Book: You Didn't Complete Me - When "the one" turns out to be just someone

[dzsaigirl]

This is a very good book. If you have ever been through a serious breakup you should read it. Funny too

You Didn't Complete Me - Joanna Harris

[James]

She sounds a little pathetic. . .

[KillarneyRose]

I don't think she sounds pathetic at all. Of course, though, I did exactly what the woman in the book did when I got together with my husband so it doesn't seem very foreign to me at all. It seems more like he's the one with issues he should have worked out before they moved in together.

[James]

But . . . thats a pretty big misread on her part.

Honestly, its amazing how out of tune some people, both men and women, are with their partners.

ITs almost like people see what they want to see.

[kappaloo]

Originally posted by James
ITs almost like people see what they want to see.

You can take the "almost" out of that sentence. Like that episode of Frasier when they confront Niles with the fact he didn't notice Daphne gain 50 people.

[sugar and spice]

It sounds like there's some stuff she's leaving out, because otherwise his behavior is utterly unexplainable -- it just isn't logical that their relationship would be perfectly great until she got off the airplane, at which point it immediately turned horrible. However, I'm not getting a good vibe from him either. He obviously had doubts about the whole thing much earlier than she did, and who allows someone to fly 1000+ miles to come live with you, with the plan of marrying you, when you're not ready for it?

It sounds like there were some major communication gaps in their relationship -- if you're not at a point where you can talk about the fact that things feel different now that you're in the same city, you sure as hell shouldn't be getting married! The entire time that she keeps complaining about how she couldn't talk to him about what was wrong or that he refused to talk to her about it . . . ummm, there is no way their relationship could be a good one. Communication is key when it comes to relationships, and it sounds like they could barely talk to each other!

Also, I'm not sure that his depression wasn't a much larger issue than they both were making it out to be . . .

[OtterXO]

I agree that women (and men for that matter) sometimes see what they want to see in situations...but he proposed to her, planned a wedding and asked her to move to Boston...what exact reaction did he expect? for her to assume he was iffy about the situation? of course not. any person in their right mind would assume what she assumed.

[33girl]

Never dump everything and move before you are married, or at the very least, before your name is also on the lease. Never, never, never.

[KillarneyRose]

Originally posted by 33girl
Never dump everything and move before you are married, or at the very least, before your name is also on the lease. Never, never, never.

Or before you get a ring that you could hock and support yourself with the money for awhile if you had to!