For half a million dollars, would you . . .

Ideal08 · #1 08-16-2001, 03:42 PM

. . . name your child after a product? e.g. Viagra Jones, Maalox Smith, etc.

They were talking about this on the radio earlier this week, and I thought it was hilarious.

Would I do it? Yep. Baby'll just have to go by his/her middle name. But legally, for all intensive purposes and $500,000, I will name him/her after a product.

I was HOLLERIN listenin' to them on the radio:

Pepto Bismol, bring me some water!
Maalox, turn the channel!!

It was funny. I missed the first half of it, so I don't know if this is a real offer or what. I wonder what the ramifications of it are? Like, how long would the child have to keep the name? Hell, at 18, they could just change their name to whatever we had been calling them anyway. All I know is I was dyin'! LOL!

DISCLAIMER: I'm one day from being unemployed, so this seems like a good way to make some extra cash. If I was bringing in a good steady cash flow, I might think about it a little harder.

Steeltrap · #2 08-16-2001, 03:52 PM

Viagra?

LMAO! LMAO! LMAO! LMAO! LMPNGAO!

Seriously, I doubt that I'd hang a child of mine with that name. I wrote extensively about Viagra when it was introduced on the market, and it's still the subject of jokes.

librasoul22 · #3 08-16-2001, 03:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ideal08:
. . . name your child after a product? e.g. Viagra Jones, Maalox Smith, etc.

They were talking about this on the radio earlier this week, and I thought it was hilarious.

Would I do it? Yep. Baby'll just have to go by his/her middle name. But legally, for all intensive purposes and $500,000, I will name him/her after a product.

I was HOLLERIN listenin' to them on the radio:

Pepto Bismol, bring me some water!
Maalox, turn the channel!!

It was funny. I missed the first half of it, so I don't know if this is a real offer or what. I wonder what the ramifications of it are? Like, how long would the child have to keep the name? Hell, at 18, they could just change their name to whatever we had been calling them anyway. All I know is I was dyin'! LOL!

DISCLAIMER: I'm one day from being unemployed, so this seems like a good way to make some extra cash. If I was bringing in a good steady cash flow, I might think about it a little harder.

DAWG, I would name my first THREE children after products!! LOL! Money isn't what my life revolves around, but shoot, it's not physically harmful or anything! Besides, I am sure that I could go to the supermarket and find some products that aren't so bad...

Summer's Eve, get me some ice for my water! (Not that I use this product, a commercial just came on TV for it!)
Frito Lay! Don't bounce your ball in the house! LOL

After I go grocery shopping I will try to find more!

Good topic! LOL

Ideal08 · #4 08-16-2001, 04:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by librasoul22:
DAWG, I would name my first THREE children after products!! LOL! Money isn't what my life revolves around, but shoot, it's not physically harmful or anything! Besides, I am sure that I could go to the supermarket and find some products that aren't so bad...

Summer's Eve, get me some ice for my water! (Not that I use this product, a commercial just came on TV for it!)
Frito Lay! Don't bounce your ball in the house! LOL

After I go grocery shopping I will try to find more!

Good topic! LOL

LMAO!!!

Summer's Eve is a good one! Her name could be Summer's Eve Smith, and you just call her Summer!! Or Eve! LOL That was a good one!!! LMAO!

CrimsonTide4 · #5 08-16-2001, 04:30 PM

LMAO @ you and Libra Soul.

Picture this, since I am a teacher, I have FIRST HAND knowledge of this:

It's the first day of school, Ms. Simmons is taking attendance:

1. Smuckers Sanders
2. Jif Jefferson
3. Ore Ida Owens
4. Chips a Hoy Carson
5. Viagra Vincent
6. Monistat Mitchell
7. Pine Sol Perkins
8. Parkay and Pam Peterson (they the twins)
9. Hallmark Hall
10. Dannon Davis

NOOOOOOOW do you see how hard it would be for me as a teacher not to LMAO @ your child's name and they would get clowned ROYALLY.

