I need help!

SSS1365 · #1 10-18-2002, 01:47 PM

I am in a situation where I am living with one of my sorority sisters and we were also roommates in college. I've gotten to the point where I dread being around her because she's changed a lot and we just have very different personalities. I don't want to be childish and trash-talk her so I won't go into details, but basically she just is very hard for me to live with. Our lease is not up until June and we are living 25 miles from where I work, which is another big reason I want to move out. 25 miles may seem like no big deal to some, but in the suburbs of DC it is a big deal. So my boyfriend's sister lives in a townhouse that's about 6 miles from where I work, and she and her roommates are looking for a roommate now, and she offered it to me. I really love the house and the location and I want to move there more than anything. Problem is I don't know how to tell my roommate. Technically I can't move out if she isn't okay with it because I am legally bound to the terms of the lease, and I feel bad forcing her to find another roommate. I have my differences with her, but I'm not the kind of person who will just screw someone over. But on the other hand, I feel like if I don't get out of there I am going to snap. I have avoided confrontation with her but I don't know how much longer I can continue to do that. I have a feeling that we will end up hating each other if we continue to live together. So, does anyone have any ideas on how to approach the subject? Sorry about the long explanation

AlphaSigLana · #2 10-18-2002, 01:53 PM

See if anyone could take your place. See if you can post stuff on your campus bulletins/ website. My previous college has an office campus housing site and on the site there are subtitles like: I need a roommate, I am looking for a place to live, I need someone to replace me etc. So that would be the best bet.
Explain to your roommate that you may be moving out bc you would prefer to live closer to campus. If you want you cantell her that you think she is a great sister(even if you don't get a long with her), but you feel that it is too hard to live with such a good friend. I know 2 fraternity brothers that were living together and they knew it wouldn't work out so one moved, but they remained friends.

SSS1365 · #3 10-18-2002, 02:26 PM

Thanks for your advice, but maybe I should have clarified that we are no longer in college.

texas*princess · #4 10-18-2002, 02:48 PM

SSS,
maybe you could try to find someone to take your place that is also good friends with your current roomie?

if you want to avoid snapping, maybe you should just talk to her about the distance from your current place to your work. tell her you are thinking about getting a place closer to work to save money on gas and things like that.

sororitygirl2 · #5 10-18-2002, 04:40 PM

Just tell her that a really great opportunity has come up and it would make it so much easier for you to have a shorter commute. Let her know that you will not bail without having your spot taken care of, but that if she doesn't mind, you would like to be able to move. Talk about it and just be honest and see what options work for her (like, does she want you to find someone, is anyone okay or does it have to be one of her friends or is it okay if you put an ad in the paper... does she know anyone that is looking for a place, etc).

AlphaSigLana · #6 10-18-2002, 06:53 PM

i know that people were posting for roommates on the college site that no longer were in college. Or would you roomie hate living with a college student?

Blaire · #7 10-18-2002, 08:48 PM

I sorta know how you feel...I live with my best friend (shes in another sorority) one of my sorority sisters and my sister's best friend. Well they sometimes butt heads and it is very hard for me to not take sides. I try and play Switzerland, but it just doesn't work. Good luck...if shes truly a friend, she'll be okay with you moving.

Blaire