What is happening here?

rainbowbrightCS · #1 09-25-2003, 10:32 PM

When I first join every one was very panhellic and was for greek unity. But know people are getting so nasty that they are closing thread all over the place. Not just in the Rush forum but in the chit-chat forum and in actaul greek org. forums. Is this what happenes after rush? That every intiated member gets mean and turns different from the apparence that you "protrayed" from pre-rush and rush, now that is it over its time to see the truth and see every girl for who she really is.

Before I wanted to rush so bad and be apart of some wonderfull sisterhood. Because as many of you said "no matter what the letter, we are greek together" So I felt confidenent that no matter what my decision would be I would be backed up... no I am guesing that this "sorority" think is really just a bunch of whining girls who have to much money in their banks..... That a person (PNM, NM or sister) is in fear to post her true feelings, that is may send a pack of wild girls attacking her and her character.

If a girl is cut, there is always a reason, whether is it numbers or the girl did not just fit, or something happened at the party. We were not their, nor do we know this person really well. I am tired of hearing that a sorority is "bad" for cutting her.

Yet when a girl is using GC basically as a diary to write how she feels if she says one thing negative, even if it about the house or the songs or god-forbid a rushee then she is aloof or "too good" for that group.

MAKE UP YOUR MIND.... WHO ARE YOU GOING TO SIDE WITH THE PNM OR THE SORORITY!

Either this place needs to go back to the happy place of love and sisterhood that makes me want to be part of it or I think that this may show me what true "greek unity" is...and that I don't want to be apart of (both Greekchat and Greek Life in general)

If this is too long from your sentive eyes then I am sorry, I don't care.

Chris, a very discoraged PNM

<soapbox>

DZHBrown · #2 09-25-2003, 11:25 PM

If you'll notice, not everyone is like what you're describing.

honeychile · #3 09-25-2003, 11:40 PM

Chris, please don't paint everyone with the same broad brush. I do think that the strain of recruitment has a few tempers smoldering (yes, it's hard on both sides of the coin!), and we need to remember to act more like ladies. I also think that there are some PNMs who, in their happiness, haven't yet adopted a very panhellenic outlook - which is normal. I'm sure that will be addressed by their New Member Educators, and they'll understand. We're all human. We just need the occasional reminder to also be ladies.

GPhiBLtColonel · #4 09-25-2003, 11:44 PM

There ARE some ultra sensitive GCer's who get their underwear in a knot in the face of negative comments about their GLO or school or what have you...but there are also just as many -- probably even more GCer's who DO embody that Panhel spirit you mentioned...I think if there is a specific gripe you have -- and it sounds like it's legitimate...contact a moderator or a senior GCer about what's fair or not...Personally, I think one of the MOST panhellenically/fraternally minded GCer's in the world is Tom Earp! Use him as a sounding board because he is also a moderator... I personally don't know what you are specifically referring to but don't give up hope and let a few whiney apples spoil things for you! Good luck!

Kristin AGD · #5 09-25-2003, 11:53 PM

In these same threads I have seem some very admirable panhellenic GC'ers. There will always be the other. But I truly value the ones that share their knowledge, and want what is best for the PNMs, even when their own house is under discussion. They make me really proud to be greek. To me they exemplify what being greek is all about!
I tend to skip over the negative talk, and focus on the comments with something worthwhile to contribute. They are there, I promise.

FuzzieAlum · #6 09-25-2003, 11:56 PM

I'm not going to "side with" either one of them. I don't know anything about any PNM (I mean, she could be a lonely 80 year old housebound man), and 99% of the time I don't know anything about the chapters either.

Now I take it on faith that the PNM is really what she claims to be. But we don't see ourselves the way others see us (and maybe we are even right, not the others!), so I can't say "bad chapter" for cutting her. My chapter (and almost every chapter) won't say why we cut someone, after all.

I don't think either the PNM or the chapter should be bashed. And to be honest, I haven't been seeing that here on GC. I'm not sure what you are noticing that I'm not.

Edited to add - OK, I think I've seen the thread you're referring to. But just like anything else - work, class, even your chapter - there will always be someone(s) who you don't agree with. Just because we're Greek doesn't mean we're all perfect, either. Look around and see, is it one or two people you have a problem with? Or is it the vast majority of GCers? If it's the latter, yeah, rethink rushing. But if it's the former - just don't join that person's chapter!

honeychile · #7 09-26-2003, 12:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FuzzieAlum
I don't know anything about the PNM (I mean, she could be a lonely 80 year old housebound man),

WONDERFUL imagery!!!

