Interracial dating question

[Dionysus]

Why are there so many black male/white female and White male/Asian female couples?......opposed to the other way around.

http://www.census.gov/population/soc...terractab1.txt

I think I know the answer, but I want to hear it from the horses mouths.

*something telling me that I won't get a serious anwser*


Disclaimer: I am NOT saying that I agree nor disagree with the following (except for the second)...this is what I HEARD. I'm speaking in general also.

*Asian females like white guys because they do not demand submissiveness as much as Asian guys. They believe white males also more stereotypically masculine.

*White guys like Asian girls because they are more submissive than white girls (I STRONGLY disagree with this).

*Black guys like white girls for the same reason, they believe white girls are more submissive than black girls.

[xok85xo]

i'm not sure where you're going with this,but i'll bite..

my friend is a white male and he is dating an asian female.

[sigmagrrl]

Not touching this one...

[Dionysus]

Originally posted by smiley21
a little nervous about answering this but here i go.....
it may depend on where you live geographically...
as much as i like diversity, i wish everyone was one color so topics like this wouldnt be necessary...
side note: i am a black female who has been in three interracial relationships. (the guys were white)
its not like i go around thinking, 'gotta find a white guy..'
it is just the area i live in isnt that diverse. there are a lot of black guys at my school but i have actually been told that i am imtimidating to them. my shyness has been misinterpretted as stuck up. anyway, even if someone who was white said that i only want to date asian girls- what is wrong with that? it is no different from saying that i want to date people who are tall. just as long as the racial preference isnt a sign of prejudice. there nothing wrong with choosing mates by race. cause it is about being happy.

I'm not condemning at all, just curious why I see those two combinations the most, especially the white/male asian female combo. There's a lot of theory about the black male/white female combo, but I'm not too familiar with the other combo that much, I haven't even noticed it until recently.

[Sistermadly]

Interracial couples are part of the norm here, no one even refers to them as interracial couples. I've seen all kinds of mixes here, and I think it just boils down to that you found someone who "gets you" and you decide to spend some time with them.

A couple of the more interesting mixes I've seen: A black female/asian male couple who live in my neighbourhood, and a Filipina female/Sikh (Indian) male couple who were featured in a newspaper feature about the "New Canada".

[sigmagrrl]

I will add this: interracial children are some of the most beautiful children I have EVER seen...I love their features, creamy complexions...Stunning..

[lovelyivy84]

Originally posted by smiley21
quite frankly, i like interracial couples. it adds 'color' to the normal everday life. and the children that come from those relationships- i love the skin complexions!

See that's a dangerous statement- you get into all those good skin/bad skin good hair/bad hair debates.

On topic: I date interacially, not on a regular or exclusive basis. I just date who I like, and often that is not black men, simply because at school and on the job I meet less of them than hispanic and white men. Also I am waaaaay different from a lot of the black men with whom I come in contact (fraternity men excluded- they often have similar experiences). I am from the BX but my mentality, language and style is if not preppy, then strongly leaning in that direction. My comfort level is higher around someone who talks like me and is familiar with my interests. Unfortunately, that is often not the case with brothas.

But to be realllllly honest, on some level I think there is an appeal to the "other". For me growing up around black men (sorta), white men ARE the other and that gets my attention sometimes. Ultimately it comes down to the personality and how we interact.

[valkyrie]

Originally posted by Dionysus
Black guys like white girls for the same reason, they believe white girls are more submissive than black girls.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *thunk*

Okay, that was me falling out of my chair from laughing so hard.

That aside, I think it's probably true. There are some white women out there who are rather lacking in the self esteem department and they probably *are* more submissive than many black women.

Of course that doesn't apply to all of us.

[DZHBrown]

My best friend dates interacially, but I do not. Her reasoning in dating black men (besides being attracted to them, obviously!) is that black men are more stylish and know the right things to say. Although she's dating a white man now, it was funny when she was describing him to me. She said she really liked him, but she was surprised because he wasn't her type - he was ex-military and he was white.

[lovelyivy84]

Originally posted by smiley21
i dont see how i made a dangerous statement. in no way did i imply that other people's skin look bad. i just like that some people arent afraid to step away from the norm. that being said, i pointed out that i like the skin color on people of a multiracial background-it looks beautiful. just because i like one doesnt mean i dont like others. in fact, i like all skin colors. i was just pointing out that particular one. and about the bad hair- people who have bad hair means that they cant take care of it not because of their race.

The statement wasn't meant as an attack, just an observation. It is easy to go from the attitude of liking certain skin tones/hair textures to thinking they're better. Especially considering the history of privileges those colors and textures signify. Not in YOUR case, just in GENERAL.

Edited for spelling

[sugar and spice]

Originally posted by smiley21
i dont see how i made a dangerous statement. in no way did i imply that other people's skin look bad. i just like that some people arent afraid to step away from the norm. that being said, i pointed out that i like the skin color on people of a multiracial background-it looks beautiful. just because i like one doesnt mean i dont like others. in fact, i like all skin colors. i was just pointing out that particular one. and about the bad hair- people who have bad hair means that they cant take care of it not because of their race.

Your statement kind of implies that biracial babies are more attractive than those that are only one race . . . thus, half-white/half-black babies are more attractive than those with darker skin tones, kinkier hair and broader features. Ditto for half-Asian/half-white babies that may have lighter hair, less slanted eyes . . . I have a friend who says that most of her Asian-American friends consider those with one Asian parent and one white parent more attractive than those of full Asian blood because their features are somewhat "softened" and "Americanized." I know it can go the other way (biracial children are prettier than white children) but it's rarely taken to mean that.

I know that's probably not what you meant, but it gets into dangerous territory.

Plus the generalities ("all biracial babies . . . ") can lead into the whole ethnic fetishization thing.

[Gina1201]

I'll bite. . .

I had a friend, who I dated for a while, in high school. He has a very dark complexion. It seemed like after a while he started dating exclusively white women. So I, being nosey, asked him why. Sidenote: We went to a predominately white private school. He stated that he would probably end up marrying a white woman also. His reasoning was that he did not want his children to go through what he went through while he was younger, i.e. being teased about being darker. He knows that, more likely than not, if he has children with a non-AA woman that his children will be lighter in complexion. That's his reasoning ONLY not ALL AA men.

[lovelyivy84]

My black male friends date who they like. More often than not that is white women. I can't criticize really because my black female friends didn't like them and as they are like brothers to me, I am CERTAINLY not getting involved with them.

They have yet to approve of any of the black men I've dated though (granted they have been right about them 99.9% of the time). Hmm.

[FiReKraCkEr]

Originally posted by Dionysus
*Asian females like white guys because they do not demand submissiveness as much as Asian guys. They believe white males also more stereotypically masculine.

*White guys like Asian girls because they are more submissive than white girls (I STRONGLY disagree with this).

HOLY CRAPEMS!!!!

NO you didn't!

I am an "asian" female and I can tell you right now I am not freaking "submissive". I don't take isht from ANYONE.

[AlphaGamDiva]

i think this thread was a sign...............

to be continued......