the bad boy....

AlethiaSi · #1 03-29-2004, 09:13 AM

i was seeing this guy before i came to london for about a year- he was a perfect match physically for me- everything that i want- but he wasn't too bright. he was in the bad boy frat- and he also had a girlfriend that i knew through a friend and she went to another school... he and i were seeing each other before they started dating- and after i found out about her (and she found out about me)- i refused to go on with it- after a big fight- we stopped tlasking and i was so upset- i started to get over it- and then he called me- we started seeing each other again... like he was at my house constantly- and i know she found out abou tit- but she stayed with him anyway.... (i didn't like her anyway

) but he never would stay at my house- we didn't hang out during the day really- and i was always around when it was convenient- my friends didn't like him but the sex was incredible- and i thought i could just be casual and not care.... damn was i wrong- one night he's like- i love you so much- i was like what?! after that he started hanging around more... i put off telling him i was going ot london.... because i didnt' know how to tell him... then right before i came here- we got into a huge fight b/c he was freaking out that i was leaving.... and we hadn't spoken since- i think about him allll the time here- no guys are appealing to me- and i'm always dreaming about him.... i'm embarrassed that i can't get over him- he stands against everything that i stand for in a guy... but i just can't stop....

i found out through one of my ssiters that he broke up with his girlfriend... so what do i do...?
...i called him.... i'm so dumb! i am embarrassed now b/c i gave in... the conversation was fine- i think he was a little freaked that i was calling him- we talked for like 20 minutes... but i have no resolution... he's still there- and i'm here.... i need to stop thinking about him... and i don't have anyone else to focus on- i've gone on dates here- but they don't measure up at all.... waht should i do?

James · #2 03-29-2004, 12:35 PM

Lets see. You want to reopen a relationship with someone that is 4 thousand miles away from you. Someone you never had a real relationship with because you were just the other chick.

And trust me you were just the other chick regardless of whatever pillow talk he gave you.

Also someone that you dated while he had a GF but . . well . . you lost the competition because you got more attached and he did not leave his GF for you. That means she won. And he won . . and well, you lost.

Although I am sure that he will say something like it was thoughts of you that ended his relationship with her because he realized how great you were etc etc . . I could write the dialogue for him . . all men could.

By the way, the sex was probably better because it was illicit. Kind of like boffing someone in the school library. It adds to the excitement. Cheating sex can be more intense.

Anyway . . . with all that going for you two, you should definitely get back together with him.

I mean your past experience with him just cries out: Great potential relationship . . .

And of course . . . drum roll please . . . he might have changed or will change for you in the last few months.

I swear, all of you girls need to go out and get some new boytoys instead of recycling all your old defective ones. You gals have no problems buying new clothes right? Same principle.

decadence · #3 03-29-2004, 12:48 PM

I'll compose a longer reply later; but for now... harsh as it might seem

there's a lot of truth in James' post.

Lady Pi Phi · #4 03-29-2004, 01:03 PM

Question?

Why is she the other girl? They started dating before he and his "girlfriend" got together. Wouldn't the other girl be "the other chick"?

James · #5 03-29-2004, 01:06 PM

No. The context implies that the other girl was more a GirlFriend . . ..

They started dating . . he started seeing someone else. She endd it. He stayed with the other girl. She started seeing him again.

Quote:

Originally posted by Lady Pi Phi
Question?

Why is she the other girl? They started dating before he and his "girlfriend" got together. Wouldn't the other girl be "the other chick"?

AlethiaSi · #6 03-29-2004, 01:41 PM

lol thanks for sticking up for me

its true though

its funny that you say that- since i was always around him and at his fraternity house- his brothers treated me like i was the girlfriend and she was the other woman- she was ever hardly around!

i know its stupid for me to hang on to him... or rather his memory.... i was hesitant about posting this just because i didn't know what others would think of me about it.... but i guess talking about it is one of the only ways to get over it...

James · #7 03-29-2004, 02:04 PM

ITs not precisely stupid . . you are just one of those awesome girls that guys can be rather inattentive to . . in fact, one of those girls that guys can treat badly and they will stay eager for more. Girls that undervalue themselves.

I think its kind of endearing myself. A useful trait form a guy's point of view.

Quote:

Originally posted by AlethiaSi
lol thanks for sticking up for me its true though

its funny that you say that- since i was always around him and at his fraternity house- his brothers treated me like i was the girlfriend and she was the other woman- she was ever hardly around!

i know its stupid for me to hang on to him... or rather his memory.... i was hesitant about posting this just because i didn't know what others would think of me about it.... but i guess talking about it is one of the only ways to get over it...

decadence · #8 03-29-2004, 02:08 PM

In the words of Lt. Col. Frank Slade "hoo-ah!".
James you're terrible! lol

-- decadence
who likes James' posts

AOII_LB93 · #9 03-29-2004, 03:29 PM

As harsh as it seems....I will say the mean boy thing: Get over him! You are in London...don't dwell on some guy who is 4,000 miles away. Study abroads are for growing.

I tried to break it off with my ex before I went to France, but he said he wanted to try a LDR. I said that those only work if both want them too, but he didn't get the point. I had to break up with him over the phone, it sucked, but I'm MUCH better of for it now.

You're supposed to be having the time of your life over there, not comparing every guy to him. Everyone out there has their positive and negative qualities. Yes, it's easy to compare, but would you want every guy you date to compare you to their ex and then not give you a second chance? It gets old after a while. I'm not trying to be mean, just giving the "older" mom type advice, and I'm not old.

Diamond Delta · #10 03-29-2004, 10:03 PM

have the soundtrack.

Chalk it up to a wonderful affair
be thankful you had the opportunity to have so much fun
ramanticise (spell) it to all you meet (in London)
when you get home-get over him, get on.

When you are 80 you'll think about it with only the sweetness and none of the bitter. You will never be this young and this beautiful again. Enjoy.

AchtungBaby80 · #11 03-29-2004, 10:52 PM

He sounds like he's more trouble than he's worth. Besides, if it's good, er, fun you want, I'm sure there are loads of English guys who are just as talented.

AlphaGamDiva · #12 03-30-2004, 02:49 AM

i will say one thing and one thing only:

find a good British man and ride him like an American cowboy.

decadence · #13 03-30-2004, 03:16 AM

Posts like this are why we all love Monica.

AlethiaSi · #14 03-30-2004, 06:54 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AlphaGamDiva
i will say one thing and one thing only:

find a good British man and ride him like an American cowboy.

ahahahahahahaha now thats my kind of advice! lol

lol your crack me up!