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03-04-2004, 04:23 AM
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Join Date: May 2002
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Terrible greek article from SUNY new paltz
http://oracle.newpaltz.edu/article.cfm?a_id=1195
Quote:
You Can't Always Get What You Want
Column By Jillian Nolan, Arts and Entertainment Editor
A Different Kind of Sisterhood
It’s that time of year again: sororities have begun searching for the few they feel deserve the honor of becoming a sister or for those who are willing to have flour and mustard dumped on them or swallow a goldfish to feel included.
As we walk around campus, the Greek-lettered shirts stare back at us making us wonder, “Why haven’t I joined a sorority? I want sisters.” But is sisterhood really what girls are signing up for?
Growing up with two brothers, I never thought I would feel the bond only two sisters can share. I came to college unaware of what was ahead of me. Did I need to join a sorority to fit in? Would more people want to be my friend if I was part of a Greek organization?
It didn’t take me long to realize that I was able to make friends without humiliating myself by chanting outside of Humanities. I was close with my old roommate Evelyn, and found I had a lot in common with Jen, my current roommate. I had many other friends, none of which I had to do push-ups to prove my loyalty to.
This year through working at The Oracle, I became close with Sam, the Editor-in-Chief, as well as other members of the editorial board. I realized that these girls were more than friends. These were the sisters that I’d found on my own. I know our friendships are based on something more than Greek letters.
It seems unlikely to me that someone who treated you like the dirt on the bottom of their shoe while you were pledging, making you embarrass and humiliate yourself, could really be a genuinely nice person in the end. Why is it that they can’t become sisters in the way that most people become friends: by finding a common interest.
While studying in the library last year I saw girls working hard until a sister clapped her hands. All the pledges scurried to fall in line as other students watched with smirks. Anxiously one girl said, “I’m so nervous! I wonder what they’re going to make us do tonight.”
I will admit, it’s a positive idea to make the girls study for a certain amount of time, but then to force them to stay up till all hours of the night making fools of themselves? Surely the whole concept of good study skills is being negated.
Two of my friends have had needless confrontations about petty drama started by sorority girls trying to protect their “sisters’” honor. What’s the point of that? Go back to high school. It sometimes seems hard to believe that they all know each other well enough to call themselves “sisters.” They may say that they are sisters because they’d always be there for the other members of the sorority, but why can’t they be there for girls who don’t pay dues?
If you are weak enough that you feel you need to belong to a Greek organization to have an identity, clearly you need to work on self-esteem and self-image. Insecurity and desperation are a poor basis for friendship.
There are clearly exceptions to everything mentioned above. There are nice, hardworking and friendly girls in sororities, but they appear to be few and far between. There are positive aspects to being in a sorority, community service being one of them. But perhaps a re-examination of why girls really join a sorority is in order. More often than not, girls are joining for the parties and the “security” that comes with letters they flaunt every day. You don’t really hear many girls saying, “Gee I’m gonna join a sorority because I want to help this town out.” If girls really want community service, there are other organizations on campus such as NYPIRG and Circle K that do community service. Unlike sororities, NYPIRG won’t ask you to pay them to get to do service, nor do they do hazing to get you to join.
We are here for four years to learn, not to prance around in letters pretending it makes you something better than you were before. And we are surrounded by people who are willing to be our friends without us whipping out our checkbooks to pay dues. It would appear that joining a sorority teaches you one thing: money and humiliation can buy you friends. But what happens when you get out into the real world? Will these sisters have the ability to make friends in a conventional way?
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Everyone should email her and tell her how terribly wrong she is.. Jillian_is@mostlysunny.com
I know I did
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KAPPA
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03-04-2004, 04:25 AM
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: Massachusetts
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my reply:
Ms. Nolan,
Your article is grossly mislead. I'm sure you've received many emails stating this since your recent publication, but I felt it necessary to reiterate this point. I am not a student of SUNY New Paltz, however I am a member of a national sorority that is present on your campus.
In your article you stated "I had many other friends, none of which I had to do push-ups to prove my loyalty to". Well, you've started the article off pretty poorly here. Never have I had to do push ups to "prove my loyalty", in fact I have never even seen one of my sisters do a jumping jack, never mind a push up.
You also stated "I Know our friendships are based on something more than Greek letters". Well, here is something we have in common! My sisterhood has very little to do with the letters we wear, but so much to do with the IDEALS we share. This leads me to the next quote you offensively inserted: "why is it that they can’t become sisters in the way that most people become friends: by finding a common interest". Now, here you are just ignorant. WE DO HAVE COMMON INTERESTS! Do you honestly think that females could be together in a friendly manner for HOURS a week and not fight if we had nothing in common? if you do, that is a dream world.
"We are here for four years to learn, not to prance around in letters pretending it makes you something better than you were before", and "But what happens when you get out into the real world"? you stated in your last paragraph. Well, let me provide you with a few statistics. 85% of Fortune 500 executives belong to fraternities or sororities; all but two U.S. Presidents belong to fraternities (since 1825, when fraternities were established); 85% of all Supreme Court Justices belong to fraternities and sororities, INCLUDING Sandra Day O'Connor- the first female Supreme Court Justice; Nationally, 59% of Greeks graduate from college, while only 49% of non Greeks graduate. Do these factual statistics clear up any doubt in your mind??
Please, answer me this? When was the last time you and your circle of friends was out in the community helping others? Have you adopted an underprivileged child from another country? Have you collected can tabs for dialysis machines? Have you even lifted a finger to clean up campus or the surrounding areas? How dare you judge us, after all the positive we do for the very community you undoubtedly take for granted.
Any finally, in regard to your comment "It would appear that joining a sorority teaches you one thing: money and humiliation can buy you friends", I challenge you to find a campus organization that does not require any form of dues. If it is sponsored by a Student Activities commission, you paid dues with your tuition and fees. If is does not, more likely than not there is a dues requirement. This SMALL monetary amount is simply protection during philanthropies, meetings, or other sorority sponsored events. If you still want to view this as 'paying for friends', then God damn it, I didn't pay nearly enough.
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KAPPA
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03-04-2004, 10:19 AM
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Cheers to KappaTarzan, you worded that perfectly! Sadly, a women that feels that strongly about sororities that she wrote an article for a paper will probably blow off such a strong and eloquent e-mail, but if she's smart, she'll read it with a grain of salt, and realize what all of us believe.
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03-04-2004, 03:50 PM
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thank you
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KAPPA
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03-04-2004, 08:44 PM
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That column was positively hilarious! My only critique would be to do some research. That was a bit too much of a free-writing exercise that turned into a published story.
I'd love for the writer to challenge herself by trying the other angle. Wouldn't her account of being a PNM in sorority recruitment be hysterical? She has a fun and very witty writing style, and she's entitled to her opinion. Besides... think of all the letters to the editor they're going to publish from the Greeks on campus that will promote all that is good about Greek Life
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03-05-2004, 12:08 AM
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KappaTarzan,
That was an awesome response to that article. I hope it gives Ms. Nolan something to chew on! Kudos on showing her what we are really all about.
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