Need Advice!!!

CASIGKAP · #1 07-26-2004, 10:15 PM

Well, I have this neighbor who's daughter was accepted at CSULB where I attend. Her daughter has her heart set on joining a sorority & I've told her about the 7 sororities we have on campus. I didn't give any real details just their names & that she should check out their national websites b/c only 3 sororoties have chapter websites on our campus.

Now comes the problem. Her mother & her firmly believe that b/c they know me, she'll automatically get a bid from not only Sigma Kappa but also the other sororities on campus. I told them numerous times that I will not give her any preferential treatment (I'd rather pretend I don't know her) & that it's best if she keeps her options open about the other 6 houses b/c they are all phenomenal. They are now asking me to take them on a tour of campus & wanna see our house. They also wanna buy merchandise with letters on it to see which ones they like the best. It's getting weird. I don't know what else to do.

They are starting to freak me out. I don't want to ruin her chances by spreading stories about her before RUSH but I hate the thought that a serious nut like this may actually end up in a house. I have never promised anything but by talking to her, I may have inadvertantly set the ball into motion.

HELP!

smiley21 · #2 07-26-2004, 10:23 PM

did you explain the rush process to her? did you say the whole chapter has to agree on who to accept?
did you explain that only one house can give her a bid?

talk to your sisters about her and to watch her during recruitment. don't you feel obligated to do anything that you do not want to do.

if the girl cannot accept the truth about formal rush then what else can you do? who knows, she might fall in love with another house. cross your fingers!!!

seriously, tell her that you alone cannot decide if she gets in. you can give her a good word, but it is the choice of the chapter. tell her not get her hopes up. if she is still not listening, then well.....

33girl · #3 07-26-2004, 10:31 PM

Tell her that according to Panhellenic rules, you are NOT allowed to have any contact with them, let alone giving them a house tour. As far as the merchandise - do you mean they want to buy something from EACH sorority? At any rate, just tell them that if a sister sees them doing that before she's bid - she can kiss being in a sorority good-bye.

You were just trying to be helpful. If she's as overbearing in person as she seems to be from your post, I don't think you'll have to worry about saying anything.

Or, you could tell them to come post on GC, after this thread is deleted of course.

astroAPhi · #4 07-26-2004, 10:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 33girl
Or, you could tell them to come post on GC, after this thread is deleted of course.

I like this option best!

I think your best way out of this to emphasize the Panhellenic rules about no-contact. Tell her that it would not only get you in trouble, but could jeopardize her chances of getting the house she wants.

And what's so hard about browsing a catalog? Instead you actually have to order the stuff? I mean, I see that she's being weird already, but that's even weirder.

caligrl923 · #5 07-26-2004, 11:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 33girl
Tell her that according to Panhellenic rules, you are NOT allowed to have any contact with them, let alone giving them a house tour.

i agree with this!

if this girl knows that she could be hurting you as well as jeopardizing her own chances, i think she would stop!

the whole merchandise issue confuses me..why would she want to buy stuff from EACH sorority?? shes only going to join one house and when she chooses one, then the rest of the merchandise w/other letters will be useless and meaningless to her..and how can they judge which house they like best by just looking at merchandise?? are they picking which letters look the best on a sweatshirt? thats a little weird

CASIGKAP · #6 07-27-2004, 12:21 AM

I truly don't know why on earth they would be picking letters unless she is trying to see what looks better but that's just bizarre. I did get a kick though hearing her trying to recite the Greek alphabet b/c she wants to have it memorized but her pronunciations are awful. To hear her say some of them is laughable. She also wants to get a list of all NPC sororities b/c she thinks she has to know all 26 of them. I didn't bother to make a comment on this one. I just told her that I can't do anything for her b/c it would jeopardize us both but I did tell her to weigh her options & to also consider taking a year before commiting to something like this b/c freshman year is difficult enough. I hope she listens & takes the time to grow up.

GtownGirl98 · #7 07-27-2004, 09:21 AM

Okay Ladies... she sounds like she is just excited about the whole process. I know when I knew that I was going to "rush" I was all about checking out anything and everything greek. Luckly, I had a year of being a GDI under my belt... so I wasn't that ocd.

Just take as excitment. If you don't want to have your sisters know anything about this girl... don't say anything to them about her or her "excitement".

As to her "thinking" that she will be in the same GLO as you... make sure that she gets a "rush" booklet and that she understands that you are "on the otherside" and that because of this you can't do somethings with them anymore.

I would also not worry about the letters thing... I know that I love to shop and right now I am a little OCD about the "new" things I am getting to shop for (sorry that it is criptic, I haven't announced what I am gettting to "shop" for yet to my sisters!) So as a freshman who loved to shop I know that I would have wanted to look at anything Greek!

I would ask that you not allow FRESHMAN OCD to affect a PNM's chances solly because she is entusicastic... (sorry about spelling)...

That would be my 2 cents!