Good Credit/Bad Credit: Does It Matter?

[delph998]

Hello All!

I have a simple question for y'all. Would you NOT date a person if they have bad credit? We're talking settling down or marriage here...would you or wouldn't you?

Holla back! Tony, can't wait to hear your response when you get back!

Note: I'll answer my own question later.

[SummerChild]

Originally posted by delph998
Hello All!

I have a simple question for y'all. Would you NOT date a person if they have bad credit? We're talking settling down or marriage here...would you or wouldn't you?

Holla back! Tony, can't wait to hear your response when you get back!

Note: I'll answer my own question later.

Delph, I've never gotten far enough to need to know a man's credit history but it would definitely be a consideration if I am contemplating marriage. If he has reformed his ways and is now managing his money better and paying his bills then this says that he is dependable and responsible to me - so it would definitely be a consideration in whether I want to marry him. If his credit is bad, I'd try to help him clean it up before we tie the knot b/c I would not want that to be a gloomy cloud over our ability to purchase together, etc. once we are married.

SC

[9dstpm]

If I had known my first husband's credit record, I would have turned in the otha (notice I didn't say other) direction!! It's one thing to mess your credit up and then learn from it and become responsible with money, but he was just plain BAD!!! His credit was so jacked up that we got turned down for every apartment we applied for and had to end up living with his mother!! Then he couldn't get a job at any of the casinos in Detroit when they opened up a few years back because of his credit. His parents co-signed for him to get a car and it ends up getting taken by the repo man!! The only job that he could get was at this place called Tuesday Morning and that was only part-time!! It took a looooooooong time for me to get my credit cleaned up after I divorced him!!!

I'm not saying that my credit is A-1 either but I learned my lesson from the plastic hangover in college and have become responsible with money. My current Hubby suffered from the Grown Ass Man syndrome and he's in recovery, I'm hoping that we can be able to purchase a home in the next 5 years or so.

So having said that, I agree with SummerChild and I wouldn't turn a man down based on his credit if I see that he has become responsible with his money since messing up his credit.

[Strive]

Credit Matters if you are considering Marriage. But other than that hey who cares how much debt I'm in.

[Love_Spell_6]

A while back I didn't think credit should matter....but after thinking about it and talking to my older married friends...I would have to say its a deal breaker....but not for shallow reasons...

Not because a man has to have this or that financially.....but Many marriages run into marital problems stemming from financial difficulty....I have A-1 credit...no debt....pay my bills on time.....and If I was thinking marriage with a guy that had terrible credit...I'd just be asking for problems... Marriage isn't just about love.....you have to consider things like debt beforehand...

[1browngirl]

Originally posted by delph998
Hello All!

I have a simple question for y'all. Would you NOT date a person if they have bad credit? We're talking settling down or marriage here...would you or wouldn't you?

If we are considering marriage, I'd have to also consider his credit worthiness as well. That's a big thing because when two people get married they take on the debt and responsibilities of each other, so in essence his debt/bad credit becomes mine. I pay my bills on time and work hard to stay debt free, so I want someone who has the same financial goals as me, if he didn't well we'd have to work on that before getting married.

[Honeykiss1974]

If his credit score is low due to past mistakes (such as abuse of credit cards in college, etc. ) or medical bills and he is now working on getting this paid off or resolved, then no, his credit would not be a deterent for marriage.Considering that items stay on your credit report for 7 years, I don't think its fair for me to I hold something against him that happened 5 or 6 years ago, especially if he is now paying them off (or getting them resolved).

If he is currently STILL fiscally unstable (spending cash all "will, nilly" like and not saving anything), then "Houston, we have a problem".

[delph998]

This is a personal question for me because I don't have the best credit. But it's from things that I did back, back in the day. Yes, I'm taking care of them, but I wonder if a guy would NOT date me because of that.

My sister made mistakes too while she was in college and she says that nobody will want to marry her because of her credit. I wanted to know if it's true or not.

[Honeykiss1974]

Originally posted by delph998
This is a personal question for me because I don't have the best credit. But it's from things that I did back, back in the day. Yes, I'm taking care of them, but I wonder if a guy would NOT date me because of that.

My sister made mistakes too while she was in college and she says that nobody will want to marry her because of her credit. I wanted to know if it's true or not.

Tell your sis I wouldn't worry about it. If she is making inroads today is by trying to get things paid off or resolved (has a budget, saving money, etc.), then it probably won't be a SERIOUS issue.

Given the fact that today, our society is experiencing record numbers of bankruptcies and unemployment (which means things are either not getting paid or are being paid late), she is not the only person with credit woes.

[Rain Man]

My ex-wife had shaky credit, like I did at the time (for more info, visit the Credit Card Debt thread in the AKA forum I TTTed a while ago).

While we didn't apply for credit anywhere (except for the purchase of the rings), we got harassed by collectors every day and it got old for the Mrs. to keep telling me not to answer the phone. Anyway...

