Would you open your mate's mail?

AKA2D '91 · #1 04-22-2002, 05:21 PM

From another site:

I have a male relative who has all of his mail sent to my home because his wife opens his mail. I had some friends over this weekend (a married couple) and as I was walking them out they noticed that I had mail in the mail box. I took the mail out and quite a bit of it was for my relative, and I told them that he had his mail sent to my home and I told them the reason why. My male friend said the he believed that his wife had a right to open his mail because she is his wife and that he has nothing to hide.

What do you think? Does a spouse have the right to open your mail, or do you think that any mail that has your name on it is private and should only be opened by the person it is addressed to?

Urbane · #2 04-22-2002, 05:39 PM

For real, i don't open my spouse's mail mainly cause he gets to it before i do. But he opens mine and I have and can open his. IMO, if you mind then you have something to hide.

Ironically, I was over my mom's on Sat and something came for my brother who still lives at home. I thought the "from addressee" was a little weird so I started to read through the envelope until my mom started yelling at me. Now i admit that's flat out wrong.

Honeykiss1974 · #3 04-22-2002, 05:43 PM

Would I open my mate's mail?

.....IN A HEARTBEAT!

Because if we are married, there shouldn't be any secrets between us. Now, if it was just my boyfriend...then no I wouldn't.

HopefulProspective · #4 04-22-2002, 06:20 PM

I have opened mail for my husband when I know it is a bill. But his personal mail, no I don't open it. he doesn't open mine either. If I really wanna look, I will after he has opened it.

Sugar_N_Spice · #5 04-22-2002, 06:24 PM

One word: NO! What happened to relationships being founded on trust??

Hello!!! I WISH my mate wopuld open my mail--unless sit was something that applied to both of us, or it's something he knows I was expecting (or another reason along those lines, for ex. my Mom sends me some money or a package)...But to open MY MAIL off GP--HECK NAW!!!!!!

loviest95 · #6 04-22-2002, 07:47 PM

On some ocassions I do--but it is not as though I feel that I NEED to. He doesn't care. He rarely opens min-- but I don't care either.
Besides -- WHAT is DONE in the DARK ALWAYS comes to LIGHT

exquizit · #7 04-22-2002, 09:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by loviest95
WHAT is DONE in the DARK ALWAYS comes to LIGHT

I'm a firm believer in that one. But I wouldn't look. What you seek you shall find!

kitten03 · #8 04-23-2002, 12:11 AM

Everyone is entitled to some type of privacy. Mail is one of them. I have no reason to open my mate's mail. Just as he has no right to open mine. It's just rude

kiml122 · #9 04-23-2002, 08:23 AM

Do I open my mates mail...in a word no. Somethings are just private. There have been times when he was waiting for something and I was home first and he was like open that and let me know what it says. I have also done the same thing. It has nothing to do with hiding something, but I just feel that there should be some kind of privacy somewhere in a relationship.

Like loviest95 stated, what is done in the dark does come to the light if someone is being sneaky.....that's just my opinion.

CkretCrush8 · #10 04-23-2002, 12:48 PM

I guess it all depends on the conversation that my future husband and I will discuss. I don't have a problem with him opening mail addressed to me if it's a bill or something, or maybe something "private". But once we make those vows, nothing is private anymore. We become one, therefore, we share everything. I don't plan on having any secrets from my husband, and I believe this could be a footstool in allowing something/someone to cause division and strife. But like i said, I probably won't have a problem with him opening my mail or vice versa. I'll never know until the situation arises.

mccoyred · #11 04-23-2002, 05:13 PM

Normally, whoever gets the mail first opens it.

We don't open mail that is clearly personal, let's say a letter or a card other than birthday/Christmas/other holiday. Also, my husband does not open ANY Delta-related mail (he is not Greek). Other than that, everything else is fair game.

There are no trust issues here.

The Original Ape · #12 04-23-2002, 06:46 PM

bills, notices from your child's school, and investment notices/updates, yes; anything else, no.

#1 Leading Lady · #13 04-24-2002, 10:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by mccoyred
Normally, whoever gets the mail first opens it.

We don't open mail that is clearly personal, let's say a letter or a card other than birthday/Christmas/other holiday. Also, my husband does not open ANY Delta-related mail (he is not Greek). Other than that, everything else is fair game.

There are no trust issues here.

I am with you on this one 100%.

Swamp Thang · #14 04-24-2002, 02:25 PM

Once you make your wedding vows, some things are STILL PRIVATE !!! I wish my wife wooooooould open my letters and correspondance from Omega Psi Phi Nationals/Grad Chapter/ etc... That's none of her business. If it's a bill or something addressed to both of us... then of course either of us can open it. If it's something addressed to her from DST, her Mom or relative, her job.. WHATEVER... I'm not touching it before she does. Once she opens it, then I will ask her about it if I'm interested...

CJUS · #15 04-25-2002, 12:50 PM

You Better Believe I Would, am, or whatever the case maybe because what's his is mine and what's mine is mine. Just like someone else stated previously that there shouldn't be nothing to hide. And if the person mind, then there is something questionable that is going on. And besides he opens mines. Now if we were just dating and not living to gether--I probably wouldn't, but I would be very suspicious and ask him what this is about. But if we are living together then I will open it and dare him to Raise Cain about it.