How do I appropriately address dropping/withdrawing from formal recruitment?

[sweptbystars]

I posted a few months ago about dropping/withdrawing from my university's formal recruitment process in October. I'll admit that I am an idiot for doing so, and could have found a home if I saw recruitment through to the end. I can't change the decision I made, but I can change how I approach informal recruitment this upcoming semester.

I'm currently signed up for an interview with a national representative from the sorority that is colonizing on my campus. Four of the eight chapters on campus are having informal recruitment. I plan on attending the events of two of those (the rest have conflicting dates) in order to maximize my options/chances. The application I had to fill out for the interview did ask if I went through recruitment before. I was honest. I expect to be asked some question(s) about my experience, so how do I respectfully/appropriately approach any direct question about withdrawing from recruitment (should it come up at any time with any of the chapters)?

[QueenD]

Have you considered telling the truth?

[sweptbystars]

I see how that may have come off wrong.... Let me clarify:
I plan on saying I withdrew from recruitment if asked. If asked why I withdrew I'm not exactly sure I would know how to respond to that? I just don't want to be like "Ugh OMG I hated the chapters that invited me back! *hair flip*" Not that I would ever say/do that. I'm just exaggerating here. Maybe I could just say I didn't feel a connection to the chapters that invited me back?

I hope that clarifies what I meant.

[AZTheta]

Originally Posted by sweptbystars

I posted a few months ago about dropping/withdrawing from my university's formal recruitment process in October. I'll admit that I am an idiot for doing so, and could have found a home if I saw recruitment through to the end. I can't change the decision I made, but I can change how I approach informal recruitment this upcoming semester.

I'm currently signed up for an interview with a national representative from the sorority that is colonizing on my campus. Four of the eight chapters on campus are having informal recruitment. I plan on attending the events of two of those (the rest have conflicting dates) in order to maximize my options/chances. The application I had to fill out for the interview did ask if I went through recruitment before. I was honest. I expect to be asked some question(s) about my experience, so how do I respectfully/appropriately approach any direct question about withdrawing from recruitment (should it come up at any time with any of the chapters)?

Originally Posted by sweptbystars

I see how that may have come off wrong.... Let me clarify:
I plan on saying I withdrew from recruitment if asked. If asked why I withdrew I'm not exactly sure I would know how to respond to that? I just don't want to be like "Ugh OMG I hated the chapters that invited me back! *hair flip*" Not that I would ever say/do that. I'm just exaggerating here. Maybe I could just say I didn't feel a connection to the chapters that invited me back?

I hope that clarifies what I meant.

No, PLEASE, do not say "I didn't feel a connection". That is just wrong on so many levels and the first message you are sending in saying that is "I am too good for the chapters that invited me back."

Besides, that phrase just sets my teeth on edge (and it does for others here, trust me). That's insulting to the chapters that did invite you, by the way. And don't think people don't know or don't talk.

You wrote in your previous thread that you were overwhelmed. Say that, and nothing more. Don't elaborate or offer too much information.

[DZ_Turtle86]

You said it yourself:

...dropped out because I felt like formal recruitment was something I was neither prepared for nor could adapt to...I felt overwhelmed and dropped...I didn't feel confident and I didn't feel like I had much to offer a sorority...I wanted to find myself first and get involved in groups and gain some experience.

Stick to this and don't bring up dress codes, lack of connections, or anything else that sounds whiny about the "system." After all, the colony is going to become part of that system, too.

[33girl]

Are the two sororities' events that you're attending groups that cut you previously? Do you have any friends or connections in those two grouos?

If your answers are, respectively,.yes and no, you need to find a way to juggle your schedule gracefully and visit ALL the sororities, or you will be decreasing your chances of a bid by half. The sororities know other parties are going on. If they get offended that you're making an effort to find the right group for you, it probably isn't a place where you want to be.