Bitchy post,sorry

AlphaSigLana · #1 09-14-2002, 01:23 PM

Last night I called my sorority house to see how everythinhg was going since last night was our bid night. I talked to my little sis and she was really depressed. We only got 13 girls in our house. we didn't make quota again. Whereas 3 of the five houses did. All of my little's rush crushes went to a different house-- the house that her roommate is in. Her roomie's sorority is known as the rich, skinny, beautiful girls--- our house is known as the fat bitches. My little sis was sad bc the girls we did get just help add credibility to what we our called. She said they are nice, but just like we do everyyear we pretty much give a bid to any girl that comes to our house and we have gotten some wackos.
I understand that just bc someone isn't pretty that they can't be good members. I am by no means gorgeous, but I do my best to look decent-- I color my hair, try to wear nice things etc. My sisters let themselves go. Girls that rush want to live up to an image---so they always go to the other houses.
I heard that the skit we did was so awesome and before rush all the houses get together to show their skits-one house did trl think for a second yr in row and my little's roomie's sorority didn't even show up. We had a great skit last yr too. My little doesn't understand why we couldn't get more girls bc we did an awesome job.
I didn't know what to tell her. The image our house gets is embarressing--it is no way a self-esteem boost. Fraternity's rarely do anything with us. She said she didn't even know if she wanted to be a member anymore bc we take anyone that walks through our door.
Sorry for the rambling--- I hoe you understood what I was trying to say.

Kevin · #2 09-14-2002, 02:17 PM

It's not so hard for a small house to do a complete 180. You need to convince your leadership (or become leadership and convince the membership) that there is a problem.

I think that being angry with your house and not acting on it is not only frustrating, but cannot really resolve the problem.

Rather than being negative, be positive and try to help the other folks in your house to understand that image IS important. People will not even take the time to get to know you unless you show them a positive image.

Tom Earp · #3 09-14-2002, 02:52 PM

Sweety, I can totally understand from where you come!

I met a guy who looked like a real dimwad and thought what the heck is he doing here!

Well today, this Briother is a ball of fire for the Chapter!

We were very quickly becoming the smallest chapter on campus!

We now have 22 new associates and looking for more!

This has already doubled our size and may triple it!

I am just trying to point out that if you try your hardest, you can over come your problems!

Be just you and only you as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but being a speacial person is something special!

Work on getting people who will help change the image! There are many selling tools that can draw people into you Org. Just find those peoples hot buttons and utilize it! Marketing and merchandising your Soroity and what it means! The bonding of the Sisterhood, something that they can become a part of and effect many changes and direct how the Org. changes and does things! Work with egos!

texas*princess · #4 09-14-2002, 02:56 PM

Hootie, those are excellent tips! Maybe they can have someone from your headquarters to help you girls during recruitment - what they are going to wear, how they are going to present themselves, etc.

I have read many posts on GC where Sisters even get their nails done, check each other's makeup, etc. to make sure they present themselves in a good light.

I can understand your concerns, especially if you want your house to survive on the campus.

It is just so sad that sometimes things do get a bit superficial (being the beautiful, rich, skinny girls or the "fat ******") in the greek world when founders created the organziations to upload special values. (At least it's just my opinion that founders didn't create sororities or fraternities with the goal of being the most beautiful, skinny or athletic, buff people on campus.) But I guess "image" is just another one of those things society places on us.

Optimist Prime · #5 09-14-2002, 04:23 PM

I"m sorry your chapter is having trouble. But hopefully It will get better.

CrimsonTide4 · #6 09-14-2002, 04:34 PM

I agree with what Hootie suggested. Might I also suggest that at a next chapter meeting or retreat that you all have a vent session. Call folks out if you have to. But at the end come up with 5 goals for the house as a whole ( I am doing this with one of my classes). For example, everyone in the house work out together as part of a health kick not just to beautify yourselves but as a commitment to living healthier. Then definitely have a Sisters night out where you all have a Mary KAy consultant come in and teach you all some glamour tips. But don't let the beautification happen for just one night, begin to look glamorous at all you do. To bridge the gap between you and the other sororities, have the Beauty Night be an open event with not only your house, but another house, and prospects as well for both houses as a unity event perhaps.

