Treated like I'm stupid

MoxieGrrl · #1 10-23-2002, 04:55 PM

Ok, here is the deal.......

My two co-workers treat me like I'm a complete moron. That's pretty much the crux of the problem. Any advice on what to do in a situation like this? I have some theories on this, but I'd like to hear people's ideas/advice first.

Dionysus · #2 10-23-2002, 05:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MoxieGrrl
Ok, here is the deal.......

My two co-workers treat me like I'm a complete moron. That's pretty much the crux of the problem. Any advice on what to do in a situation like this? I have some theories on this, but I'd like to hear people's ideas/advice first.

Ahhh...been there done that.

Look at it this way, you can do all the scheming you want now, they will more likely put it pass you. The people who I screwed over the most were those who thought I was dumb. Often times I intentionally come off as not being too bright.

There's a saying, I don't remember exactly: One who thinks others are foolish are the most easy to fool.

ChiOJenn78 · #3 10-23-2002, 05:22 PM

Call them on it. Not in a loud, hostile way, but I would say something in your defense. Some of the MD's at the hospital treat us like we're complete idiots/don't know anything/ supposed to treat them like gods. Sometimes you have to get in their face and say, "Excuse me, but I am a human being, and you need to treat me as such-with the respect you would give anyone else. I am not an idiot, and I am not here to be your servant. I do have an idea of what I'm doing, I will work with you, but it would be alot easier for all involved if you didn't treat me like garbage/a child..blah blah blah"

Something to that extent should work. Just be calm and don't get confrontational. Then, if they still treat you like an idiot, start plotting.

XOMichelle · #4 10-23-2002, 10:07 PM

Hmm... that's a tough one actually. You might not want to make a bold move like Jenn suggested. They will most likely use any outburst/ confrontation to fuel their dislike/ image of you (ie, "not only is she stupid, she's haughty too!")
The best thing to do is to prove them wrong. Do something they don't expect of you, and do it well. Beat them to their own game, catch their mistakes. If other people (esp your boss) respect you and your work, and they still don't, then you might try and let a small comment about your abilities slide out in front of them. Perhaps you can fanagle your boss into complimenting you while they are around. Above all else, keep your composure and professionalism.
I hope you are sucessful in changing their behavior!
-M

aephi alum · #5 10-24-2002, 09:16 AM

I'm in precisely that situation right now. I'm working part-time as an admin while waiting for the market to recover. The head admin was out yesterday, so she gave me a list of things to do in her absence, including: "I tried to install some software on my computer and it didn't work. Call _____ company and have them come and install the software." My degree is in computer science for crying out loud!! I uninstalled and reinstalled the software - it took me all of 5 minutes and it works perfectly - and I left her a note saying "I fixed it!"

I'd stay away from being confrontational, and rather, kill them with kindness. Pull off some minor miracle - something they don't know how to do, or better yet, something they should have known how to do - and make sure the boss knows about it. Above all, stay calm.

Hope this helps

MoxieGrrl · #6 10-24-2002, 10:00 AM

Thanks for the good advice everyone! I will definitely try these suggestions out. To tell you the truth, I don't have the guts to confront them on any level on this because I'm always afraid that even going in with polite intentions, I'm just going to go off......so, the amazing them with my astounding work ethic and knowledge of the field is the way for me to go

FYI: I work in psych research......we're all in an office together (it's a big office) & we all kind of have to depend on each other to get the data collected.

James · #7 10-24-2002, 09:13 PM

There are little things you can do if you can rescript yourself.

Usually the person who is doing this likes to feel a little better than others. Maybe you are too pretty, or too young looking. Something that allows them to feel a little superior.

If you want to trade on the psychology of things . . . .

Ok some easy things . . .

When you ask them a question, accept their answer and hold their eye for an extra beat . . . and another thing step slightly into their personal space and say "OK If you are absolutely sure . . ." or something like it. And then immediately walk away.

Ask them rehtorical questions. Ask them questions that go against their insecurities . . . Like "Are you feeling ok ?" OR "Did you get enough sleep last night?" Just Curious . . .

Remember, when you ask other people questions you place them at a disadvantage.

Which is good as long as you don't work for the person.

Subtle intimidation is soooooo easy and can be fun.

Quote:

Originally posted by MoxieGrrl
Thanks for the good advice everyone! I will definitely try these suggestions out. To tell you the truth, I don't have the guts to confront them on any level on this because I'm always afraid that even going in with polite intentions, I'm just going to go off......so, the amazing them with my astounding work ethic and knowledge of the field is the way for me to go

FYI: I work in psych research......we're all in an office together (it's a big office) & we all kind of have to depend on each other to get the data collected.

James · #8 10-24-2002, 09:14 PM

OH, and if they are really getting under your skin, chances are you are kind of a serious person that takes advice and criticism to heart.

That can be a really good thing. But it does leave you open to people that just want to make you feel a little like shit.

Think about that

Tom Earp · #9 10-24-2002, 09:54 PM

PEOPLE ARE FU#KING MORONS!

I have been in management ever sice college in 1949!

So, how many of you have been in positions to make decicions of magnatuide which can change the world for people?

James, I some times like your smugness, but times you are off of the base and I picked you off.

If you aint been there, then be you and not someone else who acts like he is the most important and egocentrictic self.

You and I both do things that set people off to see what happens. But, you are getting a little self imposed with self imprtance with Some of the Posts!

Reread your posts backing UF-Pike! I like it when he is a normal person, but he and you can you can get a little off square! Si?

Think I will go eat some Honey Roasted Peanuts!

James · #10 10-24-2002, 10:25 PM

I think you may also be drifting off base here, if you are going to lambast me because you disgree with my viewpoints in several areas , would you pleae address them individually at those threads rather than saving them up and kind of letting me have it for all of them at once?

Makes it easier for me to respond.

Thank you Tom

Quote:

Originally posted by Tom Earp
PEOPLE ARE FU#KING MORONS!

I have been in management ever sice college in 1949!

So, how many of you have been in positions to make decicions of magnatuide which can change the world for people?

James, I some times like your smugness, but times you are off of the base and I picked you off.

If you aint been there, then be you and not someone else who acts like he is the most important and egocentrictic self.

You and I both do things that set people off to see what happens. But, you are getting a little self imposed with self imprtance with Some of the Posts!

Reread your posts backing UF-Pike! I like it when he is a normal person, but he and you can you can get a little off square! Si?

Think I will go eat some Honey Roasted Peanuts!