Think back to the Wood, Slim's real name was Lavinio

-- he got clowned by HIS BOYS on that one.

toocute · #6 08-16-2001, 04:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CrimsonTide4:
6. Monistat Mitchell

#1 Leading Lady · #7 08-16-2001, 05:34 PM

Ok here are a few

1. Trojan Lubricated Johnson
2. Crisco Nicole Williams
3. Tampax Marie Smith

Serenity · #8 08-16-2001, 06:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by #1 Leading Lady:
1. Trojan Lubricated Johnson

LMAO! Now, why'd the last name have to be Johnson?

------------------
Sigma Lambda Upsilon: Sincerity, Loyalty, Unity http://www.sigmalambdaupsilon.org

Steeltrap · #9 08-16-2001, 06:21 PM

Monistat Mitchell?
Tampax Marie Smith?

ROFLMPNGAO again! When I saw those, I almost choked on my late lunch -- this topic is straight comedy.

prayerfull · #10 08-16-2001, 06:40 PM

Trix Smith
Alize Jenkins (oops...that's really been used)
Moet Chandon Jones (probably been used too)
Hersheys Jackson

Scary, but I wouldn't be surprised if there are some little children out there stuck with these names.

[This message has been edited by prayerfull (edited August 16, 2001).]

OneOneTwo · #11 08-16-2001, 06:59 PM

I think that that would indicate a "troubled" home for the child. Yep, I see red flags EVERYWHERE. Nethertheless, here are my contributions.

FUBU Malone
Durex Peterson
SkinSoSoft Butler
Compaq Carter
Generic Spencer
Duracell Baker

112

ClassyLady · #12 08-16-2001, 07:52 PM

I don't know if anybody watches Arli$$ on HBO (it comes on after Sex and the City) but this is where the topic comes from. Arliss is a sports agent and he was going to donate sperm to one of his lesbian athletes as long as he could name the baby. He was going to name it Marlboro or Parliament for millions of dollars from a tobacco company.

I would do it, but I would definitely have to change the pronunciation and the spelling (can I change the spelling

) or a name-brand that isn't too specific. It would be something like:

1. Vaseline Smith (pronounced Va-SAH-li-nay)
2. Nike Morris (Ni-KAY)
3. Coca Cola Lee (Cola is her middle name)
4. Visine Anderson (Viz-a-NAY)
5. Jergens Payne (HAIR-jens, spanish pronunciation)
6. Hewlett Packard Long
7. Oscar Mayer Starks
8. Ralph Lauren Jenkins
9. Donna Karan Watkins

P. S.: I actually know someone named Jordache.

Ideal08 · #13 08-16-2001, 08:42 PM

ROTFLMP&GAO!!!

Y'all are hilarious!!! HILARIOUS!! I'm CTFU over here!! LMAO!!!

My favorites so far (Not counting ClassyLady's, hers deserve an award for the alternate pronunciations, lmao)

Dannon. That's not too bad.
Parkay and Pam, not too bad, either.
Ore Ida and Jif aren't that bad, either, lol

This is really hilarious, lmao!

FUBU Malone, this is the best, for real, LMAO!

Ok, lol, yall need to quit.

BTW, the spanish pronunciation of Jergens would be Hair-hens. Which you can't do in Spanish, because all of the plurals are 'es'. Jergenes would work, Hair-hen-ace. Sorry, I couldn't resist, lol

That's it, I'm going to start watchin' Arli$$. This is just too funny to me. I can't even come up with any, lol. Please, keep them coming, lol.

Trojan Johnson, ROTFLMAO.

CrimsonTide4 · #14 08-16-2001, 09:46 PM

ROFLMAO @ some of y'alls names!!

MONISTAT and MICHELOB MITCHELL (more twins)
Lifesavers and Lipton Little

Fruit Loops and Fruity Pebbles Ferguson

AKA2D '91 · #15 08-16-2001, 10:07 PM

oh me, oh my!

LMAO!