Greek reputation

BabyP · #1 02-03-2004, 07:46 AM

I hear that some greeks date another especially their "bro" frat but I heard you have to be careful cuz its easy to have a bad rep. I tried to warn a friend of mine who just became a sister (not wtih us) and she is 18 and flirting with most of the guy frats and I am afraid she will have a wild girl/slut reputation. Does that really happen???

kddani · #2 02-03-2004, 08:41 AM

If she sleeps with several of them, yeah, she'd get a rep. Any girl would.

If she's just flirting and not doing anything, that's not very harmful.

It has little to do with being greek... any girl who throws herself at a number of guys would get a rep.

KnightDU02 · #3 02-03-2004, 10:39 AM

And as the previous post said, thats not only with greeks its with any girl that hooks up with a good number of a certain class of people whether its fraternity guys of ball players. The "groupie" label for use of better word is easy to be attached and hard to be removed especially with a girl that young. There's nothing wrong with having some fun, I had mine, and even though I'm a guy I understand girls have to get theirs as well, and it doesnt make them instant trash or whatever. However you always have to watch what circles you are runnin in.

AchtungBaby80 · #4 02-03-2004, 10:50 AM

Another thing to consider...even if you don't don't anything "ho-ey," like sleep with a bunch of guys from the same fraternity, people talk. If there's any reason for someone to even think that you might have done something a little unladylike, they will say that you most definitely did do it. It's soooo easy to get a bad reputation. I've seen it happen. The brothers tell each other, and then they tell their girlfriends, and their girlfriends tell their friends...

Zetagymnast · #5 02-03-2004, 12:38 PM

In my sorority we make it a point not to mess with any brothers. If there is a serious relationship then it is ok. It has happen before that people are not mature enough to handle non-serious relationship involving the brother and sister relationship. I for one have had that experience. I will only get involved with a brother if I know a relationship will develop.

astroAPhi · #6 02-03-2004, 05:15 PM

If she's being a really obnoxious flirt, she better watch out. My freshman roommate was called "Cock Tease" by XYZ because she always flirted but was really just a tease.

SiKeS · #7 02-03-2004, 06:05 PM

Yes, you do need to be careful of how flirty you are, how often you flirt and with who...

As Knight said, it isn't just greeks, but also does occur with greeks since they are a group of people that talk and see each other on a regular basis. Word travels fast.

For an example, I was invited to a XYZ pledge party (first time I had ever met the guys) and had introduced myself to a cute southern girl. Instantly, some of the brothers came up to me and told me to be careful, that she has a "slut rep" and has slept with about every guy in the house... I would have later figured this out for myself, when I saw her moving from room to room when we got back the the house... Flaunting the fact that she had just gotten with blah and blah and blah...

Point in the story is that yes, people do talk (often with good reason)... Watch what you do, have a good time without overdoing it and I think you'd be fine.

Katey Alpha Gam · #8 02-04-2004, 12:42 AM

I think an important thing to note, esp. at schools w/small greek systems is that everyone knows somebody who knows somebody. We all do enough together and hang around enough of the same people that you may think that the word isnt getting out, but it always does. It would be like if you were from a small town, word gets out. Also, and I am NOT saying this is a regular thing at all, but I know for a fact some chapters of fraternities have talked about who they have slept w/at meeting or have even had files on girls about who they had slept w/in the chapter and what they were like. Now think about all those people who may tell someone else, then who they would tell, etc.....

I'm not saying to not have fun, but you just have to be careful and realize that the word might get out. Thats the EXACT reason why we dont wear our letters when we go out on the town!!

HotDamnImAPhiMu · #9 02-04-2004, 01:57 AM

Eh, I don't know. Especially now that I'm a teensy bit older (22, I took a year and a half off) I'm figuring out more and more how to flirt "harmlessly."

Unless you're talking dirty to the guys or sleeping around, you won't get a reputation for anything other than a friendly, sweet girl. Of course, maybe that's just the South -- most of our girls know how to be sweet, friendly, and attractive to guys without sleeping with them. Not too hard actually now that I think about it, most *girls* in general know how!

Anyway, unless she's ACTING on her flirting, she should be fine.

Glitter650 · #10 02-04-2004, 02:13 AM

I second the statement about the small greek system... if it is a small system remember EVERYONE KNOWS EVERYTHING !!!!!!!! NEVER EVER assume "no one will ever find out". THEY always do find out... and most of the time people found out some story that's just a version of the truth... not what actually happened... I mean really you could just be talking with someone and next day on the quad/in the union... just hanging out you hear that you appearantly hooked up with him... (happened to one of my sisters) Just tell her to always try and keep your head on your shoulders...

TSteven · #11 02-04-2004, 02:38 AM

In your opinion, is your friend being respected for her actions? Is your friend acting like a "lady" when she does this? Do you feel comfortable with her actions? If not, then I agree that she *may* end up with a bad reputation.

With all due respect, and while I don't know the situation, depending on what type or reputation SHE wants, your friend might want to be careful with her so called flirting.

What one person - male or female - perceives as flirting, an other might perceive as being a a tease or worse, a slut. We can't pretend to know what others are thinking, and what they are saying to others. And yes, being a tease can have negative ramifications for not only her, but her GLO. Both reputations can - and usually - "get around".

Please remember the "sorority cliche". ABC girls are the ones you party with; DEF are the ones you sleep with; but the XYZ *ladies* are the ones you take home to Mother. You may put the "tease girls" in where you want, but frankly, most girls who are a tease are not taken home to Mother.

Again, the bottom line is this. Is your friend being respected for her actions? Is her actions being seen in a "good light"? If so, then she should "go for it" so to speak but also, be aware of the possible consequences.

BabyP · #12 02-04-2004, 06:22 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by TSteven
In your opinion, is your friend being respected for her actions? Is your friend acting like a "lady" when she does this? Do you feel comfortable with her actions? If not, then I agree that she *may* end up with a bad reputation.

With all due respect, and while I don't know the situation, depending on what type or reputation SHE wants, your friend might want to be careful with her so called flirting.

What one person - male or female - perceives as flirting, an other might perceive as being a a tease or worse, a slut. We can't pretend to know what others are thinking, and what they are saying to others. And yes, being a tease can have negative ramifications for not only her, but her GLO. Both reputations can - and usually - "get around".

Please remember the "sorority cliche". ABC girls are the ones you party with; DEF are the ones you sleep with; but the XYZ *ladies* are the ones you take home to Mother. You may put the "tease girls" in where you want, but frankly, most girls who are a tease are not taken home to Mother.

Again, the bottom line is this. Is your friend being respected for her actions? Is her actions being seen in a "good light"? If so, then she should "go for it" so to speak but also, be aware of the possible consequences.

well I have seen her drinking and I swear she was all over this guy and they were dating that is what I assumed then later on, I met the other guy IN THE SAME FRAT and he was getting her a christmas present. I was thinking....uh i thought she was with the other guy but i didnt say anything of course.......but maybe they both know and just using her you never know.......