Who's job is it too...

DawnDZ · #1 07-07-2004, 01:04 PM

Make all the moves or most of them...

First which of these scenarios do you prefer?
Option 1:
Girl approaches guy, buys him a drink. They talk for a while and girl gets guys number. Girl calls guy next day/later that week, and asks him out to dinner/movie/play/coffee/etc.

Option 2:
Guy approaches girl, buys her a drink. They talk for a while and guy gets girls number. Guy calls girl next day/later that week, and asks her out to dinner/movie/play/coffee/etc.

Which is more accepted or expected? What are the rules with option 1? Should the girl pay for the date, decide where they go, etc? I realize guys want women to take more control but how much control and when is it appropriate? Do you think women who make all the moves are aggressive or sexy? Do you think women who wait for the guy to approach are too passive and antiquated? Do you think that guys who expect the girl to make the first move are too passive or modern? What are the roles so to speak. Are either of these scenarios dealbreakers?

sigtau305 · #2 07-07-2004, 01:39 PM

I'm flexable with either scenerio. But, there more expectations upon the man to make the first move. A woman who makes the first move is aggressive because She sees what she wants and go after it. It may be a turn-off depending on one's opinion.

_Opi_ · #3 07-07-2004, 01:44 PM

If its the first date, generally it would be the initiator.

As far as other dates go, I would say splitting the check. I don't feel comfortable with the guy coming out of his pocket all the time (unless he's rich...in that case..well you know). I don't think one partner should make all the moves, it might show that the other partner is not putting too much effort into the relationship.

cuaphi · #4 07-07-2004, 01:46 PM

If you want to walk right up and buy a guy a drink go for it. Personally I prefer to just send him the greenlight (smile, eye contact, etc.) and he can take over from there. I only pay if it was my idea or an event that I dragged him to (i.e. - my friends.) Otherwise it's dutch or he pays.

XOMichelle · #5 07-08-2004, 10:46 AM

Well, I think courtsey would dictate that if a guy and girl have been talking at a bar for a while, and they have empty drinks that the guy buy a girl a drink. If I went to go talk to a guy and we were having a good time, went to the bar and he only ordered a drink for himself, I would assume he was trying to get rid of me. There is something nice about boys who open doors and buy drinks. I have to say I like it.

However, I am a big believer of making the first move. If there is a guy somewhere and I like him, I better go talk to him before he thinks I'm not interested!

bgsugirlie · #6 07-12-2004, 01:09 AM

Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I believe the only thing a girl should chase is a shot. I like a man who can come up to me, express interest, open doors, and pay for our first date. I think women need to reciprocate and do nice things for their guy...but I personally like when the man makes the first move.