Greeks celebrate house sweethearts

[The1calledTKE]

http://www.dailyillini.com/oct02/oct..._story06.shtml

[Optimist Prime]

Exactly how it should be done!!! I would love to be sweetheart/big bro to a sorority. Should hang out more you think. Yeah.


p.s.

I still love you, Chi O.

[KappaTarzan]

so sweet
the fraternities around here usually have sweethearts but i haven't heard of our sororities having them... maybe we should start though

[honeychile]

Didn't most Nationals - or at least the sororities - do away with this years ago? We had a special guy who we called our "Black Diamond Beau" (BDB for short), until we were asked to discontinue the process.

In a weird twist, one sister got to know a then-unknown John Travolta, and he was our Black Diamond Beau one year! His picture was even on the composite!

honeychile

[DRau]

Originally posted by honeychile
Didn't most Nationals - or at least the sororities - do away with this years ago? We had a special guy who we called our "Black Diamond Beau" (BDB for short), until we were asked to discontinue the process.

Alpha Phi at UCSB used to have a big brother program as well, but I can't think for the LIFE of me what they called them (Men of Ivy seems familiar). There are photo albums from the 80's in our library that are dedicated to Big Brother activities and Big Brother Rush. We even have a 'Big Brother Chair' on the composites from this time. Sounded pretty cool, not sure why the programs were abolished but I'm sure there's a good reason.

[KellyO97]

I know that Chi Omega has rules against Big/Little-Brother/Sister programs between fraternities and sororities. I don't have the rule in front of me, but I guess the explaination has to do with the fact that being a Little Sister or having a Big Brother doesn't have much to do with our greater purposes. I think another factor could be that at some schools, getting these titles involved hazing, drinking, and other "unbecoming" activities to gain membership. It's too bad.....I think it sounds like fun the way Illinois does it.

[33girl]

I think that having ONE sweetheart that's an honorary type thing is still kosher for most everyone, but having a little brother/little sister program has been eradicated for a couple reasons:

1. It threatened the groups' single-sex status.
2. It took time away for whoever was running the program, that they should have been putting into the fraternity/sorority.
3. The image that all little sisters did was (to quote my ex) clean the house and bleep the brothers. Not true, by the way.

I've seen both ends of the spectrum, from groups that were basically just bleep-buddies, to groups that were more well run than some of the sororities on campus. I had no problem whatsoever with them, but some sorority women did.

[MysticCat]

Originally posted by 33girl (in part)
I think that having ONE sweetheart that's an honorary type thing is still kosher for most everyone, but having a little brother/little sister program has been eradicated . . . .

That's how it is for us. One sweetheart is okay, but a little sister organization is not okay. In addition to the reasons that you gave, we also outlawed little sister groups because they might be perceived as competing with sororities and because of that other, ever-present reason: liability risks.

[OnePlus69Is70]

I have to say that removing traditions because they lack a greater purpose is foolish. Greek organizations are honestly pretty inefficient and strange when you consider them on the basis on their stated purposes- there are better ways to do things to do what we do, but not more enjoyable ways.

I'm glad we're a local. We always have a sweetheart- usually someone's girlfriend, or a girl who's just hanging around the house constantly- a couple semester's ago it was my best friend.

We also have a women's aux. group, sometimes, usually made up of our girlfriends. They do nice things (last year they made us our birthday cake), and they help decorate for parties. I can say that we're in no danger of going co-ed because of it, too- that seems like such an old-fashioned way to think.

[Optimist Prime]

Apparently some parts of ritual were revealed to women

Ours was called Daugthers of The Crossed Swords. I think Cindy Crawford was one. We can have a dreamgirl/sweetheart/carnation/whatever. But I think it is BS. I don't want girls wearing my letters. I think one of the requirements should be that she must be in a sorority. but even mentioning that causes......drama.

[LatinaAlumna]

I have a question, and it's just a question. By no means am I trying to criticize your way of doing things. I'm just trying to understand.

My question is this: How do women feel about being referred to as a fraternity man's "little sister"? Are you not his equal? I understand the concept of having "big sister/little sister" within a sorority, because usually this involves a mentoring-type relationship. I guess I'm just trying to understand how it works between fraternities and sororities. I don't know...I just couldn't see myself being referred to as a man's "lil sis," unless he was a blood brother.

I don't really see how it's degrading or anything like that.... I've always thought of it like the fraternity man (or men) by being a big brother was symbolically taking on the responsibility of looking out for you, being there to support you, and establishing a general cross-gender bond of brother/sisterhood very much like the sisterhood within an organization. I don't really see how that makes you not their equal?

[DZetaBiotch]

I'm at Illinois and we just voted on our new semester's house sweetheart It's weird to see how traditions like this that are really common and accepted are viewed as illegal at other schools! Gotta love the internet...

A sweetheart is basically just a guy or girl who typically gets along with most of the house. Usually, in our house at least, it's someone's boyfriend, and that someone is usually an upperclassman. A good sweetheart does stuff for the house, like brings candy and gifts or helps out with tasks. He's not required to do anything but it's appreciated! The SigEp sweetheart last year made a jack o'lantern for the guys with their letters carved in it. It's not viewed as a house slut position at all-- it's actually considered a big honor and houses will take out ads in the school paper congratulating the sweetheart on his new status!

[KappaKittyCat]

Originally posted by LatinaAlumna
My question is this: How do women feel about being referred to as a fraternity man's "little sister"? Are you not his equal? I understand the concept of having "big sister/little sister" within a sorority, because usually this involves a mentoring-type relationship. I guess I'm just trying to understand how it works between fraternities and sororities.

As far as I know, here at Larry U. we don't have Sweethearts. I wish we did. I think it sounds sweet. As for the little sisters program, I think that was the point made when it was outlawed. In a lot of cases, the little sisters were more or less a combined fraternity harem and maid service. If a woman wants a fraternal experience, she can join a fraternity/sorority.

My best friend on campus is a Phi Kappa Tau. He's also younger than I am. I call him my big brother. Why? He looks out for me. He has done so since we were kids. He gives me guy advice. He's also more than a foot taller than I, but that doesn't have so much to do with it. But the interesting thing is that he calls me his big sister. Why? I look out for him. If he's trying to pull something, I call him on it. I proofread his papers. I give him girl advice. We tell each other everything and we take care of each other.

My point is that "big brother" is more of a role that's played, not a status symbol. It can switch in a heartbeat. If a woman becomes dependent on "big brothers," then she needs to assert herself. I don't see that as being okay. But if she's a perfectly independent person in her own right, then having a few well-meaning guys to keep drunk party guests off her back can only be a plus.

I hope that clears some things up.

[Optimist Prime]

Theta Chi recognises women who help us as friends of the fraternity. If they happen to be sisters, wives, fiances, or mothers of brothers, that brother may get them a sweetheart pin. The sweetheart pin is the same as our badge only smaller.