As a geriatric counselor, I immediately pictured a certain client, logging onto GreekChat with the screen name of Deb2B, moaning that "she" was cut from a sorority because "she" wore fluffy bunny slippers to first rounds...

FuzzieAlum · #8 09-26-2003, 12:07 AM

I'm not going to "side with" either one of them. I don't know anything about the PNM (I mean, she could be a lonely 80 year old housebound man), and 99% of the time I don't know anything about the chapters either.

Now I take it on faith that the PNM is really what she claims to be. But we don't see ourselves the way others see us (and maybe we are even right, not the others!), so I can't say "bad chapter" for cutting her. My chapter (and almost every chapter) won't say why we cut someone, after all.

I don't think either the PNM or the chapter should be bashed. And to be honest, I haven't been seeing that here on GC. I'm not sure what you are noticing that I'm not.

But I do know - in real life, offline - I've seen chapters cut girls who would be perfect for them. And I've seen girls who think they're all that and a bag of chips whose worlds just end when they one and only chapter they want cuts them. I wouldn't call that out here if I saw it, but maybe there are other GCers who are more blunt than me.

SparkliiQTMTSU · #9 09-26-2003, 01:18 AM

I have been around GC for awhile and yes there are some CGers that do get offesive if anything bad is said about their GLO. However I know that from my own experiences most of the people are just giving advice even if it seems a bit harsh. I love all my GC friends and they have helped me out alot **BTW I may be looking into SAI for the Spring

* anyways off of that lol I know that some people do not agree with what some say but you shouldnt take offense to it. It's not something that is that big of a deal to get all worked up about. blah ok thats all I can think of right now but I love ya guys

Nichole

#10 09-26-2003, 03:20 AM

The majority of us here online went into our own Rush/Recruitment and received bids WITHOUT GREEKCHAT...and we've all done well so far.

Rush threads are exciting, but I have to admit that I am a bit wary about how they sometimes can end up. It's not always the storybook ending you want it to be. I really do feel for a PNM who ends up dropping out of rush. Though I don't know how it feels like firsthand, I can imagine how it feels like to be crushed that way.

BUT -- posting your rush story is taking a big risk. You take the risk of people finding out who you are, and these days it doesn't take a PI to do that. You can secret code your GLOs all you want, but trust me, it's not hard to figure out! What you may consider "honest" may be "offensive" to other people...and that's a bitch. On some campuses, that can determine whether or not you get a BID anywhere.

FWIW, I don't side with anyone. I don't know the PNM and I don't know the sorority well enough to base a valid judgement of whose "more in the right".

rainbowbrightCS, I've been here for a number of years now, and to my knowledge, GC was never a perfect utopia of love and sisterhood. If I were you I wouldn't rely on GC to determine what I really wanted in my own life.

If I were you, I wouldn't assume that GreekChat is a microcosm of what Greek Life really is.

rainbowbrightCS · #11 09-26-2003, 08:15 AM

I am sorry, yesterday was a really bad day for me and I took my anger out on every one here.

I found out two horible things yesterday.

1) my brother who is a Marine and is supposed to get out the Monday before Thanksgiving, may be ordered to stay in for another 6 month (if not more) and he may go back to the middle east.... key word is "go back"

the second thing is about my dad, my dad has lung and bone cancer. Yet yesterday we found out he also has kidney cancer. The worse part is the hospital that we go to that have to drive 3 or 4 times a week is about a 1 1/2 hour drive (one way). We still don't know if it is worth putting him through chemo...

I am sorry.... I was just upset and one or two threads just pushed me over the edge.

Chris

Floridagirl · #12 09-26-2003, 08:30 AM

I am really sorry about your dad. My dad died of colon cancer when he was only 59. This situation makes all this greek stuff look very insignificant. Hope your dad does better.

Little E · #13 09-26-2003, 08:50 AM

I'm really sorry to hear about your father, and your brother. My prayers are with you and your family.

Tau love
Lil E

White_Chocolate · #14 09-26-2003, 09:22 AM

did i miss something?

honeychile · #15 09-26-2003, 09:50 AM

Oh, Chris, what a horrible amount of emotional strain! My thoughts are with you right now, and I pray for some spiritual peace in your heart.

**Big Ole Hug**

You take care, now!