You might also have a GREEK WEEK (we had it at Wittenberg) and team up with other sororities and fraternities but keep those partnerships for the entire academic year.

Bottom line increasing your presence on the campus will go a long way and after all of that, if you are still small at least your sisterhood within the sorority will be stronger.

AlphaSigLana · #7 09-14-2002, 05:19 PM

Well I've moved so I am really not a part of my house any more. Believe me we have had many "emergency" meetings even advisors and members of housing corp have come. We have an awesome chapter advisor, but our house continues to let anyone who wants a bid to join our house.
One girl in my house always says we're so great bc we are diverse and we aren't cookie cutter, but no one that rushs really cares-some people do. Many freshman girls do want to be in a cookie cutter sorority. It is just like being in the popular group in high school--we all want to be in it, but eventually we realize we're not going to and we find our niche and have a great time, but sometimes it takes awhile to accept that. Everyone wants to fit in--no one wants to be different. WE get all the girls that our dropped by the other houses. luckily we did get 13 bc one house on our campus only got 5 girls. But everyone else made quota.

33girl · #8 09-14-2002, 05:34 PM

Lana,
As my thoughts are far too bitchy for public consumption I am PM'ing you.

texas*princess · #9 09-14-2002, 05:35 PM

AlphaSiglana,
I hope it works out for your chapter

Do you plan on going to the meeting if they schedule one?

Shine · #10 09-14-2002, 06:46 PM

Lana, I'm honestly not sure where you're coming from.

I can't tell if you're more worried that your sorority isn't cookie cutter and popular, becasue YOU don't want to be in a "loser sorority" or if it is truly because you want bigger numbers.

Not all sororities will have big numbers. There is supposed to be a sorority for every type of woman, not just the thin and beautiful ones. Just because someone is greek, doesn't mean they should feel forced to color their hair, do their nails, and look perfect every day. If all sororities were the cookie cutter popular ones, then there would be no place in Greek life for anyone of different races, economic levels, or body types.

But I guess my main question is: Why would you WANT the freshman girls that come to rush only to be in a superficial popular group? Don't you want women of better stock than that that come to rush to find a true sisterhood, not just a social life?

pbear19 · #11 09-14-2002, 07:08 PM

I have some questions, and I really don't mean for them to sound harsh or insensitive so I hope it doesn't come out that way. Do the women that were just given bids know that their new sisters consider them to be adding credibility to the house being known as "fat bitches"? Do they know that they were picked just for the sake of numbers? Do the women in the house right now know that some of their sisters consider them to be "wackos"?

I just know that if I were a new member, thrilled and excited to have gotten a bid and be a part of a sisterhood, and I found out that my sisters were sad that I got a bid and upset because I was helping to ruin the house's reputation, I would be devastated. And then I would be extremely pissed off, and I might not be too excited about improving the image of the house anymore.

Does this make sense? Maybe it would help to embrace the situation as it is right now before the members try and force makeovers on anyone. I'm sure there may be new members who know that they are looked down upon, but there may be a new member or two who is just terribly excited about the fact that she was given a bid and is accepted despite her appearance. When she finds out otherwise you might just lose her.

texas*princess · #12 09-14-2002, 07:32 PM

Shine & pbear19

Those are very excellent points

AlphaSigLana · #13 09-14-2002, 08:03 PM

THe sister I was referring to as wacko--- dropped out. She told everyone how she used to be addicted to crack etc. The last week of school she called me and said ," Be glad it is the last week of school or I would kick your ass for talking shit," She had been brought up to standards bc many girls had written letters of complaints regarding her behavior of disrepect etc. Standards had my letter out in plain view so that is why she said I talked shit.
No I don't care if our house isn't perfect.
On another note---four of my sisters were in a car together and hit a guy that was walking. He was a drunk(not that that makes the situation better) and they didn't see him. He flipped up over the car and is now in critical condiiton. My sisters are fine except emotionally.

Shine · #14 09-14-2002, 08:08 PM

Point blank, if you're embarrased to be in your sorority, or embarassed that your sisters perpetuate the "fat bitch" stereotype, you should really consider leaving.

You should love you sorority for what it is, not what it could be, or what you wish it was.

breathesgelatin · #15 09-14-2002, 08:48 PM

hey i'm PMing you...