Feel Cheated

OPAGal · #1 10-14-2002, 08:36 PM

When I started college I knew nothing about sororities. I'm the first woman in my family to attend college and I had no clue what to really expect. I thought about rush, but then decided to wait. I ended up feeling really lonely that semster because my long time boyfriend who attends the same school had rushed a fraternity and now had less time to spend with me. I really wanted the sisterhood that a sorority brings. So a friend of mine told me about a service sorority that I could join. Well I rushed and the girls all really seemed nice and seemed to like each other. So I joined, but after rush I realized that not only did the girls not like each other they didn't like the sorority in general. There was no sisterhood what so ever.They now say that sisterhood isn't what they're about. Now I feel really cheated because although the service sorority isn't really recognized as a sorority(it's a service organization) And I can join a social sorority I feel like that people will think bad of me for joining the service sorority first. I feel like it will afect the other sororities opinion of me during rush. I really need some opinions on this I really don't know what to do???

nauadpi · #2 10-14-2002, 08:40 PM

I would not worry about being in a service sorority first, because atleast in what i have experienced sororities like women who are involved with outside things. They will just consider you involved there. Or atleast that is what I have experienced. So I say go for it. You also may want to check if there is continuous open recruitment on your campus, because if it is already in the middle of your semester you still may be able to join a chapter now.

OPAGal · #3 10-14-2002, 08:46 PM

I not even really sure about how to check and see if chapters do open recruitment. The sororities on my campus are
Chi Omega
Alpha Delta Pi
Alpha Omicron Pi
Alpha Gamma Delta
Phi Mu
Kappa Delta
Sigma Kappa
How could I find out.

Peaches-n-Cream · #4 10-14-2002, 08:46 PM

Find out about recruitment. I see no reason why any sorority would hold it against you. It bodes well of you that you are a member of a service oriented sorority. You have made a commitment to service. Most sororities want that quality in their new members.

nauadpi · #5 10-14-2002, 08:55 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by OPAGal
I not even really sure about how to check and see if chapters do open recruitment. The sororities on my campus are
Chi Omega
Alpha Delta Pi
Alpha Omicron Pi
Alpha Gamma Delta
Phi Mu
Kappa Delta
Sigma Kappa
How could I find out.

The best way to find out is try to contact the Office of Greek Life on your campus. They will be able to put you in contact with the sororities. The other option is to check for any webpages that the chapters might have, because they may give ways through that to contact them.

Optimist Prime · #6 10-14-2002, 11:49 PM

screw that you should rush!! Don't let them mess with you.

OPAGal · #7 10-15-2002, 01:23 AM

Maybe you all could answer this for me. I heard that as long as I was a pledge that I had to do everything that the sorority did. No matter what, and I'm not really all that comfortable doing a mixer unless it's with my boyfriends fraternity. I mean don't get me wrong. I love fraternity guys. It's just that I'm really not comfortable around drunk guys, and at most of the mixers I know that the guys tend to get really drunk, and I really don't want to put myself in that position. The only reason I'd even go if it was my boyfriend fraternity is he'd be there to watch out for me, and the guys already know where I'm coming from so they're careful around me.(Bad Experience) What could I do about that? Do I have to go or is it optional? I wouldn't want to rush a sorority and then find out that I had to go or I'd be droped.

CutiePie2000 · #8 10-15-2002, 01:43 AM

OPAGirl,

I assume that you go to WKU?
In which case, the sorority page is here:
http://www.wku.edu/Dept/Support/StuA...orrorities.htm

This is good, too:
http://www.wku.edu/Dept/Support/StuA...ssociation.htm
Anyone needing further information concerning rush should contact the Student Activities Office in Downing University Center (745-2459).
You could that number and find out which sororities are doing COB events? If that does not yield fruit, then I would call the houses directly. What can it hurt?

As for your question: Maybe you all could answer this for me. I heard that as long as I was a pledge that I had to do everything that the sorority did.

I noticed that you do not have Delta Gamma at your campus, but here is my take on it. Delta Gamma chapters have certain events that are "anchored" and ones that are not. Events that are anchored, you are not allowed to miss. I assure you that anchored events are things like philanthropy, initiation, chapter meetings, etc. If you are not comfortable fraternizing with men in different fraternities, I think that as long as you are involved in other areas (like intramurals for your sorority, philanthropy, etc.), I don't think that this would be a problem.

I hope that this helped and good luck.

OPAGal · #9 10-15-2002, 01:47 AM

Also just to update you all on the situation with my current service sorority. My little sis came up to me before our meeting tonight and informed me that she went to a service project this weekend and they made her feel so out of place that she finally left and cried all the way home( apparently they were pretty cruel) then during the meeting tonight a few of the girls were making comments about her regarding her weight. Out loud! I mean they were discussing it like it was normal sorority business. Which is so uncalled for since last year she got really sick and had to be put on steriods which is why she gained her weight. I felt so sorry for her. I don't know how much longer I can take them being this cruel to everyone.

OPAGal · #10 10-15-2002, 01:54 AM

Thank you so much CutiePie2000. I love the idea of going to philanthropy, initiation, chapter meetings. I think I'd be a great help with a lot of areas since I've already helped the service sorority plan so many events like our Greek and Athlete Auction to benefit cancer. I love to be involved with projects. I just hope that the sororities on my campus see me as beneficial asset.

CutiePie2000 · #11 10-15-2002, 02:07 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by OPAGal
Which is so uncalled for since last year she got really sick and had to be put on steriods which is why she gained her weight. I felt so sorry for her. I don't know how much longer I can take them being this cruel to everyone.

That is HORRIBLE! That sounds awful!
OpaGirl, please trust what your instincts and inner wisdom is telling you...I would get out!

LeslieAGD · #12 10-15-2002, 08:16 AM

1) Your experience in a service organization shows your dedication to philanthropy and your experience as a leader!

2) From my experience, no sorority makes mixers mandatory. As CutiePie mentioned about DG, many sororities have a system to clarify what is and is not madatory. For example, Alpha Gam has a Red, Buff, and Green coded system.

3) I am sorry to hear about your lil sis. That is awful and uncalled for! ...Want me to kick their a**?

aephi alum · #13 10-15-2002, 09:27 AM

If you're interested in joining an NPC sorority, go for it! Your membership in your service sorority can only help you. Lots of people do both.

Don't worry about mixers - you won't be required to go to any given mixer. You may be asked to participate in a certain percentage of social events, but those include formals and date parties; this is how my chapter did things. An option to consider with the mixers is just going for the first hour or so, before anyone gets too drunk.

As for your service sorority, I'm sorry that things aren't working out better

and I hope you can turn things around.

Take care.

axotiger · #14 10-15-2002, 09:34 AM

Hey, actually... one of my sorority (social) sisters had joined a Service Sorority her freshman year... however she found out that it wasn't for her, so she joined my sorority in the spring of her freshman year. As far as I know she was COB (constant open bidding) ... she's a year older than me so I wasnt here when she came in, but she fit in prefectly. She became VP - ID (aka Pledge Mom) and is real active!!

So I'm SURE you will fit in awesomely and you'll have fun doing all the Philanthropy stuff, and date parties (where you will bring your boyfriend

) and maybe if you get some really close guy friends (that you trust when they're drunk) they can look out for you if you want to check out the mixers and see what the hype is all about!! Personally, my older brother is in a fraternity at school with me, so when I got there... I automatically had 80 older brothers (oy vey), but it was good because I could count on them to look out for met at different parties.

Good luck with everything.

MTSUGURL · #15 10-15-2002, 10:33 AM

OPAGAL, I pm'd you.