Sorority Member Kicked Out Over Photo

[LaneSig]

Know that I'm not trying to stir anything up. I saw this article this morning.

http://www.wowt.com/home/headlines/O...375200821.html

Surely there's more to it than just the shirt she has on.

[Kevin]

I don't understand how this made it into the news. Greek organizations dismiss members all of the time for all kinds of reasons. Posing in letters for a photo posted on Tinder--which I understand is used to find semi-anonymous hookups, seems as valid a ground for dismissal as any.

[Sciencewoman]

It sounds like she and/or her mom contacted the media to vent/publicize the situation.

[clemsongirl]

That photo is neither provocative nor risque, and if the chapter didn't make it clear ahead of time that photos with letters in them were not allowed to be used in dating and hookup apps then they shouldn't suddenly change the rules and remove a member for using one in that manner. I do have a feeling that there's more to the story than just this, but on its surface this seems unfair to me.

[Sciencewoman]

I think we're getting one side of the story....

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by Sciencewoman

I think we're getting one side of the story....

Ya think? I would think the daughter would be mortified that her mother basically outed her to the world, probably forever, that daughter maintained a Tinder profile. I would think those are the sorts of things people prefer to keep private?

[AZTheta]

I had read another article (or two) about this a week or so ago. What I recall, without pulling up the article(s), briefly, is this: claims that the chapter advisor(s) is (are) on a "witch hunt", that many members are being terminated "unjustly", and that this type of action (discipline/termination/what have you) is endemic in the chapter. No response from the "other side" and I don't expect to see one, either. Nor should I. It's none of my business, frankly.

I'm with Sciencewoman; IMO we are definitely getting only one side of the story. With private membership organizations, just as long as they are following their own policies/procedures, they can pretty much do what they choose to do. Not for me to judge what is or isn't a valid reason for dismissal.

[clemsongirl]

Originally Posted by Kevin

Ya think? I would think the daughter would be mortified that her mother basically outed her to the world, probably forever, that daughter maintained a Tinder profile. I would think those are the sorts of things people prefer to keep private?

Having a Tinder profile is not a big deal at all...lots of college students do, lots don't. People reference them in conversation frequently. It's not something shameful or scandalous, at least on my campus. That said, I probably still wouldn't want my mom talking about it to the local news.

[Tulip86]

Originally Posted by clemsongirl

Having a Tinder profile is not a big deal at all...lots of college students do, lots don't. People reference them in conversation frequently. It's not something shameful or scandalous, at least on my campus. That said, I probably still wouldn't want my mom talking about it to the local news.

Agreed, for most college students it's just another dating app, not really used for hookups, mainly dating.

[LIXO]

Bringing someone in for a personnel violation is not something a chapter enjoys doing. I trust the executive board and their decision.

[ComradesTrue]

I agree this sounds very one sided. Reading between the lines it sounds like the chapter tried to work with her but she had no interest in complying with early requests. In other words, the first visit to Personnel could have been "we don't mind you having a Tinder account, but we prefer that you do so without wearing our letters in your profile."

She refused.

Second trip to Personnel: We are requesting that you take down the photo of you in letters from your profile.

She refuses and gets mouthy. There are small consequences from the chapter.

She decides to take a stand on this.

The chapter doesn't budge.

After several attempts at reconciling the situation she is given an ultimatum, to which she continues to refuse to take the picture down.

Termination.

*****
I don't know whether I would agree with the original position by the sorority. I am happily married and have been since long before Tender came on the scene so am honestly not familiar with it and what it may or may not imply. However, I see this like everything else in Greek membership: sometimes there will be policies that we may not agree with, but for the sake of the whole we give up a few personal liberties.

When a request that is easy to accommodate is presented, just follow the request. This is all so dumb. There is NO WAY they terminated her on her first ever visit to Personnel, nor the first ever request to change the photo. She refused to comply and wrote her own ending.

Now mommy went to the media. Utterly ridiculous all the way around. No wonder she is such a baby who insists on getting her way.

[33girl]

There are already enough creepy guys on Tinder. Wearing sorority letters and playing into all those old stereotypical fantasies would increase the amount of creepy guys exponentially. She should probably get terminated for lack of brain cells.

[KohawkAlumna08]

This story is coming up on Good Morning America for those in the Central timezone.

[Kevin]

Those letters do not belong to you. They belong to your organization. It is your privilege to be able to use those letters. Use them in a manner the organization deems inappropriate for any reason and you may lose the right to use those letters. It really is that simple. Unless you are a member of that organization's national staff which handles disciplinary appeals and there is an appeal before you, this case is absolutely no one's business but the parties involved.

[PhilTau]

After seeing that the letters worn on the Tinder post were Chi Omega's, the organizational sensitivity and strict followup action are more understandable.