Help...Any solutions would be great!

[Queencece]

Back on April 30th I when to get a new tattoo. That same day, a good friend of mine calls and says that she is coming up for the weekend. I say cool and picked her up right after I was done getting my tattoo. The tattoo is on my ankle and is on my driving foot. I didn't finish from the tattoo place until late. She came in at 12am that next morning. Well, swollen ankle and all I went out to DC to pick her up from the bus station.

She is STILL HERE!! She never left. Now, I know that she was coming up here to stay and she asked if she could stay for a month and then she will find somewhere to go. Nope, not the case. She shares a room with me. I have the biggest room in the house and the biggest bed. So, naturally she is all in my space.

At first it was cool, but I need my space. She needs to get out. I considered myself to be nice and trying to help someone out, but all I get in return is her attitude.

When her birthday came in June, we had plans for the whole weekend to go out and celebrate. She caught an attitude every night that weekend and I had to put her in her place in front of the company that she had here.

We go through period where we don't even speak to each other and will be in the same room almost all day. I mean I can't have someone come off the street that I am trying to help and they have the audacity to not talk to me like I am the problem.

I even took her to a party with me and she was scheming the whole night doing things behind my back. Once again, I put her in her place and told her not to do that shit again or her ass was mine!!!!

Any suggestions on how to gracefully tell her that she needs to find somewhere to go before I end up in jail.

Q

[Peaches-n-Cream]

Two and a half months is too long, and she is abusing your generosity. Tell her that she needs to find another place to live. Explain to her that her friendship is valuable to you and that living together is impacting it in a negative way. Tell her that you're afraid living together will cost you a friendship. She might be angry, but be firm. Good luck!

[navane]

Yikes, it sounds like you have a real problem on your hands.

First she was coming up for a weekend and then she asked to stay for a month? Is that right? I mean, it's ok to help a friend out for a few weeks, but it sounds like she has stayed much longer than the original agreement.

Is she paying any rent or other contributions? If not, then that's even worse - especially since she's actually in your room.

There's really no easy way out. You'll have to sit her down and gently explain to her that you really need to have your privacy back. Add that she has been in your house for much longer than you had originally agreed. You should give her two weeks to find a new place and then say that will be it. Offer to help drive her to look at apartments or something. You might even nicely explain that you notice that you both have been getting upset with each other and say that you'd hate to ruin a friendship over this. If she gets upset and gets an attitude, oh well. Just remember to keep your cool and don't go off on one at her about "you have an attitude and you're all up in my business....". Be gentle, but firm.

One last note, if she's gotten mail at your house, she might be able to claim residency. If so, she can refuse to leave and then you'd have to start the legal eviction process. I hope it doesn't go that far and that she leaves voluntarily.

Good luck!

.....Kelly

[winneythepooh7]

leave her stuff out front on the steps and change your locks. okay,mean, mean, that's a last resort. confront her and give her a deadline. afterall, it's almost august so she should be able to find somewhere to go by the 1st of the month.............

[navane]

Peaches-n-Cream,

We posted at the same time! Great minds think alike.....

.....Kelly

[Peaches-n-Cream]

Originally posted by navane
Peaches-n-Cream,

We posted at the same time! Great minds think alike.....

.....Kelly

lol! You went into greater depth, but the point is pretty much the same. Get her out, try to save the friendship, and be firm.

This is a really tough situation. I was also thinking what winneythepooh7 wrote. Only as a last resort.