Abstainance as safe sex

Rain Man · #1 02-08-2001, 12:01 PM

Hello to all GreekChatters

I have another loaded question for all of you.

How many of you all believe that abstainance is a good means of safe sex? Do you practice it? Do you plan to teach your children about abstainance? Why isn't abstainance more emphasized in schools sex ed programs? Why in our society is virginity seen as a defect rather then an anoiting?

Lemme hear from you: How do you feel about abstainance?

RM

sphinxpoet · #2 02-08-2001, 12:14 PM

Fair question,
Abstainance is the most effective way of not catching an STD or having an unwanted pregency. I do not think abstainance is unpopular nowadays. There are more commercials and things of that nature dealing with it. At least here around the Pyramids (aka NYC)there has been a big push. I think the issue of teaching it in school has been a big issue. Any sexual issue seems to bring Drama.

Sphinxpoet
"If God has created a better man than an Alpha man, I do not know where he is." Mona Humpries Bailey, Past National President of Delta Sigma Theta (in her remarks at the Atlanta Convention in 1986). She is sister of Alpha brother Frederick Humphries, President of Florida A & M University.

SlvrnGold · #3 02-08-2001, 04:56 PM

Personally, I am a big advocate of abstinence. After working in an AIDS resource center and seeing what AIDS does to an individual, abstinence is what I preach on a daily basis. I think sex is becoming too casual in today's society. And while condoms help, they aren't a cure-all against STDs or pregnancy. HIV is growing faster in the African American community than any other community in the nation, that's a scary thought. We've been preaching safer sex through condoms for years now, and statistically, it hasn't been effective. I would like to see us collectively promote abstinence as the full proof way to prevent STDs and pregnancy.
Yes, I am celibate. Abstinence is the number one effective way to prevent any type of STD and pregnancy. I definitely plan to teach my kids to wait to have sex until marriage. However, I feel that teaching abstinence in school is infringing on parents' rights to educate their child about sex. Not all parents feel that their children should wait until marriage or wait period. It's like teaching religion in school...I feel like it's up to the parents to dictate what their child should and should not be exposed to.

Rain Man · #4 02-08-2001, 05:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SlvrnGold:
Personally, I am a big advocate of abstinence. After working in an AIDS resource center and seeing what AIDS does to an individual, abstinence is what I preach on a daily basis. I think sex is becoming too casual in today's society. And while condoms help, they aren't a cure-all against STDs or pregnancy. HIV is growing faster in the African American community than any other community in the nation, that's a scary thought. We've been preaching safer sex through condoms for years now, and statistically, it hasn't been effective. I would like to see us collectively promote abstinence as the full proof way to prevent STDs and pregnancy.

Very good points, SlvrnGold.

One thing I notice seems to go largely ignored, in terms of what condoms do NOT prevent, and that is SOUL TIES, which is the exchange of souls, which subsequently leads to an "attachment" to that person, if you will.

More on this later.

RM

MIDWESTDIVA · #5 02-08-2001, 05:54 PM

I have been practicing abstinence. And sometimes IT GETS ROUGH! But nothing worthwhile is easy. And yes, I'm going to train up my future children the way they should go. That means I while be stressing abstinence. I realize I can't keep my children under surveillance to make sure they're keeping their pants up and their dresses down, but it is still my responsibility to teach them right from wrong, not the schools.

AlphaChiGirl · #6 02-09-2001, 03:01 AM

Abstinence...I've asked some of my friends what they considered it as being. Some said, "anything but intercourse" to "we only kiss". I never thought it was such a gray area.

I do believe teaching abstinence, espech in this day and age, is a good idea. I know a lot of my friends from HS signed those "True Love Waits" pledges, but I'm not sure if they all kept those promises. I went to a fairly conservative high school, so I didn't feel the pressure to have sex, like so many other people feel the peer pressure. So, in my case, virginity wasn't seen as a liability. I think abstinence isn't taught in sex ed curriculae because it's assumed that it will be futile...that unless the student has some religious/moral convictions regarding sex outside marriage or a serious committed relationship, that they're not going to wait. Which is BS.

But now, being in college, I see where abstinence is a very good idea. I know a lot of girls who will "hook up" (anything ranging from a makeout session to intercourse) with guys they don't know! Of course, they have a little guilt, but it's really sad, especially when they haven't had a real boyfriend ever, or they have these emotional connections to these guys who barely know their names. I definitely plan on teaching my children abstinence, not only for health reasons, but for the protection of the emotional bond.

So, yeah...abstinence is good.

Shalom2U · #7 02-11-2001, 12:34 AM

~Shalom RainMan (Shalom Everyone):

AAAAAhhhh RainMain---Soul Ties---I'm feelin' a good lesson up in here!

~Shalom

AlphaChiGirl · #8 02-11-2001, 03:09 AM

Okay, I just read (I was in a restaurant w/ friends earlier tonight and picked up) the Providence Phoenix. The front cover was this article about the federal sex ed classes teaching abstinence and abstinence only. The catch is that "abstinence" means many a thing. So, according to this article, kids are having anal and oral sexual activity because it's not "intercourse"...this is just as dangerous. Maybe we aren't teaching what we should...which is personal responsibility (my mantra, yes) and not "don't do it". 'Cause people are going to anyway. Yes, I am a cynic.

1 Woman of Virtue · #9 02-12-2001, 02:38 PM

In my gospel choir in undergrad we had a lot of what I would call...(ahem) Pentacostal Pimps, or uh...Heavenly Hoochies. Crass, I know,but those terms were used to describe people who would brag about being "Literal Virgins" but who did EVERYTHING ELSE under the sun. I don't think it's just the "act" that determines abstinence or not, but the intent. Like my girl from school used to say (*warning, crass but imho true statement coming up!*), God would have been just as upset w/ Adam and Eve for licking around the fruit, as He was w/ them biting it.

Serenity · #10 02-12-2001, 06:07 PM

Quote:

God would have been just as upset w/ Adam and Eve for licking around the fruit, as He was w/ them biting it.

LOL! Yup...I'd have to agree with you on that one.

[This message has been edited by Serenity (edited February 12, 2001).]

Rain Man · #11 02-13-2001, 01:32 AM

I am feeling a VERY good vibe in here. AlphaChiGirl, I hear you on this latest thing with abstainance being everything but "the ultimate thing", which is sad.

IMHO, males are more pressured by peers to lose their virginity than females b/c it seems to be "taught" that virginity in not a manly thing to be. I heard all the crass jokes such as.

"You 'gon hit 40 and it's gonna be *sound of a massive explosion*"
"Your n*ts must be in your stomach by now"
"How do you relieve all that tension?"
"Is something wrong with you? Are you gay? Don't you like women?"

Why is morality taking a back seat to hedonism? I wanna hear more fellas respond.

RM