrong you have to face the consequences as a child you don't really understand that but when you can look back as an adult, you got the lesson that was to be learned (hopefully). I don't have any crumb snatchers but i've got many god children, neices an nephews. One of my girlfriends asked me to baby sit and the kid cut up I told my friend and she made me whoop him. Even though I had to whoop him and did I ever feel bad but he had to get the lesson

kizzie22 · #14 03-24-2002, 01:21 AM

Bring this back to the top...

TRSimon · #15 03-26-2002, 03:02 PM

If they don't learn about your authority, they will have to learn about it through the justice system. If they are given with moderation and balance, spankings can really help kids. Children need to feel that they have boundaries and structure. It helps them feel more secure. Hitting children in anger is wrong, but spanking them (and talking to them and punishing them at other times) is not.