A few years ago I met a sorority woman I was considering marrying. We got to the discussion on credit. Her response on her status was nothing but red flags galore. She maxed out or was late on all her cards (including a Victoria Secret card--dang, how many pairs of drawers do you need to max out a VS card). Anyway, we never hooked up matrimonially (of course), but the thought of her coming into a marital union with all that unsecured debt made me very nervous, particularly in light of the fact that I just got out of a similar predicament several years prior.

Best course of action: A serious discussion AND SUCCESSFUL EXECUTION of a way to pay down/off that credit card debt LONG before the vows are sworn is one of the many keys to marital bliss.

[delph998]

Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
Tell your sis I wouldn't worry about it. If she is making inroads today is by trying to get things paid off or resolved (has a budget, saving money, etc.), then it probably won't be a SERIOUS issue.

Given the fact that today, our society is experiencing record numbers of bankruptcies and unemployment (which means things are either not getting paid or are being paid late), she is not the only person with credit woes.

I tell her that all of the time! She has no debt any more, but that stuff from the past is haunting her.

[delph998]

Originally posted by Rain Man
My ex-wife had shaky credit, like I did at the time (for more info, visit the Credit Card Debt thread in the AKA forum I TTTed a while ago).

While we didn't apply for credit anywhere (except for the purchase of the rings), we got harassed by collectors every day and it got old for the Mrs. to keep telling me not to answer the phone. Anyway...

A few years ago I met a sorority woman I was considering marrying. We got to the discussion on credit. Her response on her status was nothing but red flags galore. She maxed out or was late on all her cards (including a Victoria Secret card--dang, how many pairs of drawers do you need to max out a VS card). Anyway, we never hooked up matrimonially (of course), but the thought of her coming into a marital union with all that unsecured debt made me very nervous, particularly in light of the fact that I just got out of a similar predicament several years prior.

Best course of action: A serious discussion AND SUCCESSFUL EXECUTION of a way to pay down/off that credit card debt LONG before the vows are sworn is one of the many keys to marital bliss.

You crack me up Rainman, but your opinion is valued! Thanks!

[stardusttwin]

Originally posted by delph998
I tell her that all of the time! She has no debt any more, but that stuff from the past is haunting her.

If she no longer has any bad debt (outside of school loans/mortgage or car note) and has maintained regular on time payments her credit should not be bad. If she is being denied for credit she should get a copy of her report and go through it thoroughly and make sure it is correct and immeadiately request any incorrect items be removed.

Another item she should check on- if your sis has a bunch of credit cards that she isn't using (and has paid off) she needs to officially "close" a couple of accounts. Your score/debt ratio isn't only graded on just what you owe its on what debt you could possibly get into. So although all of her cards are paid off-if she is carrying a possible credit debt of say $20,000 (4 cards w/$5,000 limit) and she makes $40,000 a year she continue to be viewed as a risk because although the cards are clear now, if she decides to go on a shopping spree tomorrow she will be in debt for 50% of her income (not including her day to day expenses).

I got myself in trouble in the past, and once I got my act cleaned up had to carefully go through my report and remove items that were errantly placed on there. (Thats when I learned to remove past store cards that had long been paid off and not even used anymore). I was doing great maintaining my record until I lost my job...however my "recent years" of good credit is the only reason why they are cutting me any slack now [except for Dell, but I'll save that rant for another thread...good for nothing peice of crap]

And rainman...Victoria's Secret sells a lot more than drawers...but those twice a year clearance sales CAN rack up if one isn't careful .

[TonyB06]

As far as simply dating, it wouldn't stop me if I liked her. Personal credit isn't really an "early-in-the-relationship" discussion topic for me. If things get serious and the credit is raggedy, you're probably going to have an inkling anyway, because it's probably going to worry her anyway, and you'll sense that. If it's jacked, then we have to talk. First, to see what her mind-set is about it (some, believe it or not are cool being heavily in debt.) If they're going to be "stiff-necked" (old grand-folks term of the day) about it, it's less likely you can do anything but be dragged down by them if you were to marry.

Finances, are a 2nd tier issue for me, but you gotta address it, because how could it not affect things? Over the long run, it's kinda hard to get your "swerve on" when you know Kaufmanns, Sears, American Express, et. al., are sitting on your dining room table waiting to kick your (rear) yet another month.

as was once said about our people's tendency toward over-consumption: just because it's on your azz doesn't make it an "asset."

[ClassyLady]

Unless we were considering marriage, bad credit would not matter at all to me.

In the case of marriage, the reason for the low credit rating would be more important than the bad credit itself. If my man was just plain irresponsible with his finances, I would have to consider if he would be that way with his family. If he had been put in a tough situation (such as illness or death) where he chose to sacrifice his credit for the good of a loved one or if he just didn't know any better at the time, I can work through it. As long as he is responsible and has learned from his past mistakes, we can make it happen.